I planned a camping trip at spruce woods spirit sands and decided to take the shrooms late in the evening.
I planned a camping trip at spruce woods spirit sands and decided to take the shrooms late in the evening. I ingested 14 grams of dried mushrooms, which I prepared by boiling them in a small pot and then drinking the liquid and eating the rest. The Magic mushrooms reveal themselves quicker this way.
I began to feel the familiar nervous, uneasy and anxious feelings that started to creep up on me which resulted in me needing to go to the washroom and as I sat there looking at the floor it appeared to be fourth dimensional, the best word to describe it was it appeared transparent. When I was finished in the washroom I barely walked back to my campsite with the help of H.... and was beginning to lose control of my body. My power of reasoning was becoming distorted and it was as if layers upon layers of who "I" was began shedding away quickly until the essence of my being, an infinitesimal pinpoint of consciousness remained.
I began to pick up on mental vibrations from other people within the campground. I could read there thoughts and feelings but it didn’t feel right so I stopped. What is also interesting is since I was in a forest I could sense the curiousness of the animals minds around me, I couldn't understand them I just new that they were curious as to what was happening. I could hear them moving about in the forest.
We are innocent children until we become tainted by the influences, connections and experiences we encounter as we grow up. We are gentle beings, peaceful, blissful, loving pure souls, that is who I felt we truly are.
I remember feeling infinitesimal and child like, scanning the surroundings with my mind in awe. A park police truck passed by, its headlights shining through the forest and it’s engine rumbling like a beast. I uttered the words “bad” which I believe was because the truck represented a negative and unnatural force in the natural surroundings I was in. The words I uttered out of my mouth even sounded child like and innocent. In my child-like state the power of nature surrounding me emanated a vibration of protection and tranquility.
When the headlights passed through the forest, a web that appeared etheric (visible yet invisible) could be seen that interconnected everything on earth. The strongest feeling that came to mind was that this was a field of energy commuting mental energies from the metaphysical to the physical world.
The thought and word that I uttered earlier “bad” was a negative seed, thought generated and opened me up (Like a mental vacuum) to an enormous wave of impure, unbalanced, frightful and negative energies that we human beings generate each day through our thoughts. Thought forms are like germinating seeds, the more mental energy that is directed to a thought, the longer the thought form receives sustenance and continues to expand and remain "alive". In the condition that I was in all experiences were magnified a million fold, they were all extremely intense.
A chain reaction of events occurred which were distorted as they were happening so rapidly. A wave of negative emotions flooded my mind, suspicion, fear, mistrust, paranoia and persecution. My thoughts became clouded and irrational. I sensed a supernatural force, the elements of earth, fire, water, air and ether sending waves of vibrations to my consciousness that “they” were disappointed in my actions of experimenting with a force so great without really understanding the consequences and not preparing properly for it. I basically exceeded my limits. I somehow felt that my punishment was to return this physical body back to nature. This singular thought frightened me beyond reason. I felt my oesophagus swell and clog with mucous, I became hot then cold. I felt nauseas and very weak as if the essence of my life force was leaving my body. I poured cold water over my head to wake me up, I then vomited and immediately began to lose hope and started to give in and no longer fight for my physical life until a thought occurred. I sat in a lotus position crossed my legs like they do for meditation, yet I have never meditated before and then tensed my physical body to its limits also tensing my mental thoughts on one aspect and that was to stay alive and generate my life force back into my body, I wasn’t giving up with out a fight. At the same time this was all happening I had H.... gently take my arm and told her to have pure loving thoughts towards me. I felt a white light emanating from her, her life force flow into my being. I new at that moment I was not going to leave this world. H... then grew very tired and she went to sleep in the tent.
At that moment I felt peaceful and tranquil and controlled and alone. . When I did stop and let my mind and intellect just focus on inner peace. The beautiful thing about it was even though it was around 2:00am in the morning the world seemed very bright, actually all of nature had an luminous and beautiful glow to it and when I gently looked at a tree and it's leaves, the leaves seemed to be peacefully dancing with a beautiful rhythm and as I listened and I could hear wonderful music emanating from nature it's self. It was a blissful moment. My thought was I wonder if this is what heaven is like because I was experiencing another world. My consciousness was in a pure state at that moment. My attention was then pulled inward for though my physical eyes were opened I saw very clearly on the screen of my mind a subtle light within my forehead, very tiny and there was an oval glow to it that radiated light.
I then stood up and began to walk around, and the wonderful thing was it was as if I was walking in a body of light because there was no heavy feeling of the body anymore. When I moved around my understanding was I was the "being of light" inside this body. I could sense that I was directing my body from the point in my forehead.. I was very aware of the detail of my body’s movement. It was like a gentle dance moving around in this body. I thought to my self I am controlling it. It was such an angelic feeling. I then measured the balance of mental purity of all people on earth. I sensed and felt that there were a handful of people who were truly trying to purify there thoughts and the remaining were struggling with pain and sorrow and misguided thoughts. This overwhelmed me and the feeling was intense.
