Two nights ago I had my first experience with psilocybe mushrooms.
Two nights ago I had my first experience with psilocybe mushrooms. I am fairly experienced with mind-altering substances; I have used LSD, LSA, DXM, nitrous, cannabis, and salvia divinorum (though I haven't "broken through"), often in combination. I was greatly looking forward to another psychedelic experience.
I obtained 35 grams of fresh psilocybe cubensis, Treasure Coast strain. I had been doing my best to mentally prepare myself in the days before, and I fasted that afternoon and drank loads of water to clear out my system. I realized I would probably be pretty hungry while coming down, so I fixed some barbecue to have at that point. I obtained a some water and some lemon juice, and set them on my bedside table. I was going to have my experience in my room, on my bed, primarily in the dark.
At around 11 PM I chewed and ate the mushrooms: three rather large shrooms and three small aborts. After finishing them, I had a couple swallows of the lemon juice to increase the acidity in my stomach, effectively increasing its ability to absorb the alkaloids in the mushrooms. I realized at this point that I had come to the one portion of the experience which I had utterly failed to plan: waiting for onset.
I was rather tired, and I knew that that would go away once the tryptamines came into effect, but I needed to keep myself occupied until then. I read a little, but quickly changed my mind and decided to put on some music and prepare myself for the experience. I put on Autechre's Draft 7.30 and laid back, listening to the wonderfully abstract and precise experimental music. It wasn't long before I began to feel my legs floating in cyclical patterns (like riding a bicycle, though while still remaining straight), and the bed under them was moving with them in time with the music. This was interesting, but it was the only effect I felt for a little while, and was only about 20 minutes after I had ingested the mushrooms.
Before long I switched to some much more laid back music, Boards of Canada, as I felt it would fit the experience better. Autechre is probably far more geared towards LSD. I was starting to feel rather nice, rather warm. I had my eyes closed, and I began to feel some synaesthesia within about 15 minutes in the form of "feeling" the music I was listening to physically. Different sounds felt like they were moving me as if I was composed of vapour. I felt extraordinarily pleasant, and I grinned at the realization that this was merely the onset. I felt I had some slightly increased clarity of thought, but it hadn't really set in yet. The mental aspect of the experience was what I was looking forward to more than anything.
I opened my eyes after a track which gave me rather strong synaesthetic feelings, and I experienced my first visual effect of the experience in a rather startling manner. As soon as my eyes opened, my entire field of vision rapidly was flashing in a strobe-light sort of way between a black-and-white nightvision and darkness. This only lasted for a second or two, but it caught me rather off-guard. I experienced this same effect several times during the experience.
I continued listening to the music and dozed off a little. I came back as gradually as I had dosed off, about 20 minutes later. I realized at that point, "holy shit, I am no longer in a normal state of mind at all." My thoughts were coming exremely clearly and rapidly, I could not focus on anything physical at all, simply because my thinking was so rapid and in-depth. It took me literally five minutes to simply switch CDs. I cannot stress enough how powerful my thinking ability was becoming. Everything became enormously objective and rapidly, deeply analyzed without need for concentration. I turned on the lights.
My field of vision was soft, gentle, and dilated. If I looked at the window, it would gently shift back and forth a little in a way that I can't properly describe to a sober person. I suppose this is what is often described as "breathing walls." Even looking into the corner of the room which was within a few feet of me, it felt as if there was a great amount of space there, while at the same time I was still completely aware of how close it was to me. I suppose my perception of my surroundings felt a little "fish-eyed," but not in a blurry way. It was in a way that was clearer than clear. It was actually probably more realistic than the improperly rationalized way we normally view space. Looking out my window I was amazed with my ability to comprehend the vast scale the world is on, and the way I was able to think so objectively about things that I have ingrained impressions of that I didn't even realize.
I had ready the album "Nothing Lasts... But Nothing Is Lost" by Shpongle. I had never listened to it before simply because I had been saving it specifically for this experience. It is a brilliant fusion of psytrance, experimental electronic music, and ethnic music; perfect for this experience. I had been told several times that it musically interprets the psychedelic experience nearly flawlessly, and I quickly came to understand what was meant by that. I made a point to start it about 2 hours into the experience so that I'd peak near the end of the album.
I put on my big, high-quality headphones, turned out the lights, and laid back again. I started the album and closed my eyes. Jesus Christ, the synaesthesia! The music was flowing around me, around my head, spiralling, flowing. I was seeing ridiculously beautiful neon psychedelic glyphs of irregular, smooth shapes flowing together, changing colors, shifting in seemingly geometrically impossible ways which I do not have the words to describe. This was without question the most breathtakingly beautiful experience of my life, and it lasted for over an hour and with dilated time. I was grinning enthusiastically, uncontrollably, and often with my mouth hanging open the entire time, and the several clips of Terence McKenna speaking in strewn throughout the music were a rather nice icing on the ludicrously delicious psychedelic cake.
The CD ended and I took off the headphones, utterly amazed. I turned the lights on to get my bearings a little. I decided this would be a good time to partake in the barbecue I had fixed, after which I would proceed to take advantage of my expanded mind to partake in some deep thought. That was one of the best eating experiences I've ever had. I was sitting in what would normally be a rather uncomfortable position, but I was extremely content, sucking every last bit of flavor out of the meat I was consuming. I had a few sips of water and then proceeded to do some thought about my lifestyle and about the search for contentment.
I am a rather content person already with very few major problems, but I did have a couple epiphanies about the enjoyment of life in general and about the ridiculousness of those who enforce and those who foolishly care about society and its colossally arbitrary values. I was already aware of these things, but this brought some renewed enjoyment to my life in general.
I had been warned multiple times before not to look in the mirror during my experience, and told that it would cause me to feel extremely self-conscious, but as I had had a good time looking into a mirror on LSD and LSA several times, I decided to challenge this. A good decision.
I had already suspected that this was only a dangerous activity for those who have trouble facing reality and themselves in general. I am quite honestly a rather rational person. A person who is self-conscious simply needs to look at the world objectively and quit pissing their lives away on stupid bullshit like physical beauty and social norms. Life is too short to give a shit about your hair and trendy guitar-sodomizing rock bands, you silly kids.
After a couple hours I turned on some ambient music and drifted slowly to sleep. I slept very nicely and woke up energized the next day in a subtle afterglow, and spent several minutes looking at the tree outside my window, realizing how little I've really appreciated it before.
I never had a hint of a negative experience at all, and this is most likely because of my preparation and because of my self-confidence coupled with humbleness and respect towards the experience.
I highly recommend the psychedelic experience in general to anyone who is rational and willing to experience the world for what it is, and my first mushroom experience was indescribably enjoyable and very insightful. If you have an irrational comfortable little worldview that you couldn't stand to see crushed under the logic and reason of reality, you probably shouldn't be dabbling in psychedelics.