The chicken wing

It all start when my friends Zack and I picked up some shrooms from the park off of some people we know. We bought two grams for 20 dollars, average price for shrooms. The guy we bought them off of picked the two grams off of a giant shroom that the dealer called the chicken wing because it was so huge and it was shaped like a chicken. We had heard only good from the chicken wing shroom, it was supposedly very powerful stuff. On Saturday morning I woke up to go to Zack's house. I got there at about 2 o'clock and we immediately went upstairs to look at the stuff we were about to feast upon. We opened a little tackle box, where he kept most of the drugs he bought. It was locked. For some odd reason the shrooms looked twice as big as they did when we had first bought them which was just fine with us. We went downstairs and ate a few slices of day old pizza and headed for the park. We got to the park at around 3 and went in between two portables of an elementary school to make sure that nobody could see us. We ate them with a piece of stale bagel to make the taste less harsh, which I didn't particularly mind but when Zack ate his piece he was about to gag. He explained to me that it by far the worst thing he had ever eaten in his life and he didn't believe me when I told him it had a distinct and pleasant crunch to it. We're just sitting on the portable steps waiting for something to happen, may I also inform you that this is the first time we had ever done shrooms and we didn't expect the effects of it. Twenty minutes pass and nothing is happening to us so we decides to got to the mall which is five minutes away from where we are. We get to the mall and still nothing is happening so we lost total faith in the chicken wing and we're like this is the worst ten dollars we ever spent in our fuckin lives. We continue walking around in the mall, to record stores, meeting people we know on the way until we go into a sports store. We're trying on the retarded looking winter hats there and Zack looks in the mirror and is shocked to find his pupils almost as big as the green part of his eye. We look in the mirror and our eyes are huge so we say to ourselves this must be kicking in but we're still not feeling anything except for being a little notious and dizzy. We decide to leave the mall and go back to the park. On the way to the park we feel an incredible weight on our legs, like 100 pounds are tied to our legs and its nearly impossible to walk for more that two minutes without breaking a sweat. After a growling five minutes we get to the park and back in between the portables were we beginning to get tired and start to fall asleep. I lay down and stare at the school for about 15 minutes and I began to realize that it's getting twice as big as it was to beginning with and that the ground is getting bigger and smaller as I breath, like the ground is breathing with me. I now know that the shit is kicking in. Zack is almost asleep staring at the portable wall and he later explains to me that he was seeing the white paint of the portable was dripping off of it and he's seeing weird shapes on the ground. We sort of fall out of our beauty sleep and head to the middle of the field were the park is. We're discussing the effects of what we saw when we were falling asleep on the portable steps. Were just laying on the ground and out of nowhere we have this huge urge to get up and spin around in circles while staring at the sky. So Zack and I get up and start spinning violently until we have no control of our bodies and just fall on the floor, and fall hard may I add. We're spinning and falling and for some reason this is incredibly funny to us. Everything we would normally not find funny would be funnier that a monkey taking a shit in a velvet blue hat while eating a plum. After we finished spinning we go to a friend that lives like one minute from the park. We knock on his door and his little brother answers. We ask him if we can use the phone because Zack needed to call his house. We get half way through the door and his mother comes downstairs and starts yelling at us to get out of her house for reasons I wouldn't want to get into right now. Zack is ignoring her and picks up the phone and it falls out of his hands and cracks on the floor because he must of gotten nervous from when our friends mother is yelling at us. We leave the house, well got kicked out of the house, never the less we were out of there and decided to go to my fathers place which was very close to where we were from. On our way, these kids started yelling at us and were like 'What the fuck?!?'. So we try running after them and it was impossible! It was like we were sinking into the ground and our feet were so heavy! So we got to my house. There was nobody home. The house was nearly empty with the only thing of value was a pair of huge speakers which were stolen by my father, a pair of Persian rugs and the drums I had upstairs. There was never anything in the fridge except for a 40 box of eggo waffles that never seemed to run out. The time now is around 5 something if I remember correctly. We pop 2 eggo's in the toaster. The sight of the waffles make us burst into laughter. I open the fridge and take out a piece of the most decrepit cheese you have ever seen in your life, it had teeth marks in them and there were full of black stuff all around it. The sight of the cheese made us laugh even harder. POP, the waffles are ready. We smother a glob of expired margarine on our food and a piece of cheese that was probably alive on it to top it off. We took a bite and it felt like we were taking a bite out of our hands. The waffle felt like it was a part of our hand; it felt like it was a part of us. If freaked us out but became funny afterwards just like everything else. The eggo tasted like nothing, it felt like eating air and no matter how many we ate it just didn't seam to relieve our hunger. I swear I could have eaten 50 and still would have been hungry. We put 2 more in the toaster and went into the living room to watch some television. We turned on the TV and muted it and turned on the radio full blast. We were debating what kind of shit was playing on the radio, pearl jam or creed. If you as me I think it's the same band. This man was horking in some woman's drink on TV and the women was drinking it. As you can tell from my description this was boring shit we were watching so I turned the channel to find out I was pushing the on/off button on the TV because I didn't know the difference between on/off and channel control. So whenever I wanted to change the station I would turn off the television. After a few times I figured out which buttons do what and I had the power to flip channels. We were watching a bunch of garbage but it didn't fail to amuse us. We smelled a burning odour so we ran to the kitchen to find out that our last batch of eggo's were so fucking burnt. We were laughing like it was gonna be out of style the next day even though we realized that we had nothing to eat so we tried to scrape of the burnt part of the waffle. I used one of my kitchen knives to scrape of the burn but each stroke I took to get rid of the black seemed like I was shoveling a million tons so snow from my driveway. It felt heavy to lift the knife and felt heavy and so very tiring to scrape the ash of the eggo so we just gave up and chucked the damn waffle into the sink. We were figuring what to do next because we were getting really bored so we were walking around the house trying to think of something. Zack was in the middle of one of my Persian rugs, the one with weird geometric shapes and he told me that they were protruding out of the rug and floating around the room. We finally came to the conclusion to go upstairs and play drums. Zack was screwing around on them making up a terrible beat when I kicked him off and tried to play. It seemed impossible. The sticks felt heavy and I could barely press the bass drum pedal with my foot. I was fiddling with a beat and I was missing the symbol that was right in front of my face. I was so disoriented that I just gave up on the beat and went back downstairs with Zack. We decided to call one of our friends from a party and ask if we could join them at the party, so we left my fathers joint to go to the party. Like 15 minutes later the trip was over but our pupils were still huge. Our advice to anyone who's never taken shrooms before…do it, it's wicked.
Za©k and ®onen