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OfflineTemazzie
MethamphetamineFueled Dictator

Registered: 09/01/04
Posts: 32
Last seen: 19 years, 1 month
drugs and depression
    #3249557 - 10/12/04 09:42 PM (19 years, 5 months ago)

My summer involved some fucked up stuff. A girl I had a thing for was sure felt the same way about me turned out to see me as just a friend. That was the first brick in the wall of my summer and the first time I caused harm to my body to deal with my anger/depression. A few weeks later i was arrested for third degree burglary. Those charges are fucked, all i was doing was walking around an old ass empty building, maybe trespassing, but fucking burglary? I spent the day in DJJ until my mom picked me up and told me I was grounded. Here's where the drugs come in. To deal with the events of the day I came home and took a Clonazepam(I think its for anxiety or something). I also drank four or five glasses of wine. Anyway I decided to take a razor to my hand and i just started cutting it up(I wasn't suicidal but i have been several times). I carved an eight looking thing and a game of tic tack toe, also two very deep cuts. It became infected but my parents took me to the doctor and i got some antibiotic for it. My hand was FUCKed up and still is. But anyway I'm not sure if I did it because I was depressed and angry or because of the drugs, probably a combination of the two because i was able to bleed my hand out and not even feel it.

I used to take Wellbutrin XR 300mg for my depression but now I take Zoloft 50mg which seems to work better. I haven't caused harm to myself since the hand incident, but I have also stopped taking pills. Coricidin, temezepam, clonazepam, gabatril(that was a trip) and lots of wellbutrin when i didn't have anything better. When I took pills i had no motivation and probably was just numbing my brain which was numbing the depression. Herb is the only thing that I think somewhat helps me when I'm feeling shitty but even when high I can start getting down.

So has anyone else used pills or other drugs to deal with depression or while depressed? Has anyone become depressed from lack of drugs?

PEacE


--------------------
No I do not support the national socialist party.

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OfflineMAGnum
veteran

Registered: 07/08/04
Posts: 2,421
Last seen: 12 years, 3 months
Re: drugs and depression [Re: Temazzie]
    #3249621 - 10/12/04 09:56 PM (19 years, 5 months ago)

Man, that sounds like it sucks. Burglary is a BS charge if the place was abandonned.

Cutting your hand is bad. I have tried the self muthilation thing and it wasn't worth it. I cut up my arm pretty bad with a scalple and it didn't get infected. I would never cut my hands because I wouldn't be able to cover it up.

Getting off of drugs can mess up your chemistry. It is always better to ease off of drugs.


--------------------
Agent 727
7

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InvisibleGnuBobo
Frilly Cuffs Extraordinaire
 User Gallery

Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 43,754
Loc: Charisma
Re: drugs and depression [Re: MAGnum]
    #3249698 - 10/12/04 10:08 PM (19 years, 5 months ago)

I've done my share of boozing and drugs. Not many pharmies, tho.
It's different for everyone with depression, and which meds work best. Frankly, I was waaaayy clinically depressed and suicidal this Spring because of complications from illness. Perhaps you might try some different meds? You may have two different difficulties in your head here: 1) Depression and 2) OCD or anxiety or something that causes the cutting. I don't know much about that, tho.
Anyway, if you can, find a cool psychiatrist you can relate to and try to work with him/her. Take care of this while (I hope) you're still insured.
Just remember, it's generally accepted now that these illnesses are phsical in that they involve a chemical imbalance in your brain. But this manifests as behavior, which seems like something you should be able to control.

Good luck, man.

GB


--------------------
Jerry Garcia. JERRY GARCIA! JERRY GARCIA!!!!

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OfflineDivided_Sky
Ten ThousandThings

Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 3,171
Loc: The Shining Void
Last seen: 15 years, 9 months
Re: drugs and depression [Re: GnuBobo]
    #3249746 - 10/12/04 10:15 PM (19 years, 5 months ago)

Be careful with weed when you are in really hard times. It can easily become a a negative influence if you aren't watchful.

I think long run the best way to deal with depression is to reprogram your mind through meditation to help you think happier without messing up any chemistry. Check out Buddhist Lamrim meditation, it has helped me alot.


--------------------
1. "After an hour I wasn't feeling anything so I decided to take another..."
2. "We were feeling pretty good so we decided to smoke a few bowls..."
3. "I had to be real quiet because my parents were asleep upstairs..."

