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Anonymous
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The village WARNING SPOILERS
#2950614 - 08/01/04 12:12 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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The Village in 4 minutes or less (warning spoilers in this story DO NOT READ if you have not seen the movie)
A little boy has died? LETS EAT! Amish like.. Amish like? pass the bread Jamison thank you sister, and god bless. EEEEKKKK!!! EKKKKKKK!! Amish like people?. Eerie silence? One retarded man HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH Noises stop life on the farm goes on. Kinda slow to speak Lucius enters a elders hall and begins to read a letter Lucius; I want to go to town to get medicine so people don?t die, the end Talk talk talk yeah yeah yeah Retarded man hits kids with stick woman: You have to take a time out in the quit room retarded man: No no no no no no no woman: Ok I wont make you go in there if you promise never to hit again retarded man: Ok woman: LETS RACE UP THE MOUNTIAN! Woman; And oh yeah I am blind by the way. Up at the top of the mountain Blind woman: Hello Lucius Lucius; How did you know I was here sitting on a rock at the top of the mountain you just blindly ran up? Blind woman: I can see your color DON?T ASK ME WHAT IT IS! Lucius; Um ok I didn?t saw anything Blind woman: IT WOULD BE UNLADY LIKE TO TELL YOU SUCH THINGS Lucius; Look I never said Blind woman: NO NO NO NO NO Lucius; Righhhhht Retarded man puts a frog in blind woman?s hand Blind woman: YUCK Blind man puts red berries in blind woman?s hand Lucius; BEWERE for those berries are the forbidden color.. Blind woman: WE MUST BARRY THEM STRAIGHT AWAY Lucius; Where did you get those retarded man retarded man: In the woods Lucius; We must never go into the woods we have a truce with the ?creatures? retarded man: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH Lucius AGAIN stands in front of the council Lucius; I believe they didn?t hard retard because he was pure of heart and I am pure of heart and they will see that and let me get medicine and the end APPLICATION TO LEAVE THE VILLAGE DENIED Sneaking into the woods, sneaking into the woods EKKKKKKK PANT PANT SQUEALLLL Leaving the woods, leaving the woods DING DING DING DING There is a monster in the village all go hide under your houses Scratching scratch scratch Red paint on all the doors Why would they do this? A note is passed to the elders Lucius; I am sorry I snuck into the woods please don?t be mad, then end signed Lucius OHHHH AHHHHH lets all turn and look at him Wedding night for blind girls sister Little boys run in, there in the village! Party stops Lots of skinned dead animals found They want us to leave this place! Lucius fears blind girl will be hurt by creatures she cant see sits on her porch Blind woman: Out of all the porches in all the village you chose mine Lucius; How did you know I was here? Blind woman: I saw your color out the window Lucius; But your Blind woman: NO I WONT TELL YOU YOUR COLOR Lucius; But I Blind woman: STOP ASKING YOU WILL NEVER FIND OUT EVEN AT THE END OF THIS MOVIE Lucius; Damn Blind woman: Will you dance with me at our wedding Lucius; WHY CANT I EVER TALK YOU ARE STEALING THIS DAMN MOVIE I AM THE STAR I AM THE STAR AND YES I WILL DANCE WITH YOU AT OUR WEDDING Back at the council meeting did you hear Lucius is marrying the blind girl? Retarded man visits Lucius Lucius; I know your sad I stole the only woman who couldn?t see how ugly you are but UCK UCK OUCH FLOOR Retarded son its time for church retarded man: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEH (covered n blood) Someone in the village is hurt spread out we must find them Blind girl runs with a Cain and a hand out in front of her to Lucius house almost trips over body Step away form the body daughter Blind woman: NO DADDY NO, I CANT SEE HIS COLOR! Blind woman: Father you are a member of the elders and I wana go get medicine for Lucius Well ok you convinced me, but first come with me so I can show you something Hunny Blind woman: Yes papa don?t scream Blind woman: Um? Just try not to scream Blind woman: Oooookkkk? Blind woman: AHHHHHHHHH it?s a creature! No its not it?s a costume There are no creatures we just wana make sure you all stay here and don?t run away that way we all stay cousins. Now go through the woods with 2 guys and when you get to the road leave them to wait for you while you hurry to down and do not tell people where your from and take this list with you. 10 minutes later The creatures will take pity on you because your blind, but they will kill me so. LATERZ! Blind chick all alone in the woods standing in a field of berries of the forbidden color Wonder if that is Lucius color, I bet it is dammit, but I will never know? errr Ok this is where we get twisted so lets do the last 30 minutes in like 30 seconds shall we? Retarded man gets sent to quite room, finds a costume of a creature, puts it on try?s to kill blind lady in the woods and then dies. Blind lady somehow finds the road gets to the end finds a wall and climbs it When she gets to the other side a security guard stops her Hey you cant climb that wall that?s an wildlife preserve Blind woman: Please please please make haste please please Ok ok ok ok ok M. SHALM MCKINGHT whatever guest appearance. Let me just help you back over the wall into the wildlife preserve FLASH BACK FLASH BACK Blind woman?s daddies had his papa killed in the 70?s and is a billionaire and so he locked them in this preserve to live with out violence and they think its like 1728 NO MONSTER NO ALIENS NO FUN!
