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First Trip: The Sadness of the Truth

My first mushroom trip was interesting to say the least.

My first mushroom trip was interesting to say the least. I have a good friend who brought me to the attention of psychedelics a few months ago. After a lot of research, I decided it would be worth it to learn. The two of us and another friend met up last night to share the experience.

The experienced one, A, weighed out the fungus into three stacks, 4 grams each. All three of us took an RX MAOI to strengthen the trip. I pulled out some cds of Sigur Ros, Mogwai, and The Postal Service. We started out with some Sigur Ros on medium volume and after the MAOI's set in (half an hour or so), we each ate our 4 grams. The taste was not as bad as I expected. I washed it down with some OJ, and we turned on an animated film, Waking Life, without sound and with subtitles on, just for stimulus. Great film to watch while tripping, I concluded.

The body high set in after about 30 minutes from ingestion. The body high was much more pleasant than I've experienced on marijuana, or even opiates. The psychedelic effects came up slowly with the body high. After another 30 minutes or so, my mind started racing. I also started noticing visuals at this time. I looked up at the spackle ceiling, and it was stretching and morphing slowly. I did note, however, it did not really appear to move in itself; I perceived it as a mind effect (I was under the impression psychedelics actually make things look like they are really moving, but that was not the case with me). The mind effects were amazing. I pondered science, technology, universe theory, spirituality, and psychology all at the same time. I found myself extremely interested in science. I felt like I understood everything. I was in a state of intellectuality like I'd never been before. I kept thinking about memories and how they are linked together like a spiderweb. I kept thinking about networks... computer networks, friend networks, river networks, and so on. I felt so connected with the universe, it was empowering.

The visual effects increased. I saw flowing in textures. I was really interested in the ceiling. I laid on my back and stared at the spackle. In the spackle, I saw different patterns emerge... weavings, women, flowing rivers, and rocky ground. I remember thinking to myself, "Man, I bet the guy who invented spackle was eating mushrooms!" and giggling to myself.

I was very social during the strong part of the trip. I felt very outgoing and connected with my friends, A and K. A and I kept talking about drugs and science, and had pretty interesting conversations (at least for the moment). We were finding interest in the silliest things. We talked about how the human hand is a very complex machine with all the muscles and tendons. K didn't talk much during the experience. He laid in about the same position all the time. Anytime we tried to talk to him, he would just laugh at us.

Music was so interesting while on the drug. While peaking, I kept forgetting who we were listening to, even though I was very familiar with all the music. It sounded new to me, but I did recognize the lyrics to some extent. This loss of memory intrigued me. I came to the conclusion that shrooms inhibit long-term memory a little, while weed inhibits short-term memory a lot. I kept thinking, "This is my kind of drug! Weed is out." I had rolled a joint before the session, but never ended up smoking it, because the experience was so lucid and fun in itself.

I noticed all my sensation was divided into layers. Vision, sound, even tactile. Everything felt so spacious, wide, big. I used the restroom, and washed my hands. As I was washing my hands, I suddenly felt like I was a giant. My time perception slowed down, and the water seemed to flow slower.

We turned the TV and music off, and just sat for a while, silently. This was near the end of the plateau. For some reason my nose was running. Wet stuff feels so weird while tripping. I decided I wanted to watch the Matrix. We turned it on and watched. About half way through, I noticed I was really coming down and got really tired. I kept yawning and started to feel uncomfortable. After the movie was over I still felt a little weird, but really wanted to sleep. I set up a cot and laid down.

It was at this point I started to feel a little depressed. I was coming out of the trip, and realized that all the scientific thought was almost meaningless. I kept thinking about Ecclesiastes. "For in much wisdom is much grief, And he who increases knowledge increases sorrow." I kept thinking about how much I hated work and how I have a lot of stuff to do for school. I felt like I wouldn't do drugs again. I thought about Huxley. I thought about socialism, and I thought about the meaningless of life. I remembered the line in the Matrix, "Why, oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill?" It was the Sadness of the Truth. This morning when I woke up, I felt a whole lot better. I can't say the experience was incredibly life-changing, but it did show me that I can have everything I still feel like nothing. I guess everybody should remember that. I feel like I will do shrooms again sometime, but I'm not sure when. I think I'll give it a month to soak in...


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