the inner revelation

As i read more and more reports of an alternate reality, where some light is shed on the true meaning of things, and the nature of the universe, during tripipin like a bitch on shrooms, ive decided maybe i should share wat i learned.

My trip was originally titled "the revelation", and it was a level 5 bordering on a near death experience, of course this is only speculation. this is the same trip, but i would like to expand a little on the more serious part of my trip. i referred to this part of the trip earlier wen i said i hypnotized myself while staring into my eyes through a mirror, but i focused more on the humorous side of the trip.

I dint see this certain part, but i felt it, and it was a feeling, not any sort of image. i started to think about my life, and saw myself as part of this "mathematical equation" i say that because it is how it can be best described. i was just a radical value, unlike all other values, which was doing its part in the equation, or groups of equations that made up this one network of explanation. i saw the depth of this equation too. it was so large it seemed to swallow itslef, and keep "rewinding". a good way too understand this is to look at an infinte sign. it is a horizontal figure eight. i believe that this is the best pictorial image that can be conjured up of infinte. this equation was so large, but so simple, it couldnt be comprehended under normal situations. it is all around us. every tiny atom and piece of matter which makes up this universe is part of this equation, and has its own value. together (i mean here that everything in the universe) we all play a role in balancing this great equation. we change the definition of each other's values as we experience new things, much like a chemical reaction. and in the end, it does not matter because there is one outcome of this universe....

the reason i think this universe was created was for one reason. to balance an unbalanced force. after this trip, i believe there is no such thing as nothing. think about it. try to image nothing. it simply does not exist, and is a paradox in itself. the moment you think something, or label it, it exists. but how can something that doesnt exist, have a name? because we gave it one. this is also important because i believe that every law of physics, appears to work the way it does, because we observed it to be so. we measured, and did equations, and came up with this "law" which governs the behavior of molecules. an integral part in this equation was chaos. all around me, i felt as if there were chaos, and things had their own way of working out in this system. they changed each other's values (or experiences) by coming in contact with each other, and spreading out a sort of equilibrium throughout their travels in space. they were balancing each other. i truly belive that man's existence in the universe is a crucial role to help this equation be put back into equilibrium. space and time seem to go hand and hand. one cannot function without the other. look at time as a fourth dimension as time. "meet me at the corner of so an so, on the 4th floor, at 3 oclock." 4 dimsensions. matter seems to have a hold on time, though, by just existsing. i think that there would be no time if it werent for matter, but thats not the same if looked at in vice versa. it is said that since a photon is travelling at the speed of light, it has no age. this is the basic premise of the theory of relativity. it starts to age as soon as it is slowed down, and wat would slow it down? matter mostly, therefore creating a concept of time. but this is just a tiny part of the equation, even though it seems to rule our everyday lives. my basic point in describing how time varies, is that we measure it "as is". this is how we see time to flow, but in reality it can be slowed or sped up in either direction to the point of nonexistence. our laws all just describe our universe in our effort to try to make sense of the chaos i experinced. this was wat i saw as our part in balancing the equation. we talk, measure, add, or subtract, just because that is wat we do. we constantly associate things with other things. i saw this as a trait shared by all sentient beings. animals, and people basically. i saw trees and insects to be a part of the earth, as much as a river system, or a mountian range. they r seprate from the earth, but they regulate the environment for us to live happily in. there is much more to say, but its hard not to bore people with this when theyre not trippin. i felt this all in a blink of an eye wen i was trippin.

just wen i felt my soul being pulled away, to a huge pool of energy, i tried to free myself of this chaos. it felt like i was seriously about to die. my energy was going back to where it came from, and i still had enough sense to pull back. thats wen i stopped feeling these things. it was just an instant, and this is all i saw. in that instant i asked many questions, not to "god", but to myself, and i was answered with feelings, rather than words or images that represented ideas. and there it was. everything i ever wanted to know, was already inside of me, but i just dint have the means of accessing it. I can give this advice to someone who wants to experience this: First off, i got my mushrooms from a phish show, i just asked someone who was scalping tickets if he had shrooms, and he led me to a questionable lookin guy with a ton of pretty good looking shrooms. i admit it took alot of shrooms, but wen i took them i knew something strange was gonna happen to me. now ive never been the one to speculate on the nature of things, or why we live, but i had such an urge to at the time. wat i did was look into a mirror and hypnotize myself with my eyes. i had a very pleasing time examining my psyche and delving into my various psychological subdivisions, and wen i started to look back on my life, i realized all this. i questioned my core belief of who i was, and wat i was doing here. i got a hell of an answer.

this trip has totally changed my life. now i do shrooms more as a religious experience every time. after that first trip which greatly expanded my mind, i read alot of physics books, and philosophy, as well as ancient history, and books on rligious beliefs. i knew i had the basic answer, but i wanted to make sense of the world around me with this one experince constantly taking part in the grander scheme of things. and it does make sense. everything does. and everytime i trip now, its like im goin on a journey through the history of not mankind, but of anything i want. i think i have given myself the ability to control my trips to the point from which i can actualy learn from them. im not sure how i did it, but i did my best to explain to you how u might be able to do it. my best advice, dose with alot of fuckin shrooms! from that one trip, i have gained the utmost respect for these plants. im very thankful they let feel the things i did, even tho i think that if i continued to look into things during that trip, i would have went completely insane. i almost felt it happen to me. anyway, the rest of my trip is in "the revelation", its alot less serious than this, and kinda funny. btw, has anyone noticed how strange shit always seems to happen to you wen ur trippin face? things that normally would have no chance of happening usually do, and thats another reason why i love to trip. there is one feeling i get wen im trippin, that i dont think is defined by any website, or anyone ive talked to. i call it the "staleness". sometimes it happens right before you get paranoid. youd be sitting there with a group of other people who are also trippin, and then u get this nagging feeling, as if u should be somewhere else. like this scene is just fucked up, and you need to leave it. its got that "alone in the universe" tinge to it, but more intense mixed in with some fear, paranoia, sadness, and for lack of better words, staleness. please let me know wat u think of this feeling. and its not a time loop, because ive been able to record time while experienceing this feeling. thanks, and stay away from small rodent like animals while on alot of shrooms, they r not fun... peace...
-infumas, back in the house once again.