Me & my friend Bert went lookin for some shrooms earlier this year & we found the biggest bloody gold tops you've ever seen! Anyway, we took them back to my Hayleys house & put them in this stew with carrots & shit & ate it. This was the first time any of us had tripped so we didn't know what to expect.
We waited for like a half hour & then thought that the shrooms we got were not really shrooms at all, so we had a few cones & all felt better. As I was going for my 4th cone, I stared at the bong & it grew this huge face with a big cheesy grin which spread from cheek to cheek. As I stared at it longer it started to speak & was mumbling shit about "SMOKE ME!!!!" So I shat myself & threw it against the wall & ran outside.
I got to the back step & then made a huge jump, then I started falling really slowly & as I looked around me I saw a big plane go past & there were heaps of clouds. When I tried to find a parachute I completely freaked out & went face first into the ground from 100ft above. It bloody caned like all hell but I wasn't dead so I didnt complain.
I then started on this huge trek through a deep ravine which I landed in & got lost. I started to walk around in circles & then all of a sudden I knew I was in China. So I walked for like 5kms then I walked into this big street with lanterns everywhere with dragon kites & I could smell chinese food everywhere but there were no chinese people.
Then I heard a loud explosion & I was in a trench with all these dudes with guns next to me. I said "hi" to 1 of the guys next to me & his head suddenly exploded all over my face which resulted in me throwing up everywhere. After I had finished throwing up I got out of the trench & started running. After a while I tripped on this barbed wire & I just lay there coz all these bullets were flying past me. Then I heard another huge explosion & felt myself get ripped apart & I knew I was dead coz it was all just black.
So kids dont ever try this shit unless you know your going to handle it because i eneded up in a psychiatric hospital for 2 years because i thought i was dead & then turned into a raving lunatic who claimed to be reincarnated which wasn't very fun.