This has been a me presentation, thank you!
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freddurgan
Techgnostic
Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2950636 - 08/01/04 12:18 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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holy shit that was funny as hell.
Blind woman: STOP ASKING YOU WILL NEVER FIND OUT EVEN AT THE END OF THIS MOVIE
*clap*
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Crestfallen
some kindasomethin'
Registered: 07/23/04
Posts: 324
Last seen: 17 years, 4 months
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2950997 - 08/01/04 03:55 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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HAHAHA! I saw this movie last night. I thought it was interesting. About as interesting as a snail. I literally started to doze off, the only thing keeping me awake was my gf next to me. All the hype on TV is total b.s. I stood in line for 20 mins going to see this thing. I love movies, but this one just lacked many qualities that I enjoy in a movie. I imagined if a plane flew over the preserve and the visulization of what they would be saying is more entertaining than the whole movie.
-------------------- The above statement is completely fictional and composed solely for the purpose of entertainment.
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Anonymous
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2961749 - 08/03/04 08:24 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Now that more of you have seen it.... BUMP!
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Dankman
Headphone Wizard
Registered: 06/24/02
Posts: 2,660
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2962000 - 08/03/04 09:45 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Why would the elders keep a suit in the quiet room when they were supposed to be locked in the shed?
When Lucious was painting the poles and stepped out into the woods he immediately saw a creature(elder in a suit) How did they know where he would cross the boundary?
How did they make those noises out in the woods? "We created them"
How does the retard find the blind girl? He waits until she is in the middle of the bad color of course. The retard wasn't smart enough to only find her in the forbidden color like the stories said. The retard was also making growling animal sounds that weren't possible for a human to make.
-------------------- "There was a dirty rainbow coming out of the fucking toilet" - 40 Oz.
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unbeliever
Yo Daddy!
Registered: 05/22/04
Posts: 5,158
Loc: Gallifrey
Last seen: 15 years, 11 days
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2962117 - 08/03/04 10:10 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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The film was unfortunately hyped as a some kind of slasher/monster movie. It is nothing of the sort. I still enjoyed it because it was well done, interesting and kinda artsy. The acting felt more like a play than a movie, but once you get used to it, it does work pretty well. This isn't my favorite MNS movie or anything, but I thought it was worth the price of a movie ticket if you enjoy his kind of suspense movies.
-------------------- Happiness is a warm gun...
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AVShroomer
LSD enthusiast
Registered: 05/19/03
Posts: 832
Last seen: 26 days, 22 minutes
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: ]
#2962130 - 08/03/04 10:12 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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that movie sucked
-------------------- 'It's not a war on drugs its a war on personal freedom' >**My Trip Journal**<
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MOTH
Wild Woman
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: The village WARNING SPOILERS [Re: AVShroomer]
#2962880 - 08/04/04 01:25 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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I was never really looking forward to seeing the Village to begin with, since Signs really disappointed me. My husband wants to see the Village though, so I guess I'll eventually end up watching it.
p.s. I got MAJOR deja vu while writing this post.
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