My God, that's no trip... that was a fucking adventure! And I applaud you for making it out alive. I've heard of people going through those kind of trips and end up doing something very unfortunate that wrecks them in the end.
It's been a couple of years since your initial post, but I'm hoping that you're continuing on your newly defined path. And I hope you're treating you're friend Stacy a lil better. It seems like she was there for you and didn't abandon you even when shit started to get weird.
A little theory I've made up for those who commit suicide or harm themselves is the exact reason why you chose the light instead of tunneling back into your own mind. Those who cannot deal with the thoughts that seem to torment them inside turn to physical torment to get their mind off of the thoughts. I call it "An Escape into Hell". I'm still trying to wrap my mind around your method of sinking into the dark waters; naturally, I have an inclination to just "deal with it" instead. But I'm wondering if there is a way to die and be reborn (not literally of course).
"Ran straight into the fire and came out the other side"
There's something about that makes me wonder and I'd hope that you check back up on this so I could ask you how this was done... or maybe it's not as simple as that? All I know is my pscyhe is vibing with that in an odd way that I cannot forcibly control and perhaps that is where my journey will take me to next.
This story has given me a lot to think about for my own well-being and personal strengthening, and for that I have to thank you!