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InvisibleJettaJay
PsychedelicStranger
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/14/04
Posts: 2,829
Re: drugs and depression [Re: Temazzie]
    #3253657 - 10/19/04 09:33 PM (19 years, 5 months ago)

Dude about 2 years ago I took a hunting knife to my wrist. Noone seemed to notice and when my mom finally noticed she said well you will get what you deserve. I never really understood what that meant but then she a bitch. Thats when I moved in with my grandparents.

I'm not saying to move out but That it will eventually get better. There is nothing out there you can't handle given time. TRUST ME.


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I saw a little green light buzzing around in a tree, and it dawned on me that "they" were here
~~~LouiseLouise



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Offlinelilchicken34
Stranger
Registered: 11/01/04
Posts: 1
Last seen: 19 years, 4 months
I feel like I'm dying inside [Re: JettaJay]
    #3305358 - 11/01/04 03:00 PM (19 years, 4 months ago)

Hi, i have a close friend who has a bad addiction with smoking cocaine, not only that, but she is severely depressed. She has been honest to be about wanting to die or killing her self. I don't know what to do..i need help, I'm going crazy with all this. I'm just a college student. I'm so scared. I feel responsible for her. She lashes out at me when I try telling her how I'm feeling. She's very stubborn. I try doing what she asks, then she flips, and doesn't want it...it just feels like a lose-lose situation. I'm trying to be the strong one..but I feel like I'm dying inside. I'm all she has, he family sort of disowned her. She said she was going to stop about 3wks ago, but yesterday I found a used spoon and baking soda in her shorts, in which I was going to wash. I brought it up to her and she flipped.She pushed me and trashed our room. I love her too death, but I don't know how much more of this I could take. I was stupid to believe she was actually going to stop? I took her to a Drug & Alcohol Abuse Center, after that day she said no one can help her. She promised me again that she would stop...should I expect more relapses? I feel so alone and scared, please god give me the strength...

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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa

Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,235
Re: drugs and depression [Re: Temazzie]
    #3305439 - 11/01/04 03:18 PM (19 years, 4 months ago)

Drugs are not good for you depressed people that includes me some times. That includes every one for that matter. Hidding behind a drug never fixes a problem only hides it and sooner or later you will have to face that problem to make it right. Ween sings a song called ZOLOFT yall should listen to it or give it a search and read it. My familys mad screwed up moms been eating prozak for year, She is just to nice and nevergave me any parenting.

Realise the world is full of pain and suffering, you can not bite into hwat Tvs sitcoms make it out to be thats fantasized. the way to get above that is to work your hardest for the day and make it the best you can. No drug can make your life what you want it to be it will only hinder your movment forward.

Get motivated get moving get going keep your self busy and a day sitting here is a day half wasted unless you learn something. Exercise also helps.


Lil chiken... Your friend will never be the same and she will only go till she hits rock bottom. Be there for her but even more have her parents there for her. Getting her into detox/rehab is the first step. Being there for her so she doesnt feel alone after is the next. Keep her away from booze cuz she will definetly relapse. And yes she will fuck up a few times maybe many times.
A friend I though thats been clean 2 years now has a kid and a women. I saw him the other day on the highway. When I stoped and pulled over he was doped up like crazy. He was fallowing me back 2 town a few cars back. I passed a cop on the exit and was like damn I got a feeling that cops waiting for my friend. Well all in all he is in prison now on 2 felonies. Lifes a bitch sometimes.

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Offline3eyes
Citizen of Earth
Registered: 09/09/04
Posts: 63
Last seen: 19 years, 1 month
Re: drugs and depression [Re: Temazzie]
    #3308083 - 11/02/04 06:41 AM (19 years, 4 months ago)

You should try some other alternative treatment other than medication drugs.

I took a depression drug before. it didn't do anything for me. Luckily i wasn't addicted to it.

You heard of Essential Oils (from young living? they're made from plants. Do your research on the internet to read more about them. I highly recommend it.

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InvisibleCorporal Kielbasa

Registered: 05/29/04
Posts: 17,235
Re: drugs and depression [Re: 3eyes]
    #3308156 - 11/02/04 07:44 AM (19 years, 4 months ago)

the oils are very expensive but wurth every penny.

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