First Trip: Bad

My first was with a bunch of friends. A few of us had been planning on tripping for a couple months, and when we finally managed to get some time off work and buy some mushrooms from another friend who (alas) couldn't join us, we gathered at my girlfriends apartment. There were 5 of us including myself, 3 of us (myself included) who had never tripped on shrooms before. I can't tell you what species the shrooms were, but I'm certain they were not cubensis judging from all the pictures I've seen on the web. I had been researching shrooms and shroom culture for over a year prior, so I thought I knew what to expect. I WAS WRONG.

I felt the first effects within 20 minutes of eating them. I felt nauseous and dizzy, and generally uncomfortable. I rushed to the bathroom where I really began to feel crappy. My thoughts were, "Oh man- what have I done?" I tried to pull myself out of the "intoxication" like I do when I feel drunk and don't want to anymore, but I couldn't. My mistake was not accepting what I had done, and continuing to fight it. I locked myself in her room away from the others, stripped down to my boxers, and climbed into her bed. I closed my eyes, and began to see patterns ebb and flow before my eyes, and all the while my stomach was twisted into knots. The sheets began to hug me, and I felt warm- really warm. I had no watch and I didn't think to look at the clock but time was meaningless anyway. I heard the others laughing and playing in the next room, but I was too frightened by their voices to move from the bed. My girlfriend pleaded with me to come out but I was scared of her too. I watched the patterns on my eyelids for what seemed like forever, before I went the bathroom. I saw the white in the floor tiles begin to bleed into my skin. My girlfriend then demanded entrance to get to the bathroom, so I let her in. She said she started to feel uncomfortable around me, because she was picking up my "bad vibes". After the peak was over I felt pretty badly about how i had acted, and apologized to everyone for ruining the trip. They all said I wasn't to blame, I just got scared and I should have trusted in them to help me through it. We all went outside and played around for a few hours until the trip had ended. I felt physically and mentally destroyed afterwards, and I slept most of the next day away with my girlfriend.

That was my first trip. Having read the level descriptions I'd say it was a level 1 or almost 2, and not a very good one. I was anxious, nervous and scared of what I had done and I was afraid I'd never come out of the trip. My own fears prevented me from having a good trip. Pay particular attention to that, all of you reading this before your first trip!!