I found myself in austin one weekend, a cool january
night, perfect in any way imaginable. i was piss drunk
at 4 in the afternoon, sober by eight, and out of nowhere
i suggested that we attain some mushrooms.
...they were at the door within 10 minutes. an almost
surreal start to an evening far beyond surrealism.
i ate my personal pile of heavenly fungus and retired to
a bench outside by myself, staring at trees, the moon,
and singing Blackbird enthusiastically. Never before
had i tripped on anything....i had no idea what was
coming my way.
I asked myself, "Am i tripping."
about 2 minutes later i stared into the "soul of the tree" i
thought, and all of the limbs stretched out, reaching and
connecting to every other tree in sight.
i now said to myself in amazment, "i am tripping"
i correlated the tree to life, and of course this enigma of
an existence suddenly made beautifully perfect sense.
i realized that humanity has to be that tree...i must
connect to everything both on my path and off of it.
"thank you tree" i said. the tree understood.
i then hurried inside to see that everyone else had
begun their trips as well. i laughed for hours for no
reason at all. i laughed until my veins pumped
soothing acidic happiness in its purest form.
it was at this time that i noticed a clock, perfectly
centered and almost looming over the room. the time
was 12:22, and after laughing blindly for what seemed
like a good while, i looked back to see it was 12:23.
another life lesson was learned and i promised both
myself and the clock to embrace every minute because
the time that threads itself through life is
malleable...you can distort it to be whatever you like. of
course hallucengens with this process.
"thank you clock," i said. the clock understood and the
room exploded into laughter. i didnt know why they
laughed. i didnt even know they could hear me talking.
i cackled wildly anyway.
i then obtained a glass bottle, some hairspray and a
lighter and headed outside. everybody followed. i
stood on a picnic table doused the inside of the bottle
with hairspray, and slowly poured it out over a flame.
crazy blue flames spread through the bottle and then
fell to the ground only to continue burning in perfect
blue sections. i made an obscure connection between
the fire and my life, and of course thanked the fire after.
everyone gathered atop the table, and looking out into
backyards of amazingly colorful windchimes (i never
knew there were that many windchimes in the world),
we decided that we were surfing the universe. it was
the most fun i had in years.
it was then that i decided to head to 711 with my friend
Jeremy. convinced that i was Dante, and jeremy was
the dead poet virgil, i headed for the door, all grins. my
brother flashed a dollar bill in my face and yelled, "get
me something pretty!" i laughed even more, if that was
because i was exploring the underworld and all, i of
course brought with me paper and pencil to record
everything i saw on my journey. I realized the next
morning that All i wrote was "Day 3:
I cant believe he's driving this machine!"
The floor in 711 was great. Brick patterned and loose
and free and crazy. I stared in amazement and then
looked up to see the most beautiful sight my eyes have
ever held: the candy aisle. it was like willy wonka or
somethign....whatever...it was beautiful. i loved it.
Jeremy, i noticed, was staring thoughtfully into the
donut machine. i approached him and we talked for a
while about how much the inside of it was like heaven...
or at least like heaven should be. he dropped a donut
into a bag and commented on how wonderful life was,
capturing in my opinion the essence of mushrooms...
the simplest things are the most amazing.
i returned home with Dots. The box was the most
colorful thing i could find. A friend was sitting on the
couch with a didgery doo(???), and impersonating mr T
through the tube. "I'm Mr T!! I fell down a pipe. i pity the
fool who stuck in this pipe. im hungry...give my some
soup! let it trickle down the pipe." Both redundantly
brilliant jokes and fresh belly laughter continued for
over an hour. ..we laughed histerically at the same joke
over and over. fantastic.
i fell asleep under the clock happy to be protected by
its knowledge. i woke up refreshed and unable to
believe the person i was before i experienced the
wonder of mushrooms.
nothing i have ever found is better.
take it easy.