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freeofthought
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masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors
#16474569 - 07/03/12 11:08 AM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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For years I never understood why I lacked the motivation and self discipline of others. Was something wrong with my moral fiber? Recently after doing some reading its starting to make more sense...
Ive been a compulsive masturbator...and had severe anxiety, since the onset of puberty. Sometimes I would masturbate 20 times a day. All day at school, all day at work, even on dates with girls Id just look forward to getting home as soon as possible so that I could masturbate. I didnt even bother pursuing girls anymore cuz they couldnt get me off as well as I could and I didnt have to have a personality of any sort to score with myself.
In addition to being a compulsive masturbator ive also been a compulsive drug user since about puberty. Between the two I think I pretty much killed my drive in life, and did so by my own doing only seeking immediate gratification.
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the problem with too much If you begin looking forward to getting home only to play with yourself all night long, then maybe masturbating is not so good for you. After all, the fact that you're looking forward to basically sleeping with yourself is stopping you from meeting other people, namely women.
That's right; and even if you do go out with the boys on Friday night (I'm referring to your friends, not your testicles), you won't feel inclined to approach all the beautiful women. Why?
Well 1) your testosterone levels are lower so you're more serene and not very inclined to approach women and 2) you know that you'll be home alone in about three hours so you can stroke and choke your penis at will. why are you doing it? Even if you are in a relationship, you might masturbate -- and that too is absolutely normal, although your woman might think and feel otherwise. But do you even know why you masturbate if you have a woman who's ready, willing and able in your bed?
Believe it or not, sometimes masturbating is less about sexual thoughts and feelings and more about anxiety. Many men, when they're feeling stressed about work or home life, tend to masturbate as a way to relieve the tension and anxiety.
Now don't get me wrong; of course masturbation is also about sexual frustration. If your woman is not giving it to you enough or not the way you like it, then masturbation is one way to relieve the pent-up sexual aggression trapped inside of you.
Read more: http://www.askmen.com/dating/love_tip_60/92_love_tip.html#ixzz1za0iZQpx
This article discusses more on the science of it:
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Has anyone reading this noticed a correlation between giving up porn and reduced social anxiety?
Due to a search engine coincidence, I have been listening to the agonies and ecstasies of recovering porn addicts for several years. Over and over, a common pattern appears: As users manage to abstain from porn and cut way back on masturbation, their desire to connect with others surges. So does their confidence, their ability to look others in the eye, their sense of humor, their perception of their "manliness," their concentration, their optimism, their judgment, their attractiveness to potential mates, and so forth. Even those formerly suffering from social anxiety are more often than not emboldened to explore new avenues for social contact: smiling and joking with work colleagues, online dating, meditation groups, nightspots, and so forth. In some cases it takes months, but often the shift is so rapid that it catches them by surprise. (I'm not implying that social anxiety is solely due to porn use, or that extroversion is a sign of its absence. I'm merely wondering whether, for some, more careful management of sexual desire might be surprisingly beneficial.)
In Addiction as an Attachment Disorder, Philip J. Flores makes the point that one can't attach in a normal, or even therapeutic, relationship while one is attached to an addiction. By the same token, the best support for avoiding relapse is solid relationships with others—and the ability to form them at will.
Why might a porn addict be obliged to address his compulsion in order to form, or restore, real relationships? Psychiatrist Norman Doidge suggests that the intense stimuli (high dopamine) of today's porn hijacks and rewires "brain real estate" that would otherwise be devoted to making social ties rewarding. (The Brain That Changes Itself, p. 109) Actual people become less rewarding; fake people become far more enticing. In this case, size does matter, namely, the amount of brain that lights up. Ceasing the compulsive behavior frees the brain to restore its normal priorities.
Interestingly, people whose habits cause continuous over-stimulation of their reward circuitry with high dopamine—drug users, for example—often feel anxious or depressed the rest of the time. This is largely due to abnormally low dopamine (or low sensitivity to dopamine due to a decline in D2 receptors) between the highs. Rats that have been bingeing on sugar show signs of anxiety and brain changes (decreased dopamine). And mice exposed to protracted elevated dopamine later behaved like they were depressed in response to stress. When one is anxious or depressed, socializing can feel like too much of an effort.
Several studies show that social anxiety is associated with low dopamine or decreased sensitivity. Also see this study about the link between dopamine instability and social anxiety.
All addictions cause a decline in dopamine (D2) receptors, which is a major aspect of desensitization.
