Posted by shandor0501 (06/25/13 12:54 PM)
Thanks Fardin, you summed it up perfectly; the ego, consciousness, acceptance and love :)
Posted by Blondiee (06/02/13 04:37 PM)
I can't really explain it, but this story of yours has made some things pretty clear to me in life. I can't put my finger on what exactly, but I thank you for sharing this. I haven't been on a psychedelic trip with shrooms before, but I'm excited to. I think the world is a beautiful place and that everybody needs to accept and love one another. But you have to know who you are, before you can truly understand other people and the life around you. You're story has touched me, thank you so much for sharing it and opening up to all of us.
Posted by Fardin (05/21/13 07:07 AM)
When I'm tripping, I feel like I am it. Not the egoic "I", but the one in whom the first thought popped up and created this whole light and magic show. In that state, there is nothing but pure bliss and eternal love.

When I come down and my egoic construct comes back online, the first thing it wants to do is get back "there". But then, I realize somehow I am already that. It is just the perception through an egoic construct that makes me think I am not it.

But then, "it" (for lack of a better word) cannot be just me as the egoic construct. It is the sum total of all of us, you and I all the people, plants, animals, atoms, molecules in the universe. Which then brings us to why bother with all this, right? When "it" is already perfect and realized. This is probably the million dollar question, and the beauty of it is that there is no right or wrong answer.

It is what you and I make of it, so I'll share what I have made of it.

I have the hunch that the egoic construct that I am is the sum total of all the myriad ways in which my individuated consciousness has expressed itself over aeons.

For the sake of logical thought, I assume that I have been on a cosmic journey from the center of the universe to this planet, and maybe I stopped and experienced life on other planets on my way here. When my individuated consciousness (the soul?) first arrived on earth, it had to start from the bottom, as a plankton and level up like in a game. I think us humans are missing out on something important. We just don't get to be in a human body just like that.

At the end of the day, the atoms and molecules are kept bound to shape your human body by that force, but it requires my and your consciousness to participate in the dance. And before we could inhabit human bodies, we had to start with simpler life forms, less complex organisms. Plankton, Amoeba, etc... all the way up the chain of evolution.

Which means that if you and I have a human body today, we have been able to dance with nature, survive, learn and now this human experience is the pinnacle of all the evolution we have made as individuated consciousness. So, while it appears that there is a lot of stupidity going on around us, we have all reached this part of the game - the human level. But we are just asleep and conditioned for the most part. Now, we all know that physical evolution stopped some time ago, but I don't think evolution ever stops. The next phase is the evolution of the mind.

And just like the dinosaurs lost the game, I suspect some may not level up, some might take a bit more time, and some are just ripping it at warp speed, thanks in large part to the drugs. The end game? That we can have the same God consciousness, while inhabiting a body - human or otherwise.

I believe that when I registered my first thought as individuated from the whole, the whole saw in me a potential, and since then it has been helping me realize that potential. The cherry on the cake is that in this game, thanks to our own minds in which we construct our world, we can have a unique view or perspective which noone else has. And "it" can look through my mind, through my eyes and go... hmmm... interesting take on creation this one has. And to me, that is just really cool.

This perspective is what I create my world with. It is not "the way", it is not right or anything like that. But it is "right" for me. And maybe this is what we are all looking for. Our place in the sun.

Why did we bother with it all? Simply growth and evolution. The one being is already perfect as it is, it does not change or evolve. But we reflect it back to itself, we are its mirrors. It takes pleasure in knowing itself as such. I think this is the gist of the Garden of Eden myth. It is the archetype of the loss of innocence - our birth into individuated consciousness out of that sea of pure bliss. The way Adam and Eve are set up are pretty funny actually. I mean, for the illusion to be perfect, a good old solid story of good versus evil had to be concocted for them to believe it.

It's metaphorical of course, but I think God saw Adam and Eve were going nowhere just sitting around on their ass all day, enjoying life. They were not going to look deeper into existence, they were not going to grow and learn, which means that God could not use them to have creation reflect back to itself. So, they were made to believe that they were thrown out of the garden, they went through an archetypal loss of innocence. They are us, leaving the cosmic soup, having to fend for ourselves and learn. But we were never really left behind, we were always being guided, we were never lost.

The compulsion we have to seek enlightenment, to be one with the universe, etc... is a way for us to find that innocence again. It's cool to go back home once in a while, but I think the action is here. This is where it's at. In due time, we will be able to recreate that same element of comfort and innocence wherever we are. We'll bask in it for a while, until we get lazy and have to have our groove shaken again. And so it goes...

So who am I? I am just God seeing itself as Fardin, seeing and experiencing itself through the eyes of Fardin. And every once in a while, Fardin gets to see creation through the eyes of God. Pretty neato, eh? :)

Oh well, that went on for longer than I thought...
Posted by Hippie Vehicle (05/21/13 12:13 AM)
What I am thinking is.. whatever allows me to be conscious retains the ability to have experiences through me, even when the "I" no longer knows what it is. 
Posted by Hippie Vehicle (05/20/13 11:59 PM)
Ah, beautiful thought Fardin! 
Posted by Fardin (05/20/13 07:08 PM)
There is noone to forgive you, lol! :) Just kidding...
Posted by Schopenhauer (05/20/13 05:47 PM)

Indeed...who is the Master who makes the grass green? Existence exists. Experience is experienced. Non-existence doesn't EXIST. It truly IS the Mystery of Mysteries. Isn't it FUCKING AWESOME! (forgive the profanity!)
Posted by Fardin (05/18/13 04:46 PM)
I have a question for you. Who is it that is aware that there is noone to experience? Try toying with this thought on your next trip. Might get pretty wild though. :P

Posted by SlowJabroni (05/17/13 10:38 PM)
Sounds like you had an ego death.  I had the same feelings coming down from an 8th of shrooms, so much happiness when you come back after you think you've been gone forever.  You really realize how amazing and beautiful normal life is after you've been stuck in that sort of trippy seemingly eternal state of nothingness.  Sometimes that's just what you need so that you don't take your own life for granted.