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OfflineWornTraveler
Captain Cannabis
Male


Registered: 06/15/08
Posts: 561
Loc: Florida, USA
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Curing Depression Without Drugs
    #10294075 - 05/05/09 10:49 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

So, lots of shit going wrong in my life lately. Girlfriend died in a car accident; cat about to be put down; got busted by the cops, went to jail and got out on probation, and had to stop smoking weed (which was kind of like figuring out how to live without breathing); suspended from the University for a year (because of the arrest); crashed my car (sober, of all the times to do it); got serious writers block (which is a major pain in the ass since it's my fucking livelihood); one of my closest friends that's a girl just randomly fucked this piece of shit asshole who owes me a shit ton of money and happens to be the most retarded, bland, slimiest piece of shit on the planet; got narc'ed on by a guy I've been friends with, smoking and chilling for a whole fucking year (which lead to the arrest); stuck in the county on my probation conditions and can't go home till my trial so I'm fucking homeless crashing from one couch to the other; broke because I'm spending literally all my money on drug tests, court fees, fines and legal fees; serious problems at home with my mother where nearly every conversation ends with me telling her to fuck herself because she keeps telling me that drugs let demons in my head (wttfbbq?)...

And it's really fucking got me down. I tried killing myself with heroin but even with all my money couldn't afford a lethal dose and just ended up vomiting my guts out and watching my fingernails turn blue while I sat in a bathroom in utter euphoria for a few hours. I spend my entire day going over fantasies in my head where I just either go crazy and hide out in the woods living like a hermit and growing my own pot plants out in buttfuck nowhere, or beat the shit out of asshole-slimeball and then fuck the brains out of that girl; tell my PO to go fuck himself and light up a blunt; just all sorts of retarded shit that I'm completely powerless to do because it would just get me in more trouble. I want to go back to the way things were before, but I just spend my entire day miserable. How do I get back to normal without zonking my brain chock full of drugs? No suggestion too wild to consider.


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Captain Cannabis, Guardian of Ganja, Sultan of Shrooms, Giver of Green, Tabbed Tripper, and all around Good Guy.

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Offlinelaserpig
Weedmaster_P

Registered: 04/28/09
Posts: 7,468
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: WornTraveler]
    #10294519 - 05/05/09 11:59 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

Put bluntly, it sounds like you recently got fucked by life, and pretty severely.

Sometimes that is how it goes, though. Every so often you draw the short straw -- but the odds are very, very low that you're gonna continue getting this unlucky for much longer.

You've clearly already weathered a good deal of shit, which shows that you can take a lot. Just keep up the resilience a bit longer -- I know its within your ability to do so.

And I don't think the suggestion counts as "wild," but all I do have one piece of advice: focus on things you enjoy.

God knows you could use a break, right?
So give yourself one.

If the things you used to enjoy aren't available to you now, look around for other things.
Depression can be very nasty if you let it take hold, but as far as I've seen a good way to fight it is to keep yourself occupied.
Ruminating on your situation feeds the thoughts that are depressing you in the first place -- investing yourself in pursuits you enjoy helps prevent this from happening.


--------------------
Weedmaster P knows the truth.

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OfflineFraggin
Multi-Faceted
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Registered: 01/05/05
Posts: 8,707
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: laserpig]
    #10295831 - 05/06/09 08:52 AM (14 years, 10 months ago)

How do I get back to normal without zonking my brain chock full of drugs? No suggestion too wild to consider.

Things will never be what they were before hit rock bottom. There's no reason to live in the past and use your era of comfort as a guideline for your future. The experiences you have had will shape your life from now on. Your blissful past was not affected by these recent events, so, what is to say that you could even re-live those moments with the person you are now.

Life dealt you a shitty hand, you can either let it destroy you, or you can look up to your next challenge.

Right now, the legal system owns you. Sorry. You gotta pay your dues.
As long as you are on probation, illegal activities will only make you paranoid. Paranoia leads to fear, fear leads to sadness.

I would reccomend you check out some of the free programs in your area for people in situations like yourself and possibly even do some volounteer work. There's nothing more to this life than providing for others. If you are a writer, do you not write for your audience? Don't lose focus on what is real in life, which, is very little.

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OfflineWornTraveler
Captain Cannabis
Male


Registered: 06/15/08
Posts: 561
Loc: Florida, USA
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: Fraggin]
    #10309094 - 05/08/09 04:50 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

I've been alone in my friends house for a week now, because I can't leave the county till my trial. All of my friends from school are gone for the summer' I'm completely alone. I'm just going insane.

I finished off what I had left of a fifth of Captain last night, thinking I'd just chill and forget all that was bothering me. I ended up focusing on those troubles exclusively; it was like a bad trip, except I couldn't just listen to music and think positive and make it go away.  :sad:


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Captain Cannabis, Guardian of Ganja, Sultan of Shrooms, Giver of Green, Tabbed Tripper, and all around Good Guy.

