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I was on vacation in Jamaica.

I was on vacation in Jamaica. Jamaica is commonly known to be a marijuana haven, home of the finest stuff on earth. The truth is, it has plenty of wild mushrooms growing that are more potent and mind-alterring than anything I have yet tried.

I was staying in a bungalow on the beach, with my parents. They were off enjoying the paradise that is the weed-country, but unlike me, they weren't interested in wonderful brain candy. I had discovered a small forest, a grove of sorts, in the rear yard of the bungalow. The bungalow was right on the beach. In this little grove I found an incredible abundance of cubenis. I saw white-spotted, red amanitas which I stayed away from, for knowledge of their poisonous nature.

I was sitting on the deck facing the beach around noon. I had suffered a slight hangover that morning, haven had a number of margaritas with some friendly locals, and one fine-ass girl from New York who had also been vacationing. She only had a few drinks, but all the same she enjoyed it. I had headed to her place that evening, her parents being absent, and you can guess what happened.

Anyway, this morning, after surviving the hangover as usual, I had my collection of shrooms I had been saving for twenty four hours, waiting for a morning to spend shrooming without the presence of my annoying parents. I ate about twelve shrooms, enjoying their sun-flower-seedy deliciousness. I don't care what anyone says, I love stuffing those little critters. I had taken five vitamin C tablets, to enhance the trip.

After about a half-hour, I was seeing the waves already starting to do funny things. Some of them were slapping each other down, others growing and shrinking. It was a very early part of the trip, and these things had hardly kicked in yet. I was laughing and enjoying the beginning of the euphoria.

After about an hour had passed since I first downed the mushies, I was laughing my ass off. There were children down on the beach, running into the water and doing flips and pulling Kung-Fu moves on the waves. They were kicking the waves' ass, and every once in a while a huge wave would come roaring over and drown a little boy or girl. The child would be dragged out into the ocean, and the rain-bow coloured water would lift them up upon its green foam and drive them towards the shore. These waves were getting huge, and I was staring at a boy surfing on a sleeping old man on top of a wave that was roaring right over me. The figure disappeared over the horizon of the roof above me, and the waves flashed their warm soothing Jamaican-ness as they encompassed me and drowned the bungalow behind me. Things were amazing here, and I was hard-core tripping...

I was floating around in an underwater world. The water was filled with swirlings mists of green and blue. I was breathing out huge yellow bubbles that were glistening from the reflection of sunlight. Little elves were swimming around me, and I was descending into a darker area of the water. I was giggling like a little girl looking and pointing at the short elfin entities. They were shouting at each other, and those that weren't swimming gathered in the middle and started to wrestle each other. I wanted to show my own overwhelming strength by tearing each elf apart, even though I loved the little guys. As I descended into the darkness, breathing fine even though I was underwater, I lost my pleasant elf-hood. I wanted to return up with my little friends, but I was now in complete darkness with only a vague light above. I was hearing the moans of dead souls, the calls out of ghosts wanting to steal my body as their own source of earthly travel. I started to swim up, and my amazing skill in this art allowed me to swim up with only a few strokes, so far up that I emerged from the surface beyond the elves and the water swirled around my feet as if it were heading down a drain in a bath-tub. Everything was unusually fine now, other than a few distortions. I heard a voice that sounded similar to the moaning, of a familiar girl I had met. It was the girl from last night.

She saw me with my wicker basket of shrooms sitting at the foot of my chair. She grinned, and asked me if she could have some. I said, quote/unquote: "Thou mayest have almighty magical shroomage for thyself when thou hast completed thy task in seeking the golden dragon."
She looked at me with an evil smirk on her face, and asked, "Really?". I looked up at her, my face feeling stern and rugged, my chin feeling as if it were covered in warrioristic stubble. "Indeed", I replied.

She suddenly knelt down in front of me and I sank into a pleasuring, heavenly zone. You can imagine what she was doing... (TO be continued)

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