•First question: What's one primary biological difference between dominant and submissive primates? Dominant primates have higher levels of dopamine D2 receptors. They were not born with higher levels of D2 receptors, rather "becoming" a dominant male caused the increase. •Inducing addiction in these same primates resulted in the same low levels of D2 receptors in all the males •Second question: During rebooting, are reported increases in confidence, sociability, and motivation related to regaining dopamine D2 receptor levels? Is excessive masturbation to Internet porn leading to social anxiety in some individuals?
Dopamine surges during sexual arousal and drops after climax. Do some people masturbate so frequently that their reward circuitry is unable to return to homeostasis between orgasms? Are they suffering from chronically low dopamine (or low response to dopamine)—making social anxiety more likely? It's important to realize that masturbation frequencies in modern Western society may have little resemblance to our hunter-gatherer ancestors (see WEIRD Masturbation Habits).
If not masturbation, then heavy porn use can certainly lead to a decline in dopamine and dopamine receptors in some brains. All addictions, including behavioral addictions such as pathological gambling and Internet gaming, cause a measurable decline in dopamine signaling. If you have a porn addiction, you have what we call a numbed pleasure response or desensitization, which means low dopamine signalling. (See: Porn Then and Now: Welcome to Brain Training and Intoxicating Behaviors: 300 Vaginas = A Lot of Dopamine to understand the mechanisms.)
Once the brain becomes less sensitive to dopamine, it "becomes less sensitive to natural reinforcers" such as the "pleasure of seeing a friend, watching a movie, or the curiosity that drives exploration." —Nora Volkow, Director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse
Hardcore, ever-novel Internet porn is mightily compelling—for the same reason as crack and Krispy Kreme donuts. These stimuli are like nothing our ancestors' brains had to cope with as humans evolved. Yet the primitive limbic system mistakes them for things so "valuable" that it urges us to seek more and more of them—even when they cause hangovers and withdrawal symptoms.
As with drugs and alcohol, "too much" is different for everyone. However, for some, the vulnerability of the brain's reward circuitry in combination with Internet porn means that pursuit of sexual stimulation has become compulsive pursuit of sexual stimulation. That is a problem because compulsions, remember, get in the way of forming rewarding relationships. In short, it may be that balanced masturbation habits are more important for our psychological health than generally recognized.
The challenge:
- No more masturbating (baby steps...cutting it back to once a day first so I dont get all agro and weird)
- No more stimulants (not that I do many anymore) but also including methylone, mdma, caffeine, coca tea, etc in this.
- Talk to more beautiful strangers (to get comfortable with it)
- Limiting computer, tv and cellphone gaming/internet use.
- Keeping myself occupied on productive things (art, fitness, socializing, diy projects)
Edited by freeofthought (07/03/12 12:42 PM)
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought] 1
#16480344 - 07/04/12 01:01 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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Stay away from porn. You can't see what your unconscious is doing with it, assuming you have "ordinary" consciousness.
You're destroying your taste and pushing away the girls that look like Her, the one for you.
Most of these girls in porn are SOOO gross.
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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freeofthought
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: circastes]
#16480367 - 07/04/12 01:06 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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Im actually not a big porn guy though. I have a photographic memory and masturbate to girls I see in reality during the day.
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#16480401 - 07/04/12 01:12 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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That's not so bad then actually, hehe.
The sexual experience is an outlet for you, perhaps? We are all repressed in this age, due to the Christian upbringing that didn't let all the energy go to the navel. The area is starving. Despite how good we think sex is, we've seen nothing yet.
Sexual release can release all kinds of other tensions. Are you dealing with anger, sadness? These can be diverted to that region and expressed.
The worst thing, and I mean the worst thing, is if you don't stabilise, naturalise, before you get into a bed with a woman, if you're a sex "enthusiast" in this way. It was worse for me because I was obsessed with porn - actual women as images recreatable in your mind's eye is far, far healthier than moving pixels of disgusting women on a flat screen. Anyway, I couldn't get it up, despite loving this person. All that masturbation really wrecked me.
hey, you may just be a "sexual being" or have more of a psychic make-up leading you towards sexual exploration than others...
The body and mind are just saying, "awaken this side of you!"
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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freeofthought
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: circastes]
#16480419 - 07/04/12 01:15 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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I did not have a christian upbringing, I had an aetheist upbringing.
