Shroomin At Hempfest!

(its a long read, but well worth your time...i beleive my trip to be very exciting and different.)


Im an open minded person to any kind of drug.

therefore, when shrooms came around, i was glad to munch away on them.
first time i shroomed.
nothing really, it was a bad bunk batch which me, along with 4 other friends felt nothing after each ingesting personal eighths.

second time though.
would be more epic then ever.

Hempfest (olympia, WA) 2007.
(mind you i had planned on getting realllly realllly stoned...)

i show up, and begin lookin at pipes when all the sudden a kid i met a grip of years ago taps me on the back and whispers the question...
"You wanna shrooooooom mannnn?"

so we walk a mile to his car, and i buy an eighth along with my friend T.
They were called Close Cap African Cabensis i beleive.

They were orangish/off white/copperish looking, very large compared to the first batch of shrooms i had ever seen.
i had a good amount of stems and an overwhelmingly amount of caps.

Me and T cannot wait and we begin to snack.
The kid who had sold us the shrooms began to laugh a little as he noticed us ingesting our eighths.
then he questioned at why we were eating them all at once, and then AFTER our bags were empty,
he informed the shrooms to be very potent, and that basically we were going to fry like no other.


25 minutes: ive got a body high, my legs feel like jello, bit of blurred vision, enhanced hearing, echoes...
35 minutes: shapes and patterns seem to pop out of nowhere, faces melt, the sky turns in an articles of a newspapers...
45 minutes: i began to sweat a lot, my voice is deep and robotic, my legs shrink, the sidewalk and grass become vast, wavy oceans.

Lost Sense Of Time: I being gettin a stomach ache, i run down the streets alone in Olympia, and into a parking garage knowing very well im going to puke and want to be where nobody can see me. Im running up level after level of parking garage hysterically. a purple and pink bench appears in the middle of nowhere, where i sit, and began to vomit.

My vomit comes in 3 surges. I notice my puddle of vomit morphing...it begins to rise, like a loaf of bread, all the while turning a brighter and brighter shade of lime green with liiiiiittttle tiny blue specs in it. Still rising, my pile of puke morphs into what i would call about a 6 foot tall, lime green/speckled blue mushroom which stands in front of myself. I sit (on this bench which i eventually found to have never even been there at all) and stare at the horrifiengly awesome site in front of me, and then shriek in terror. The mushroom statuette hits the cement wall, and liquifies into a puddle of lime green again.

Wanting to clean up and see myself in a mirror, i head back to hempfest and find a porta-potty.
I step in, look in the mirror and im not even there.
my reflection ceases to exist.
being in the porta potty, i realize i need to releive myself.

baffled, i stand for what seems 5-10 minutes trying to remember HOW to urinate.
then i notice out of the corner of my eye.
a peice of toilet paper which is fluttering in a the breeze.

it doesnt stay paper for long though.
it morphs into a human hand (nothing odd about the hand, just a hand)
and then begins to pull on me.
then one on my adjascent side.
and then from the kneecaps up, im being groped/surrounded and wrapped by hands.

fleeing the porta-potty.
i run outside frantically searching for my friend T.

emberessingly enough, and my friend B told me about this later, i got into a strangers car (luckily parked)
and began frantically yelling at the driver for some reason beleiving he had kidnapped my friend T.
luckily B was there to pull me out of that situation before i probably most likely would have been arrested.

(about 4 hours in:)

I begin to calm down.
im still hallucinating.
but not with such intensity.

then as i begin to focus on people walking around the grass off in the distance,
i notice a couple people to just...*POOF*...people strolling along, and just turning into clouds of dust...

everytime i would focus on a walking person, they would be gone like that.

then i came to realization, if i were to go walk anywhere, i might go *POOF* as well.

(i dont move for the next hour or so)

i end walking back to my friend B's car.
to find T huddled in the fetile position just hysterically laughing.
The three of us (B being sober and not joining our laughing)
sit there.
and we laugh.
for about 2 hours.


(about 7 1/2 hours in:)

im coming down.
the car ride home reveals the beauty of the setting sun to me.
and all the scenery you see on a daily bases along the freeway.

we get home.
and i purchase 3 packs of smokes.
and an eighth of bud.

and sleep.
(some very odd dreams that night of semi-trucks with numbers and dates flying out the back of them, and jungles of animals ive never known to exist...)

that...was my horrificly exciting trip.

-tyla!