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 cam4eva
lostsoul
Registered: 11/03/07
Posts: 176
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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 MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) 
#10269147 - 05/01/09 02:09 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Well guys my life has been a bit of a rollercoaster as of late. i have always had a low mood and been slightly depressed and for a long time it affected my ability to live life. I wouldnt even want to go to the store because I didnt know how to act. i wasnt on any medication and had been smoking lots.
I swore I would never touch other drugs but i was in desperate need for a change in life and after my friend did acid he said he had changed for the better and I could see it in him. I decided to try acid wow what an amazing experience it put me on to a new side of myself a happy side a side that was not afraid. I graduated to extacy usage(heavy) and continued to explore this side of myself I had never known. I felt like a made man for the first time in my life like I could do anything. After a while though I stopped using e because whenever I was sober I could not maintain that same degree of happiness. I decided to take a chance as see my pdoc, and she perscribed me some medication(invega and lamictal) and this made me feel alright much better then when I wasnt on the medication.
Then I decided to add 5htp to the mix taking 10 to 15 capsules a day and I have been feeling great.(I know thats a lot but hey whatever works I guess) Everything I dreamed of me to be I was with 5htp and I didnt need E for the first time in my life. But as of the past couple of days I have been depressed and Im not sure why.I think it might be due to me thinking I was depressed(I felt good but I felt like something was missing) which might have put me in the depression. My concern is if the 5htp isnt working as good? I have been using 5htp since feb and Ive felt great does anyone know if 5htp wears off after a while?
My doc perscribed me laxapro but I havent taken it do you guys think I should try it or give the 5htp and myself a little more time? Im worried because I love feeling like I can handle the world and 5htp helps me do that without using drugs and I love that, but I know if it stops working and nothing else helps then I will stop using my meds and just pop E again and only have that to look foward too. I know thats hard to understand but my whole life Ive struggled just to feel alive where as for almost everyone else they feel alive everyday.
I hate it cause I dont understand why I had to be born this way I feel like its not fair that I must suffer everyday where as everyone else gets to enjoy their life cause their brain chemistry is normal. You guys dont even know how hard it is to live like that and the way I feel is if these meds and 5htp arent contributing then i have to have something in my life to make me feel happy even if it will kill me in the long run at least I can say I did what I felt was best for me. Id rather live one day happy then 1 thousand days sad. anyone feel me on this and understand where Im coming from?
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest
Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
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 Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: cam4eva]
#10269175 - 05/01/09 02:15 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Fuck the drugs, turn round, man up, and face what's making you unhappy.
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Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards.
"Chat your fraff
Chat your fraff
Just chat your fraff
Chat your fraff"
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emeraldcity108
The Lizard King
Registered: 06/21/06
Posts: 110
Loc: In a van down by the rive...
Last seen: 4 days, 48 minutes
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: Grapefruit]
#10269292 - 05/01/09 02:35 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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I take the max recomended dose of 5htp a day 100mg(one pill!!!!!) That is a shit load of 5htp.
please guinea pig indulge us more of your 5htp use side affect ect...
I though heavy use was really bad for your heart,and if you go to your doctor to get an SSRI be careful using that much 5htp
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envisionary333
Biopsychosociospiritual Being
Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 201
Loc: The Eternal Present
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: cam4eva]
#10269295 - 05/01/09 02:36 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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I've suffered with clinical depression as well and have used seven different antidepressants, as well as 5-htp and other supplements, over many years. Ecstasy was the first drug I ever tried, and I pinned all my hope on it as a cure for my depression. Although I didn't use it often, I would think about that feeling constantly and wait to feel well again with each use, only to crash harder afterwards. Keep in mind that ecstasy, if overused, can have a damaging effect on your serotonin system, which may be part what is contributing to your depression in the first place. I'm not saying you shouldn't use it ever, but be careful about it and try to keep the lowest frequency/dose schedule you can. When you do roll, make the most out of each time and use it as an opportunity to understand your depression, rather than just escape it. Escape is temporary, but understanding is the foundation for recovery.
One of the greatest anti-depressants I have found is aerobic exercise. Honestly, I think it's more effective than most medications! Even if I do just 20-30 minutes in the morning on my elliptical, I feel totally rejuvenated and ready to face the day. It really helps, and I can't recommend it enough. Developing my spirituality and meditating has also had a major effect on my well being. One book that changed my outlook a lot is "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle, and since then I've found many more books that have helped me grow a great deal.
For me personally, I have found that psychedelics are much more healing on a spiritual level than MDMA. My favorite healer is San Pedro cactus, which promotes a euphoria very similar to MDMA but with more depth and less damage. It is a good alternative for the long run, because ecstasy will eventually lose it's "magic" and can contribute to problems with depression. With ecstasy, I feel amazing when on it, then horrible once it wears off. With mescaline, there is a beautiful afterglow and refreshment that remains even once the drug is out of my system.