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Offlinesunflower
We're here....
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Registered: 08/19/06
Posts: 552
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: WornTraveler]
    #10309263 - 05/08/09 05:25 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

Start an intense exercise program.


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Offlinekriminalelement
"jesus wept."
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Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 1,201
Loc: Ay! los popos estan aqui!
Last seen: 13 years, 8 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: sunflower]
    #10312117 - 05/09/09 09:38 AM (14 years, 10 months ago)

Realize that all life is a delusion, and you must not be attached to the world. Never expect life to be happy or pleasant. Expect it to be full of pain. This episode is life telling you that you should transcend attachment. If you don't, if you continue to hold onto things like "pleasure" "happiness" "friendships" or even mother-son relationships, you will continue to feel the pain you feel now. Break the cycle.


--------------------
While there is a lower class, I am in it
While there is a criminal element, I am of it
While there is a soul in prison, I am not free.

Eugene V Debs

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OfflineInnerStillness
<3 U
Male

Registered: 03/06/06
Posts: 91
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: WornTraveler]
    #10314999 - 05/09/09 10:41 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

I second the start an intense workout program.  start with some pushups, then go to abs, then to jumping jacks or something for cardio. then refine your workout and focus on a specific area and alternate days.

Sounds like you need some good quality habits.  Thing about good habits is they suck in the beginning, but in the end they pay off.  Working out would be really easy to start doing.  You can do it right now if you want.  But you have to want it, thats the thing that can be tricky.  Next, this may take more discipline, start some kind of focused breathing meditation.  Focusing on your breath for 10-15 twice a day can really start to clear a lot of the clutter in you mind.  Pick up the book The Power of Now and check that out. 

These things can put you on the right path, its not an easy path but it will lead you to a place of relative comfort, so long as you keep improving yourself. 

Peace and <3

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OfflineSyle
Kenai Sigh
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Registered: 10/16/05
Posts: 6,678
Loc: WA
Last seen: 1 year, 21 days
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: WornTraveler]
    #10315092 - 05/09/09 11:00 PM (14 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

WornTraveler said:
I've been alone in my friends house for a week now, because I can't leave the county till my trial. All of my friends from school are gone for the summer' I'm completely alone. I'm just going insane.

I finished off what I had left of a fifth of Captain last night, thinking I'd just chill and forget all that was bothering me. I ended up focusing on those troubles exclusively; it was like a bad trip, except I couldn't just listen to music and think positive and make it go away.  :sad:




i think really digging deep and determining at the core of who you are, what it is you want from life.

once you are honest with yourself and determine what that is EXACTLY, then you will come to the proper and logic conclusion on how to ascertain that goal.

From the bottom of my heart I am sorry for the loss of your girlfriend. I know that if what happened to you happened to me, I would probably already be dead. You have weathered a lot; stuff that no one really should, and above all else you sound like a tough son of a bitch. You should pick yourself up, man up, and do what needs to be done: get your priorities down (which it sounds like you are attempting to do), and stop abusing substances. Go clean for a while. Breath the air as it naturally should be absorbed by your body and brain. Hear sounds the way they naturally should. Absorb the natural world, and see where it takes you.


--------------------
https://kenaisigh.bandcamp.com/ <- Just completed the 2021 RPM challenge for February - An EP in one month (5 songs or 20 minutes). Check it out!

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Offlinederarm
Stranger
Registered: 06/01/09
Posts: 1
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: Syle]
    #10433707 - 06/01/09 02:58 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

...

Edited by WhiskeyClone (06/01/09 12:19 PM)

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InvisibleChiefGreenLeaf
Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 1,596
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: WornTraveler]
    #10436074 - 06/01/09 03:46 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

hey just thought i would throw out how i deal with the bullshit in life.

exercise
cook good food
clean & organize
take naps
drink herbal tea

if you can focus on doing something that will ease your mind and make you proud. for example, one thing i see with most everybody that has 'issues' is that they live like a slob. imagine your residence being perfectly clean and stocked with all the goodies you love. it's just a start

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OfflinePDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Registered: 12/03/02
Posts: 10,675
Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 8 years, 6 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: ChiefGreenLeaf]
    #10438090 - 06/01/09 09:46 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

exercise and diet are key!


--------------------
GO OUTSIDE.

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Offlinecryptic_pickle
Stranger
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Registered: 05/22/08
Posts: 677
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: PDU]
    #10439073 - 06/02/09 12:25 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Woah man, yeah thats just really bad luck...  All that shit happening at once...  I dunno all suggestions above sound good exercise etc. 
Isolation is probably a factor in your depression, you said your friends have all left, and your girlfriend is gone...  I dunno sometimes when you
feel isolated even just walking down a busy street or sitting in a cafe can help you feel more connected :shrug:

But yeah I think if you can just weather the storm you'll be ok :thumbup:


--------------------
"What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
"He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
"And why did that upset you?"
"My name is Susan."

