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Through the Window

I began the night in the company of good friends who are graduating PSU.

I began the night in the company of good friends who are graduating PSU. I have recently completed my finals and had some time to relax.

I went over and started smoking a double chamber water pipe of some serious blueberry Kind bud. Then my close friends went to bed, after several hours of philosophical discussion and general humor on everything from the Dukes of Hazard, to walking and looking at the stars, to arguments on the nature of knowledge (Descartes v. Hobbes).

Once that was done, I went to LXA, a local fraternity, where the guys are actually chill as hell and pretty intelligent for frat guys :) I went up stairs after conversing with some women and chilled with some of the older brothers of the house I know.

I obtained an 1/8 of what looked something like P.cube. and or liberty caps, lots of medium-small brownish shrooms. I was having some munchies and I proceeded to eat the entire 1/8. I decided to put some nature music on for awhile in the background, opened the windows upstairs and watched the matrix. So much of that movie is not only special effects, but almost ALL of it is borrowed from philosophy and psychology (I'm an engineering major by the way). It also touches heavily on the drug culture, and everytime I watch it (sober, high, or tripping) I get a new point of view and many thought questions.

After the movie blew my mind and philosophy wouldn't get out of my head, the shrooms really began to kick in. These little babies were strong. Everyone was asleep in the house and I could hear the birds chirping, and some light rain in the early morning, the smell of the air was incredible. It was the most beautiful 70 degree night. Walking through the house darkness began to scare me, I thought I could talk to spirits and my ancestors. Red and green shifts followed and prior, the movie gave me many framing time effects and tracers.

Everything pixelated as if is was the matrix and mirrors seemed to be portal or windows to other worlds in which I was entirely sure if I concentrated hard enough it would suck me in much like the matrix when Neo touched the mirror. Things began to morph and breathe. I realized I should go home, and I debated walking on this beautiful night, but I couldn't leave my car, so I waited and drove like 20 miles an hour the whole way home, the lights were so bright and the cars seemed to be telling me to look at the light and and see the lights of the night and smell the air and realize light, is love, love brings understanding. Like when the sparks fly in the movie and Trinity (a nice biblical reference) brings neo back to life with love. Then with her love he begins to believe all is possible and truly finally begins to live. Awakening through love and the magic red pill... Hmm :)

I went home finally and was sad the drive was over, I felt at one, as if travelling through a tunnel at light speed one with all creation. I stepped in the door and went to my bedroom, flipped on the black lights and began to write some very heavy thoughts, all the while I saw fractals and I could see spirits' face on my body and floating around me.

I tried to lay down and sleep, cause I knew I was tired, but I was so elated and happy, all I could do was stare outside for an hour before and during the most beautiful sunrise and smell the flowers out my window. Nature is the ultimate joy.

I wondered about death, if it was so scary, but I know I would never do something, but if we have souls, what are we so affraid of... I think when the spirits call me home, I will not be affraid.

I lay down at my pillow and began to close eyes, and I felt as if I was morphing into the pillow, as if my consciousness were being beamed into the universe and time meant nothing, space was something I'm not inhabiting, but something I am dependent upon for my existence as a substance and I was truly apart of it. The sensations from moving and feeling the warmth and flowing into the space around me, this quintescent matter and time, made me realize how our senses limit us. We are so sure of our own reality, but truth is only as deep as our minds will take us... Honestly, what is real? Can you define real?

If I had time I wish I could go through Hobbes v. Descartes, I highly suggest you read it. Meditations 1-3 of descartes and the first few chapters of hobbes "leviathan". Suddenly, all of this babble will be logical and reality and logic will be something one sees in a whole new light.

Peace, J

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