The problem is I have depleted my receptors to the point that I see no need to bother pursuing a mate and I want to have that drive back to pursue healthy relationships. I want to be able to have small talk, meet people, and feel a mental reward for it rather than feeling "why bother, i wanna get outta here so I can go home and masturbate"
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#16480458 - 07/04/12 01:23 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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Yeah but you're in USA right? The culture is based on Christian values, and it's in the American psyche. You certainly are better off with an atheist upbringing, but I bet the energy still doesn't flow right, especially tell-tale of this is chronic masturbation.
Yeah don't get into a relationship without sexual feelings powering at least some of it. It will be unstable.
Hmm. I think I know your pridicament, I've been there.
Perhaps start with extended relaxation?
Tell your consciousness, while lying in a preferably darkened room, that you want to release any tensions, and you want to release them reasonably slowly as to be pleasurable.
...if you get all the tension out at once, it will create a different (but more managable) tension in its place.
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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freeofthought
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: circastes]
#16480540 - 07/04/12 01:44 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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I'll give that a try. most of it is just an outlet for stress/anxiety/tension for me.
I take it all out in masturbation.
When I stop masturbating I often become easily agitated and frustrated.
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#16480916 - 07/04/12 02:55 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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You seem to have made it the ONLY outlet for these energies, such that they become very aware of themselves when they are not being expressed, then.
Keep doing new stuff, things you wouldn't expect someone like yourself to do. You will open whole new horizons for yourself and suddenly see how to release all the tensions and be on your way.
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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freeofthought
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: circastes]
#16480967 - 07/04/12 03:05 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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Ive been using art as a means these past few days.
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#16495551 - 07/07/12 02:52 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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Awesome.
I'm going to get into music and some other interests soon. My interests have been so narrow because of my confused mindset.
Relaxation... dreamy, music-enhanced relaxation where images, shapes and calm situations appear in the mind's eye, is incredibly rebalancing for me.
In a natural consciousness, reality becomes one's self-expression. A whole new vista of possibilities of expression within appear within that... your whole life can become an intense interest. The way you move your body, the way you look around corners, greet people, all becomes an artistic expression...
Surely such problems as ours will quickly vanish in such a powerful place, perhaps being released in mere seconds and freeing us.
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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tito123


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: circastes]
#16497419 - 07/07/12 11:24 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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yourbrainonporn.com
and
http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/
I went 5 weeks but didn't notice too much for some reason. I'll probably start again soon.
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usulpsychonaut


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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#16546031 - 07/17/12 05:43 PM (11 years, 7 months ago) |
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20 times a day is rather allot. I'd say if you become celibate you will still suffer anxiety though. I doubt that you'll obtain any pick up skills or a personality from cutting back on masturbation. I purified my mind and lasted about 7 months with no masturbation, my anxiety remained and I still had little to say to a woman. Now that I use cannabis every day masturbation just is, like everything else.
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egodeathflux
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: freeofthought]
#17342737 - 12/06/12 06:03 AM (11 years, 2 months ago) |
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I can't masturbate due to opiate use.. It just takes FOREVER and 9/10 I fail to finish the job anyway. Been going weeks without any release, on methadone so think this is gonna be a long term thang..
I like jacking it as much as the next man, but the last few months it just hasn't happened, maybe once per month if that. I'm sure it's the opiates, but I'm not feeling any increase in sex drive, just maybe have to buy larger underwear to encase my swollen sack/boys in the barracks.
Opiates really are bad kids, they don't tell you about the battleship sized, granite consistency shits or the complete demolition of sexual performance/motivation. As if there weren't enough negative consequences to being a dumb-ass dope fiend.
myself.
-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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EternalCowabunga
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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: egodeathflux] 1
#17345853 - 12/06/12 05:52 PM (11 years, 2 months ago) |
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Ever since I quit masturbating, my confidence keeps growing. I've masturbated maybe 4 or 5 times in the last year. My testosterone is through the roof and I make more effort to talk to girls. Also I have way more energy and I have no problem getting it up..
Now let me tell you how it used to be.. I got to the point where I needed Viagra just to get a semi boner, I was masturbating every day for 10 years and eventually I just drained my balls. The first time I had sex with a woman I couldn't get it up, I had to turn a porno on. I was also more intimidated by girls in the past.
Try and quit for 3 weeks and see if there are any changes... 1 year later and I'm still constantly feeling changes.
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ChiefGreenLeaf

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Re: masturbation, anxiety and rebuilding dopamine receptors [Re: EternalCowabunga]
#17357673 - 12/08/12 09:05 PM (11 years, 2 months ago) |
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This thread is got some true wisdom. I can totally relate. The best thing I have found for re-sensitizing (is that even a word?) is lots of exercise and MEDITATION
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