I hope this information is helpful to you, I understand where you are coming from and I think there are many others who will understand as well. I'm wishing you the best and don't give up hope!
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"All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream."
Edgar Allan Poe
"Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine."
Sir Arthur Eddington
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envisionary333
Biopsychosociospiritual Being
Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 201
Loc: The Eternal Present
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: envisionary333]
#10269328 - 05/01/09 02:44 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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One more thing- please make sure your doctor is aware of all the 5-htp you are taking on top of the antidepressants, because this can potentially cause "serotonin syndrome," which is rare but can be fatal. It's always better to be on the safe side. I can't imagine needing 10-15 pills of 5-htp, that seems like a lot! I only use 2 100mg time-release pills a day.
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"All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream."
Edgar Allan Poe
"Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine."
Sir Arthur Eddington
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leftfoot
Stranger
Registered: 01/15/09
Posts: 125
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: envisionary333]
#10269361 - 05/01/09 02:51 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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i have found that shrooming in the nature gives me a great acceptance of my life and leaves me really motivated and inspired
also regular excercise makes a great impact on your well being, so does keeping your room and yourself clean, music is also a huge factor in terms of feelings.. also, going to clubs and dance, and not just the normal people dancing but removing the shyness and actually trying to dance good and being creative
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[quote]all the world really needs is farmers, and how everything else amounts to coping with a situation of artificial usefulness, addictions, and coveting all the empty stuff that everybody else gets involved with, like sex, cigarettes and coca cola [/quote]
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cam4eva
lostsoul
Registered: 11/03/07
Posts: 176
Last seen: 11 years, 10 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: leftfoot]
#10269404 - 05/01/09 03:01 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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side effects of to much 5htp are throwing up like crazy(only once a day if I take to much but you throw up literly like crazy) no heart problems though I didnt know it was bad for your heart
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emeraldcity108
The Lizard King
Registered: 06/21/06
Posts: 110
Loc: In a van down by the rive...
Last seen: 4 days, 48 minutes
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: cam4eva]
#10272286 - 05/02/09 08:23 AM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Too much increases serotonin in your bloodstream.http://groups.google.com/group/sci.med.pharmacy/msg/25ff931c5b3cd941
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ManyAk
Not A Shitgiver
Registered: 01/21/09
Posts: 1,081
Loc: Somewhere but not here
Last seen: 2 days, 19 hours
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: Grapefruit]
#10272355 - 05/02/09 08:56 AM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said:
Fuck the drugs, turn round, man up, and face what's making you unhappy.
+1
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we are all luminous beings
why then do we not appear before each other radiant in our illumination
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12468
Stranger
Registered: 12/04/07
Posts: 971
Last seen: 11 years, 3 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: envisionary333]
#10273057 - 05/02/09 12:00 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
envisionary333 said:
One of the greatest anti-depressants I have found is aerobic exercise
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 Mr Cyan
3
Registered: 09/27/08
Posts: 626
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: 12468]
#10273112 - 05/02/09 12:13 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Drugs are no cure for depression. The only cure is self.
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UniversalSoldier
Stranger
Registered: 04/29/09
Posts: 9
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: Mr Cyan]
#10273213 - 05/02/09 12:44 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Look into Rhodiola Rosea as an alternative to massive amounts of 5-htp. The herbal adaptogenic herb that helps the body's reaction to stress and fatigue. Very benificial, in my experience.
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Culpepers
Open-Minded Fugitive
Registered: 08/28/08
Posts: 385
Loc: Denmark 
Last seen: 12 years, 5 days
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: UniversalSoldier]
#10273687 - 05/02/09 02:33 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
UniversalSoldier said:
Look into Rhodiola Rosea as an alternative to massive amounts of 5-htp. The herbal adaptogenic herb that helps the body's reaction to stress and fatigue. Very benificial, in my experience.
Thanks for the heads-up :-) . Rhodiola R. looks like a very interesting plant!
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"Imagine all of creation as a big pond of water. Your life is a drop of water falling from the sky. During life you feel separate and then you hit the water and become one with it. There is no drop of water anymore, just the pond."
-- ChinaCat72
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kikthecan
uhh
Registered: 02/25/09
Posts: 348
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
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Re: MY life and the impact of Extacy and 5htp(Good and Evil)) [Re: Culpepers]
#10273855 - 05/02/09 03:22 PM (14 years, 11 months ago) |
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well goodluck with that, i'm sure you don't need ecstasy now
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 3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.
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