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Shrooms and a campfire

the magic evades all understanding once again!

I aquired 4 grams of gold caps from a friend at school after christmas break. I have been on several trips before and all were amazing experiences.  I had never eaten 4 grams so I wanted this trip to be set up for positive results.  So the story begins.

    Saturday night, a couple of friends and myself were trying to decide the best way to spend a cold winters night.  I had my shrooms and they had some smelly funky dank ass herb.  As we pondered what to do somebody came up with the idea of a bonfire.  It sounded good to me right?  Tripping around a campfire just sounds great.  So a couple of phone calls and pizzas later we find an appropiate place to commence our illicit activities, my friends backyard.  When the fire got rolling i plopped three medium sized shrooms onto what was left of the pizza and chowed down, i couldnt taste them at all.  So as i sat and waited for the first signs of a budding trip, i told my friends to smoke.  I didnt want to be around a bunch of sober people when the trip really got rolling, so they did.  Now we all were sitting around the fire talking about god knows what when i got chills that engulfed my enitre body.  They almost seemed to move me immediately into a mild trip.  It was uncomfortable at first.  I kept thinking this was a bad place to come up.  A couple of buddies i was with wern't really experienced with being around people tripping.  They kept looking at me longer then was comfortable for me and it made me feel out of place with everyone.  So i decided to retreat into my mind until i am at a comfortable point in my trip.  I pulled a blanket over my head and closed my eyes.  Although i wasn't tripping to hard yet i had some amazing visions in my mind,  a train coming around a bend and headed straight for me.  It seemed very real yet i wasn't scared at all.  It was while under the blanket that i felt comfortable and ready to embrace this experience.  I usually have very spiratual experiences on shrooms but this one was off the charts.  I felt comfortable around everyone so i came back to reality.  I was staring at the fire trying to decide if the wierd directions the flames seemed to be jumping out at was normal.  I had this thought in my head that i had done this before.  Like deja vu.  I thought i had tripped around a fire before but i knew i hadn't.  It happens to me quite often while tripping i cant explain it with words very well.  The two people who were making me somewhat uncomfortable left to go do other things. That left the original gang of people who planned the whole night.  My memory fails for what happened next but it is not anything of great import.  I remember feeling very emotional towards human pain and suffering in the world.  I didnt know it but the world was slowly opening up before my eyes.  My three stoned friends decided they were hungry and wanted to go to hy-vee to get some food.  I thought that was a great idea so we packed up into the car and headed to hy-vee.  This is when the trip jumped up a level.  As we were driving everything seemed to be dancing on the side of the roads.  The lights were bright and twinkly.  It was wonderful.  As we were pulling up to a stop light a selected spot on the road seemed to be out of movement with the rest of the road.  It was a funky perception.  We got to hy-vee and i was wondering how i was going to be able to present myself to the public since i was finding it hard to walk and my eyes were black holes.  My friend asked if I wanted to wait in the car with him and listen to music. It seemed like a better idea so that was what i did.  We talked about the visuals i was having but more importantly we talked of leaving, going nowhere in particular just leaving the redundant meaningless lives we were living.  It was stated in a bit simpler way.

Me: I just wanna leave man
Friend: Where?
Me: Idk just leave u kno what i mean?
Friend: hell yea i kno what you mean

It was an important part of the night to me.  So we got back to the campfire eventually and we roasted smores, although they ate theirs i just watched mine burn and melt into the fire with great joy.  So after a while i thought it was time to step the trip up another level so decided to eat the rest of the shrooms i had. (4 grams seemed like alot so i was being cautious and taking my time) I had 1 big ass motha fucka and another medium sized guy left.  I ate the medium sized guy and the trip jumped up another level fairly quickly. The world became very clear and alive all around me.  The sounds of the city and life around us filled my body and took into a deep state or peace and joy for everything and everyone.   Now with the trip going so well i was fearless in my next step to eat the big shroom and smoking a bowl of grass, i can't remember which came first but it was these actions that were utimately the downfall of this trip.  I can't remember feeling the high from the weed at all but i remember have a decrease in the visuals and overall beauty of everything after smoking.  I remember having increasing depressing thoughts that i quickly associated with the weed, (weed sometimes makes me depressed)  I tried to push through this but i know how the mind can go from ecstasy to downright depression in a second and i felt there was nothing i could do.  There was a moment in all this where my sense of hearing became extremely acute.  Something that i could never normally hear was heard as if it was right in my ear.  My auditory perception was extremely fucked too.  What happened next evades understanding to this day.  I kept having this feeling as if my being (spirit if you will) was rising without my body.  Then the world fell apart.  I felt my mouth moving and i heard words coming out but they made no sense to me.  Time was no longer even an idea.  The world around me was fragmented into light and shapes that i could not understand, but i wasnt trying to understand it i did not even kno something had gone wrong.  Next moment reality came back and i was  toppled over in my chair on its side on the ground.  My friends were standing over me asking me if i was alright and acting extremely frightened. I had no idea what was going on, i thought i had gone completely mad.  I dont know what happened next but eventually i got back into my chair upright and the world fell apart once again.  This time when i came back to reality my friend was acting seriously scared and it frightened me.  I felt like if i talked it would happen again so i just sat in silence.  The trees started to take on a demonic nature but i thought fuck that and they quickly turned back into trees.  I was sweating quite hard at this point and felt extremely exhausted but i was determined to just sit through this and wait for my trip to return to a comfort level.  I picked up my guitar and played a a chord thing that sounded beautiful. everyone was watching me play guitar and i felt a little better but not much. There was a bright flash of light at one point after this i dont kno how much time had elapsed and i dont even kno if i am stating the correct order of events.  The light seemed only to shine on us around the campfire and as quickly as it came it left.  It was rather odd and a little bit frightening.  When i felt good and ready we decided to leave, it was early in the morning and the rents would probably be calling soon.  I was still tripping balls.  There was a texture on everything like little transparent concave dots.  And at times everything was pixallized. The rest of the night i felt very at odds with the mushrooms. I got home and was by myself.  The walls in my basement were breathing violently.  Fractal like patterns seemed to grow in my vision but i did not feel like the trip was embracing me so i did not embrace it.  I spent the rest of it lying in my bed tossing and turning trying to make sense of what had happened not being tormented nor enjoying the insane visuals i was having in my mind.  My ego split into 5 or 6 at one point and my thought went through a series different voices all controlled by me.  At times it was a struggle to keep from going into a loop but when that happened i would just forbid any thought what so ever.  Easier said then done of course but i have practice with meditating.  Eventaully sleep came over me. I awoke feeling extremely good and very peaceful.  When i talked to my friends that day they said i had some sort of seizure or muslce spasms when i had lost reality. I fell over in my chair shaking and making grunting sounds for about ten seconds.  When it happened again it lasted 5 seconds.  I have never heard of that happening before and it still doesnt make sense to me.  No lasting effects from that which makes me believe it was not a seizure and because of how fast it happened. I blame it on the weed but the last big mushroom probably didnt help either

first trip report sorry for how long it is but there was alot to say and this was mostly for me anyways hope you enjoyed!

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