IRONING A MOUSE

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DUIN! Said the pet store clerk when he saw my hand in mice cage plucking a mice on the head as hard as I could with my finger. I got 3 already and knocked them out cold. He made me leave, so, I left and he was all pissed..Damn, why is he so pissed? I thought it was funny.

Hi, I am MOE. I ate 6 dried grams of my homegrown fat asses. Me and superchink walked to the mall after smoking about a bowl a piece. We were so fucked up. We were all anti social, so we split up and walked through the mall... I had a hard time stuffing down the feeling that everyone knew that I was stoned..I finally got rid of it and treked on....I walked into EVERY store I could and looked at almost everything. Most of it was fuzzy, but I do remember that I went into victoria's secret and picked up some braish looking thing. It was all warped and I had a hard time holding the fucking drink that I just realized that I had been holding all this time...It was superchink's drink. I sat the drink on the floor and went back to the bra.


I forgot I was in public when I held the bra cups on my chest. I looked up and a girl was laffing at me. I handed her the bra, grabbed my drink and left feeling stupid...


I left that store and went into sharper image store with all kinds of electronic gadgets in it. I was lost and felt dizzy. I needed to sit. I saw this kewl looking chair that was all streamlined and thin looking. I plopped down and took a load off. It sure did feel guud. Some kid had a remote that was wired to the chair. I paid no atteniton to him and I almost fell asleep. The stupid kid must have hit a switch, the chair started to vibrate and pulse. This totally took me by surprize.

At the top of my lungs I yelled "EARTHQUAKE"!! and tossed down my drink and jumped up. I ran under a table and waited. I looked around and felt so goddamn stupid I began to tremble. I got up and left quickly. I was wet on one side of my pants, and it looked like I pissed on myself. I ran into superchink who had the shittiest look on his face. "I dont feel right maan" he said..."Tell me fucking about it dude" I said back to him....We walked over to the mens room so that I can go to the automatic hand dryer and dry my pants.. I am drying my pants standing on one leg, and superchink inspects the bag the shrooms were in...

"Damn, MOE, I had acid in this bag before, I think that is what is wrong with us" the stupid korean said. I was like...maaaan, how much acid was in the baaag maaaan? he wouldnt say. A mall security guard crashed into the bathroom and told us to vacate the premisis...We were escorted out and we walked back to my house...


At my house, we were dumb and decided to smoke more weed...BOY I never did acid before and I was seeing ALL kinds of shit..I felt spinny and I heard a high pitched ring in my ears. My washing machine was on. I guess my wife was doing the wash before she decided to go shopping at the factory outlets that were about 1 hr away from were we lived. I was so out of control. Superchink was sitting on my sofa with his feet on it and big boots that were dirty from the walk back home..

I stuck out my hand and said... ... ... ..I couldnt talk!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! I walked over to the chink and grabbed his boots and shoved them on the floor....Oh, sorry dude!! he said..."Fuck you" I said.......I set up the ironing board and turned on the Iron. The dryer had buzzed and I was going to iron my shirts, BOY I was having a BAD trip...BUT I was having a good weed high at the same time. I reached into my cargo pocket and...WHAT THE FUCK, a MOUSE! I pulled a mouse out of my pocket! I was really loosing it.

I looked at the mouse's fur and it was mooving like water...It was all wrinkled. The mouse didnt feel real to me, so I'd thought I'd iron it to get the wrinkles out...I put the mouse on the ironing board and held the tail down with my finger. I was really going to iron the fucking mouse...Chink started laffin hard cause he was staring at me this whole time and walked over and snatched the mice away and put it in his back pack. He was so stoned, we were so stoned. THEN, MY WIFE CAME HOME!



I was busted....that's another story..

MOE