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Offlinetakeacti0n
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Registered: 05/25/09
Posts: 212
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: cryptic_pickle]
    #10440217 - 06/02/09 08:42 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Keep on truckin, things will only get better.


--------------------

shine on forever benevolent son!

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Offlineshroomaker
Stranger
Registered: 04/13/05
Posts: 191
Last seen: 8 months, 14 days
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: takeacti0n]
    #10440494 - 06/02/09 10:03 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Well, I have got nothing to add except to encourage you to keep posting on the net and any other avenues for "getting it out" that you can. Sometimes just knowing that you are really not alone makes a huge difference. I have recently been somewhat alone, unemployed and without prospects, getting older and more hopeless myself. One final thought: Can you plant a garden and grow you some veggies or other such stuff? Its been a life saver for me (in addition to growing some of the legal ethnobotanical stuff). My heart goes out to you man.

One final word of wisdom concerning that other guy; Don't let folks like this occupy even one brain cell in your head! Act as though he never existed. Easy for me to say right?

Edited by shroomaker (06/02/09 10:05 AM)

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OfflineSolemente
Male


Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 4,337
Loc: Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: shroomaker]
    #10440917 - 06/02/09 11:52 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Take up disc golf. It is my anti-depression.

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Invisiblebosch
Registered: 01/16/09
Posts: 92
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: Solemente]
    #10444527 - 06/02/09 09:50 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

+1 for the good food, exercise, tea suggestions.

It won't sound like much now, but when I scraped through the roughest patch of my life, once I did finally get out, life became so fucking easy. When you know you can get through all that, and on your own, nobody's help, no drugs (well, I drank heavily, but), I made it through shit tougher than most people ever have to go through in this country if nothing else.

It's a good feeling.

Good luck. I do agree that you need to be sure to give yourself breaks; you do deserve them if only for the sheer amount of shit you have piled on your plate right now. Try to wane off drugs and the like as much as possible, and try to get into more constructive vices... A love of good food can work wonders, too; learning to cook can be very satisfying, and may make people more willing to put you up, you know? Go for a drive, go for a walk, whatever, if you get overwhelmed. More little, indulgent things like that.

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Offlinegodspeedyou
to the face


Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 95
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: bosch]
    #10450812 - 06/03/09 10:45 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

I would recommend meditation, yoga, and exercise. :thumbup:


--------------------
Try to realize it's all within yourself
No-one else can make you change

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OfflineSyle
Kenai Sigh
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Registered: 10/16/05
Posts: 6,678
Loc: WA
Last seen: 1 year, 21 days
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: derarm]
    #10457412 - 06/04/09 11:03 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

derarm said:
...




wtf does that mean?


--------------------
https://kenaisigh.bandcamp.com/ <- Just completed the 2021 RPM challenge for February - An EP in one month (5 songs or 20 minutes). Check it out!

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OfflineGetHyphae
Stranger


Registered: 12/11/08
Posts: 212
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: Syle]
    #10459744 - 06/05/09 12:41 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Stay busy. Whenever I am real down I need to find projects to occupy me. I hope you have some good friends, that can get me out of any situation.

Best wishes for you. Things take time, but if you take a step back and ride things out I am sure it will get better.

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OfflinepsychedelicSLUG
ovoideocystidiata protector
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Registered: 11/20/08
Posts: 3,291
Loc: NJ Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: GetHyphae]
    #10461317 - 06/06/09 02:09 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

st johns wort and maintaining a healthy balanced lifestyle may help :grin: it worked for me along with running and meditation!


--------------------

:sun:Variety is the spice of life!:sun:



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OfflinepsychedelicSLUG
ovoideocystidiata protector
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Registered: 11/20/08
Posts: 3,291
Loc: NJ Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: GetHyphae]
    #10461322 - 06/06/09 02:11 PM (14 years, 9 months ago)

also try looking into 5-hydroxytryptophan... its questionable if it crosses the blood/brain barrier but it seemed to help me ALOT :wink:


--------------------

:sun:Variety is the spice of life!:sun:



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Offlinebocuma
Stranger

Registered: 01/09/09
Posts: 23
Last seen: 14 years, 6 months
Re: Curing Depression Without Drugs [Re: psychedelicSLUG]
    #10469915 - 06/08/09 08:59 AM (14 years, 9 months ago)

Nothing has helped me as profoundly as meditation courses. Its all non-profit and non dogmatic. So I highly recommend checking it out if you feel you are capable after reading the course description.

Its a very intensive program so in the meantime I would recommend to drink lots of water and live a healthy lifestyle. Good food, no junk.

Free 10day residential meditation courses:

See course description: http://www.dhamma.org/en/code.shtml

Center's in America: http://www.dhamma.org/en/bycountry/na/

Best wishes for the future.

Regards

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