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Loss Of Reality
I got a huge urge to crawl under her bed, where I decided I would spend the rest of my trip. I couldn't fit, so I gave up and sat against the wall. After a while, I ended up laying in a corner of her closet. I was totally oblivious to the rest of the world including my friend. I lost all touch with reality and was convinced that all life as we know it was just a dream - that my entire life, all my childhood, and everything never! really happened. I thought that the trip was life now and that I'd never get off it. I could hear my friend in the backround, talking to someone on the phone. I stared at one spot on her wall for what seemed like two hours.
The indentations in the wall danced for me and entertained me. I remember feeling a tear slide down my face while I watched the spots and I was confused because I didn't think I was crying. I heard my friend getting hysterical and screaming something about being stupid. She grabbed my arm and said that we had to leave her house, but I refused to go, because I wanted to wit out the trip in her closet. She screamed repeatedly that she hates me, but I didn't understand why. I closed the closet door so that I wouldn't get anymore interruptions, but I could hear her sobbing loudly. I tried to close my eyes and go to sleep, because whenever I'm drunk or high, I can just fall asleep and wake up to normality. But I couldn't close my eyes without seeimg ! spots danceing all around. It was like no matter where I looked, I couldn't see normal things. Everything was so distorted and out of control. I opended the door and saw Sarah crying. I looked down at her wrists and they were cut and bleeding. I said, " You've cut yourself. Why did you do that?" She cried and screamed at me that we needed to get out of her house. I said I didn't want to leave, so she grabbed a protracted and said that she's kill herself if we didn't go. I shut the door and preceded to stare at the spot on the wall again.
Every so often I would sit up and become aware that I was tripping and that my best friend had slit her wrists. But my mind would tell me that it didn't really happen and I would commmence watching the wall dance. I remember touching my face and feeling like my skin could be pulled right off and wondering why it didn't hurt to pull at it. Everything I touched felt magnitized and intriguing. My toungue and lips didn't seem to be p! art of my body, because I could touch them, but they didn't feel like they were being touched. I was numb to touch all over. My hair was coming out in clumps. I opened the closet door and told my friend that I was going to vomit. She grabbed her wastebasket and I threw up in it four times. She got pretty angry that I had done this to her. I closed the closet door and stared at the wall for a while longer. Suddenly, I had to go to the bathroom and so I just went right there in the closet. I didn't think it would matter because I was living in that reality now, so no one would mind.
I left the closet and found my friend on the phone crying to someone about what was happening. She screamed at me that we had to leave her house, and I was getting off my peak, so I agreed after much pursuation. SHe grabbed my shoes, the wastebasket and we left her house. It felt strange walking outside. I felt like everyone could tell I was tripping and was looking at my soaked pants, b! ut I didn't mind vey much. I felt a desire to find my other friend because I really really wanted off of this trip. Her back door was open, so I went in and found her doing homework in her room. I told her what was happening and that I needed help. I started to cry and grabbed her scissors on the desk and cut my wirst. She screamed and ran to the bathroom for a towel. I started to dry and instantly regretted doing it. She sat me down in the bathroom and made me promise not to move while she got some bandages.
Once I was bandaged up, I told her that my other friend was still loose in the neighborhood, so we went to find her. SHe was crouched on the step of my neighbors house and he was comforting her. We all went inside and talked while my trip went down. Finally, I went home and got yelled at for missing dinner. It was the worst experience of my life.