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Complete Awareness of Universal Integration

It all began on an unusually warm November evening in southern Ontario.

It all began on an unusually warm November evening in southern Ontario. I had been well versed in the ways of many psychadellic drugs before, but I don't think to date I have ever had an experience so profound. I had just picked up about 50 grams of bone-dry shrooms for my friends and I. After I dropped off those that were spoken for, I found myself sitting in a park near a boring coffee shop with one of my best friends.

We smoked a few joints, and when we were starting to get high, I unveiled the supprise... a 10 gram bag of shrooms. We both took a handful and ate them down. (I don't know if this is important or not, but they were probably the most delicious mushrooms I've ever tasted in my life). We resumed talking, walking around, etc. and spent quite a while at the coffee shop.

The experience came about normally, I started getting the feeling of "lightness" I regularly experience on mushrooms. The world started to become more interesting to me, as I began to "feel" the presence of objects rather than just see them, and so on and so forth.

We hung around there for a few epiphanies, until my friend's father saw us and stopped to pick us up (Apparently it was raining but I didn't notice). Upon reaching my house, I walked in and sat down to watch a bit of TV with my dad. He was watching this incredibly stupid show which I found to be rather annoying, plus the energy coming off the television screen wasn't the best, so I went to my room.

This is when things started getting abnormal. My high was starting to wear down, as this was a few hours later, but I was still intended on having some fun. I loaded up one of my favorite Dead albums, Live/Dead, and hit play on my turntable. The slow, mellow intro to the first song (Dark Star) was accompanied by an increase in my high once again. I glanced at a few posters on my wall, and it looked like Jimi Hendrix was playing his guitar in the poster, and the sound was somehow captured in the image. I didn't see any of this, but I felt it, which had never happened before. I decided to eat a few more shrooms to stimulate my buzz a bit, and I think I ate another 5 or 6 grams worth, but it could have been more or less. I was more interested in experiencing the texture and taste of them than I was with how many I ate.

I continued to relax in my room, and watch everything breathe and exist. At one point in time, the lines around one of my posters looked like they kept getting more and more complex, and I laughed at it, unable to define what was happening with words. Eventually I noticed that the record had stopped, and I promptly flipped it over.

The beginning of the second song, St. Stephen, hurtled me into an existance I have never felt before. It was unlike any trip from any drug I have ever experienced in my life. Reality was there, plain and simple, but it co-existed with the divine. I could look at one object, and think of another, and physically see some kind of connection between the two. My thoughts were manifesting themselves in patterns of light which seemed to appear as if a light bulb was implanted in the top of my skull, scattering rays everywhere. I kept feeling everything build and build, and I just wanted to cry because being around everything made me unbelievably happy for some reason.

I glanced at my alarm clock, and looking at it made some kind of feeling of horror in me; the red numbers on the screen just seemed dangerous and foreboading, so I decided that time was irrelevant, unplugged it, and placed it in the third drawer of my dresser. Why I did this, I don't know, but it just felt right.

After a while, the sound coming out of my speakers started to sound and feel distorted, like it was an elastic being twisted, and stretched. I decided to pay attention to this, and when I looked at my speakers, everything changed in a way I can't even begin to describe. It was all the same, I could see the shape, the colour, and everything as it is in normal existance, but somehow it was different. Somehow everything just seemed more important. I had a moment where I kept getting almost-visions about how my existance and my stereo's existance were interconnected. I saw where the atoms in my body (and I saw the atoms) came from, like I was aware of the complete history of every element of my body.

I exhaled, and I was aware of the energy in my breath. It "felt" like a cloud of "purpleness" floating around, and eventually joining with everything. Music continued in the background to distort, and I decided to dance. This proved to be rather interesting, it felt like every atom in my body was connected to strings which were connected to other atoms and other strings, and formed a lattice of interconnectivity. I accepted this as the fibres of consciousness which bind and integrate everything in the universe together. I closed my eyes, and continued to move feeling the strings move, bend, and twist in a wave-like pattern. I felt as if I could send my consciousness along one of the waves and experience other things far away, but when I tried, I realized everything else was exactly the same as it was in the here and now, and it was only the perspective that changed, as if everything shares an identical existance, and perception of this existence is like a lens on a camera, everyone is slightly different, but yet does the same task in the long run.

This type of imagery seemed to flood my mind for quite a long time, and I became immersed into meditation on this thought. All I wanted to do was explore the bonds between me, water vapour in the air, a sleeping tree outside, the nearby river, this "thing" that had allowed me the clarity (the chemicals in mushrooms themselves seemed to be a separate entity within me, and I could only describe them to myself as a "thing"), other people, animals, and plants. I sank so far into this meditation that I had experiences beyond the scope of human conception. All I could do was be aware of everything, but not comprehend it.

I snapped back to attention by the horrible, horrible skip right at the beginning of the third song, The Eleven. Everything that just happened had taken place in less than 6 minutes. This opened my eyes more than anything else that has ever happened to me. In that 6 minutes, I not only had a moment of eternity, but a moment AS eternity; I experienced a complete awareness and understanding of universal integration.

I sat calmly, having being enlightened so deeply, and lit a candle. I spent the rest of the night watching the flames dance, and changing the record as needed.

Now, in those 6 minutes, I had experienced infinite sights, sounds, tastes, colours, and umpteen new senses that seemed to always be with me, but just without a voice in my brain. I know this report has sounded rather dull, but believe me the experience wasn't. I just don't think I can ever describe what I experienced with any form of communication possible. Even my own memory fails me, and I can just remember echoes of the experience today.

Now, as much as mushrooms can be a very safe agent of awareness, I don't reccomend doing what I did. I ate myself at least 10 grams that night, and an unexperienced mushroom user may have gone insane as a result. Even an experienced mushroom user would likely have had problems with that much, but for some reason luck was on my side, as if the universe called to me to experience this.

All things, when put together, equal the holy Om, and until then, I had no idea how complex Om might ever have been. I am definately grateful that the sacred mushrooms decided to reveal this to me.

Happy existance!

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