A thought came to my mind, I wished for peace in the world, this thought grew stronger and stronger. In one moment I saw a being, a point of brilliant light that emanated a golden orange light, a fine fibrous light that was so beautiful and loving.. My desire for peace grew stronger and stronger. A prophetic inner vision grew stronger and stronger. A destruction of the physical world with a magnitude to intense to comprehend. I saw storms, earthquakes, destruction of every kind occurring and then the climax, I felt that at that moment I was going to destroy the world, the universe, in fact once that thought entered my mind I had to stop because I felt it wasn’t right, at least at this time which puzzled me. Synchronized with the images of climatic destruction was a vision of a beautiful, pure and blissful utopian world that is unimaginable compared to the world we live in now. The balance of the night was hellish, however insightful, I was about to embark on a journey within.
This is when the sacred journey turned around. In a split second a thought entered my mind. Do I have the ability to control matter (nature). As soon as this thought went into the surrounding atmosphere, a distant and uncomfortable feeling within me started to grow I became more aware of my body and I began to feel very heavy and sick again it became very dark around me, actually it had become pitch black. The surrounding atmosphere had a hellish appearance to it, morbid faces formed around me, bloody red like demons. I could feel every atom in my body as if I was this heavy costume of flesh. I smelled rotting flesh and it was as if my consciousness was not separate from the body anymore, I was now the body, my consciousness was completely focused on my body and I could sense that it was decaying, dying. I was giving off bad vibrations and my attention was on the surroundings, I had a small fire near me that was keeping me warm during the night and when my attention was on it the flames grew higher and higher so I turned away and out of the corner of my eye I could see them going back to normal. I could sense the impure thoughts from the souls that occupied the earth, there thoughts made me feel very uncomfortable and ill inside and out.
I could hear in the distance wolves howling and when my attention was on them I could sense restlessness and fighting amongst them. My attention was so concentrated at the time, but it was a body conscious attention. I realized that when I focused on anything in the world I would influence it with my mind and I would have such a negative influential effect on the object of my attention. I would start pulling the attention of animals or people towards me, and my thought was, the more my attention was directed towards them the closer they would get and the closer I felt they were getting I sensed rage and anger within them was increasing towards me to a point where if they found me they would harm me.
However another thought came to mind, focus within and be calm, just make my thoughts calm, don't force it, just be calm naturally, change the ocean of storms within my mind into a narrow gentle stream that flowed so beautifully. When I did this the horror, the "Hell" I was experiencing around me slowly faded away, however my mind began to pull my attention away from the peace and I would again experience tension, fear and anxiety and so again I calmed my self naturally, this is one thing that I found important. If I forced my self to be calm the situation only worsened so I had to naturally do it which was difficult but I continued to make the effort from my heart. I never thought of asking for help from God because I didn't know who God was at that time in my life. There were fleeting visions I had when I would return to a peaceful state of mind and what I saw was a world of peaceful human beings but when my attention was pulled into body consciousness again the people that inhabited that world seemed to turn there attention away from me and again I fell into the battle between my intellect and my mind. I had an understanding of what to do to get out of the negative situation but the mind was VERY powerful and kept pulling me back into that body conscious negative state. I was trapped in a constant cycle, a battle between mind and intellect, peace and peacelessness.
Time passed and slowly I was returning back to my regular state of consciousness, descending back to the "normal" world I was used to. I could see the sun peering through the fog and trees. My experience was complete. I felt relieved and relaxed.
One last set of thoughts did enter my mind. The mind is a very powerful instrument and anything is possible if you just focus your mind and intellect. But I was then pulled by my impure personality traits and these types of thoughts entered my mind: lust, anger, greed, attachment and ego type thoughts. This was an obvious sign that I had to work on myself within to attain the higher consciousness that I experienced earlier.
I stood up and stretched and it was as if nature was applauding me for making it through the night and learning so much, I walked to the shower barefoot which normally I could not due to the pain the rocks usually would inflict on my feet but I felt at one with nature, balance so to speak and felt no pain at all. There was a flock of crows who were following me to the shower, it was weird.
As I took my shower paranoid thoughts entered my mind, thoughts of being pursued, but I reminded my self it was only my mind tricking me.
When I was finished showering all refreshed, the day was bright and sunny and calm, a good sign.. I sat at the campsite on the ground and saw small chipmunks one by one coming out of the forest, there must have been close to 7 of them, young ones, perhaps these were the little ones that were scurry about earlier that evening. I pulled out some sunflower seeds and fed them.
That day I decided to drive back to the city and upon entering the outskirts of the city I felt a heaviness, a negative atmosphere I was driving into, perhaps I was picking up on all the thoughts from the city. I felt really strange and that afternoon when I went to sleep I saw my self floating above the earth looking down and watching nuclear bombs exploding all over the world.. I then shot down onto the surface of the earth, it was dark and destruction was everywhere… I then saw a man get shot and a tiny star flew out of his forehead as his body fell to the ground .. I then woke up.
This whole experience changed my life completely, I will never be the same as I was and I am careful not to talk to anyone about it as they just wouldn’t understand.