Tears, Laughs, Unity.

Age: 18
Weight: 160
Dose: 1.75 g's Dried Cubensis
   
   
    The trip I am about to describe was my second trip ever at the time of ingestion.  It should be noted that while my doseage was only 1.75 g's, the shrooms were the best I've ever found and I happen to be extremely sensitive to psilocybin.

    The place was my work buddy Andy's house, an average size rural home.  Me and my long-time friend Alex had finally managed to get our hands on an eighth of some really crazy looking Cubes.  We each ate our half-eighths on some toast with peanut butter and jelly at around 11:30 PM after which we followed up with a good-sized bowl of some good regs.  About a half hour after this we were still sitting around waiting when Alex said he was feeling kind of "funny".  I hadn't really felt a thing yet and was beginning to think nothing was going to happen (it seems I always think this and yet I'm always wrong) until about 12:45 AM when I looked at Andy's carpet and noticed extremely intricate geometric patterns waving over every inch of it.  By now I was beginning to lose touch with reality a little bit and I believe I said something slightly unintelligible relating to the carpet's movement  like "Your carpet is  funny",  or something really deep and meaningful like that, ha ha.  I decided I didn't want to sit around anymore and got up and walked down his hallway which featured a small square mirror hanging on the right wall near the end right before Andy's bedroom.  I stopped to look at this mirror and noticed that my pupils had grown extremely large making my eyes look like two big black glass beads.  Right after noticing this and laughing to myself a little my friend Alex came up, took one look at my eyes and said something like "Damn you and your bug eyes!"  Almost immediately after he said this we both burst out laughing, harder than I believe either of us ever have...I was rolling on the floor, literally.  After walking past the house some more and seeing the usual hallucinations of pictures moving and other patterns, I came to a stop in the kitchen where a small green plant sat on the windowsill in a pot.  The plant was moving as most plantlife does when tripping but what was different this time was that on the largest leaf which extended from the top of the plant and sort of hung downwards I could make out a face.  The face did not speak or move its features much.  All I could see was that the face seemed to sighing, looking down at me with eyes that screamed of disappointment.  The plant was sad, I knew it, somehow I knew the plant did not like being on the windowsill in the pot there and I knew that it disapproved not of me specifically but of me as a people, of the human race and what we have to done to plants like this one.  I looked down in shame and I remember telling the plant that I was sorry only to see that the face had gone.  After this I went to the living room and sat down on the couch for what I had intended to be only a few minutes.  This is when the trip took a much deeper turn...

    I began thinking extremely hard about everything; mostly about society, space, the afterlife, things that really interest me and that I've always took shrooms with the hope of discovering more information about.  I thought about how much the human race is truly capable of, about how much love and beauty there really is in every person, and about how much of it is repressed and never seen because of our power and money-hungry government.  I took a look at the TV which was on, and a very disturbing series of images and thoughts surged through my brain.  First, I had the image of a huge network of television sets, one in every home, a family in each home wasting their lives away staring at the box in front of them.  At the very top of this network sat a man in a black suit turning dials and laughing to himself, controlling and hypnotizing all who were watching.  I realized that we as people will never be truly free until we rid ourselves of television.  We are all slaves to the big glowing box, we do everything it tells us to...our entire society is based upon the programs which our own government controls.  In other words, they can control what we wear, how we think, what we believe, who we associate with, and a number of other things simply by putting what they want us to know on the set.  And we, the ignorant inhabitants of this country eat it up.  After realizing all that we could do and all that we don't do because of this, I began to cry.  I'm not ashamed to say it, it was an incredibly saddening thought and the fact that so many people don't realize it made me feel lonelier than I ever have in my life.  And then it happened.  I left my body.  My eyes closed, my head rolled to the side and all of my limbs went completely numb.  Yet, I could see the room which I was in.  I could see Andy on the couch near me, half asleep (he hadn't taken any shrooms).  I could see myself, with my head tilted to the right on my shoulder, my eyes closed, and my hands neatly on my lap completely unmoving.  My body looked so incredibly alien for some reason, as if it really wasn't me.  And thats when I came to another realization, one that made all the sadness and loneliness I had previously felt wash away.  In my current bodiless state I knew, somehow I just knew, that every being on this planet is connected and that we are all truly one consciousness.  While this idea is fairly popular and I had known of it long before tripping, it is a different thing to read about an idea than to actually experience it and know that it is true.  I looked at my body again and now a wide sort of ethereal arch was extending out from the top of my head and connecting me to Andy, I saw that from this arch extended a seemingly infinite number of other arches which branched out to a number of other places, probably to other people. I could feel somehow that I had left the individuality of my own being and I had the sense of "rejoining" something much greater.  The closest physical representation I can think of for this is when you see tiny beads of water on a pane of glass slowly moving until they reach other drops, at which time they fuse together to form a larger drop.  The feeling of it is indescribable yet I knew what was happening with a certainty I cannot apply to anything else in my life.  I was experiencing complete bliss, nirvana, if you will.  The moment was somewhat fleeting (or it felt fleeting, I'm not sure if time passed the normal way), and I was returned to my body.  Even though I was deprived of the feeling of oneness I still retained the knowledge I had received and I felt happier than I ever have in my life.  I began to laugh again, only this laugh was much different than before, I kind of scared myself because I didn't find anything funny, I was just so incredibly elated and carefree that it seemed the only way my body could react.  I thought about all the people in the world with their jobs, their PDA's, their appointments, schedules, meetings, families, houses, cars, etc. etc. and I just laughed harder. I knew that none of it was really the way things are.  We create these things to make ourselves feel important, to fit in with the way the people on TV are.  What's sad is that if everyone knew the way things really were, that we are all part of one, that we will all become one in the end, maybe things would be different.  I know they would be.  And this is the thought that keeps me up at night.

Thank you for reading I welcome all comments.