Hello all. Tonight I, along with two other guys took 8 large specimens of Psilocybe Subaureginosa, a wood-loving mushroom. We collected around 80 - 100 of them from a very well-endowed (so to speak) orchard, and belive me there were plenty more, but we didn't welcome greed.
Anyway, I've tripped numerous times before, on mushrooms and acid, and I can finally say that I have reached the ultimate conclusion (for lack of a better word). But before I try to describe the moment of revelation, I'll start from scratch. I'm still piecing it together in my mind now, some six hours after ingesting the sacred flesh.
We planned it to be a fun night of tripping with friends and playing guitar (we're all musicians), but it soon evolved into something far more infinitely complex, so rich that it would possibly change our lives.
We began by munching the shrooms down in an almost ritualistic fashion, sitting in a circle as we each said thanks for the opportunity to sample this treasure. We played guitar for awhile and felt it coming on around 15 minutes later. We could feel it through the music, and although nausea was present, it was soon to be overcome.
We moved outside and thought we'd explore A's back yard, which runs down into a gulley or sorts with a lot of bush and wildlife. We stumbled, feeling almost drunk with delight, down the hill and came to a clearing at the bottom. It was dusk and as we journeyed further we came across some amazing glow-worms living in a dark stream. We looked closer, mistrusting our eyes, and indeed they were glow worms. Anyway we carried on as darkness fell and A began talking about some seemingly negative things, and we kept telling him just to let go and let it flow and he'd enjoy it more.
My vision was now completely covered by transparent cobwebs, or spider-like patterns and for a moment I swore I had night vision. We returned to the relaxing environment of A's back yard and talked, again with A sounding like he wasn't enjoying it. He began talking about social constructs and stuff, and getting frustrated with all the "labels" that people put on things. We all decided he was talking so loud that the neighbours might hear, so we ventured inside to find that the lounge was not the same room as it was before. It looked dingy, dirty, and the lights were really playing with our eyes, so we decided to head into a room with more peaceful vibes. By now A was ranting and beginning to sound like what some may call "mad". He started wondering if he'd ever come down (it was his first ever mushroom trip) and we assured him he would. It's strange, but as A's rantings and theories grew and expanded, he began pulling N and I into his train of thought. Soon, we were all flowing seething masses of energy and as we sat in the dark the world that we once knew was obliterated, and every ten minutes or so A would say something else which helped me understand the way things work better. Time ceased to exist and N, A, and I began experiencing a simultaneous birth, or awakening of some sort. Everything is merely energy, an eternal flow with no real destination. It really is one collective flow, or conciousness from which we, as individuals take from. We join and separate with other masses and all there is is energy. By now, we all ceased to exist in the framework we knew as a world/society. The divine illumination of it all was so overwhelming that our egos were ripped apart and we joined the "flow" of energy, free from taint by judgement values that society inflicts upon us.
Anyway, I can't describe it fully, but all I can say is that thanks to A, and his insights, we all experienced a birth and we evolved tonight. We felt the love of the river of life, and though it may sound corny it was the ultimate truth revealed to us finally. We had been searching for it, denying it's prescence and denying ourselves of this basic right to love and feel the love.
I could, and still can feel a pure energy inside me, and I emerged feeling like I had witnessed a secret that only a few, including A and N, know about. We all agreed that there's no need for ever tripping again, the mushroom has taught us all it knows and it's universal truth. NOTHING could EVER top the insights we had on this, our last mushroom trip. I have been doing drugs (hash/acid/shrooms/speed) for the last three years and this is it for me. I needed to go through the cycle to find out what I wanted. Now I feel that cycle is complete, and I have emerged empowered from the depths of my own psyche. I KNOW THE SECRET OF LIVING A HAPPY LIFE, and nothing can take that away from me, and I thank the flesh of the Gods for allowing me to better understand the universe. I know this all sounds dramatic, but I feel SO, SO, SO, strongly about this amazing experience.
Here's poem I wrote when I got home, again trying to put in words what one cannot portray:
All I had to do was ask.....
And now I'm seeing you for what you are
Adjoining flows that for a moment intertwine
That's you and I
Faster still, it's hard to grasp
But tapping in could make it start
Holding on is what we do
Instead of letting it go, letting it pass through
And all you are is beautiful
And who the hell am I to bask?
All it is is matter, it really don't matter
As long as you make it last
....and so it goes for the ones that know.....