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Unpreparedness saved my experience.

This is a report of my first mushrooms trips, mainly posted because it was something I'd like to share.

This is a report of my first mushrooms trips, mainly posted because it was something I'd like to share. The group is hard to give, it was a level 3 or 4 trip; all depending on where in the trip I was. It was my first trip and I was just 15 years old, female and less then 50 kg.
It was a sunny day at the end of June, in Amsterdam where I live. I was with two friends, Vera and Paul. I had been interested in tripping for a long time, even from childhood and at some point Paul suggested to go eat shrooms. Vera and I only smoked weed back then. I liked the idea and it was a nice day, Vera agreed with both of us wanted to and we went to a near smartshop. Paul claimed anything but hawaiians was boring and we bought two doses of fresh hawaiians for that reason, the strongest mushrooms on earth. We went to the park to go eat them there but ran into two other friends, they wanted to go with us as well and they went off to buy their own shrooms.
We decided to go eat them at some nice grassy field. Vera couldn't eat them because she found them so disgusting and she ate about 4 heads but I decided to on eating. After all I knew nothing about 'tripping too hard' and I didn't know the common dose either. I was quite nervous at that point, because it was my first trip, but just ate them and drank them away with some coke. After eating almost a whole pack Paul ate almost a whole one and the other two friends left to go somewhere else.
As we were sitting there I decided to go smoke a joint while waiting, I took out everything but for some reason I didn't find myself able to roll a joint, I kept being pushed backwards by the feeling. I did not realize I was already tripping hard. I kept forgetting I was going to make a joint and had some closed eye visuals. At this point, my vision was very sharp, it was about 45 minutes after eating the mushrooms. At some point someone else decided to go make the joint as I wasn't able to. I decided to lay down on my back and look at the sky which was violet and started to pattern a bit. The grass became wavy and started to pattern a bit, the trees were growing and shrinking. The nerves were gone and I was in complete amazement focused only on remembering this.
At some point people started to look strange and clear blue-red lines appeared in the grass. These were organic and they were the 'tempo of life'. It made no sense but I was far too amazed. I already decided mushrooms were my favorite drug but I had no idea what was about to happen next.
We got a bit annoyed at the place and decided to go walking. This is where the mushrooms really kicked in hard. I started to see long trails behind everyone and hear strange alien sounds, at this point the confusion came up a bit, I had a hard time thinking as the words kept falling apart before I could think them properly. I was just thinking how the world was nice in colors.
At this point the visuals got more and more intense, the ground was bursting open forming 'bubbles' and I saw it breathing out and in. The trails on people were meters long by now and there were colors flying around. People would sink into the ground and rise up while my vision was about to fall apart.
I wasn't in my place anymore, my whole being was pulled out of line and behind me was nothing. I started to get really confused but we kept saying: 'we're poisoned children' for some reason.
We decided to go the square, a place where the alternative weed-smoking youth often meet up, there was no one there as it was getting late though (around 6). It was about 1,5 hour since we ate the shrooms. I thought it couldn't get more intense then this but I didn't know what was about to happen.
The closed eye visuals were faces, churches and painted windows, but most of all complicated patterns. When on the square, sound waves were hitting me and everything was spinning, I sat down for a bit, I couldn't even see where my own street went and everything looked sharp-bright confusing.
Paul at that point was having a bad trip; he complained how stuff went in circles and was freaking out. He was also worried about Vera and me as we were not really 'present' anymore, At some point he figured we had to go to my house as it wasn't too far to ride. I complained as my mother was home, and I couldn't face her like this but after seeing the whole area getting grey and cold I decided to go in after all.
When I arrived home my house was a bit floating, very shiney and when I looked up the hallway it was hanging down and shiney. I heared a sort of angel choirs (I'm not religious) and saw a bright light. Sound was the weirdest thing ever, as it was everywhere, even in my vision.
I went upstairs to my room only saying 'I'm home and Vera and Paul are here', when in my home we became pieces of a puzzle and sat on my couch, I really though we were indeed pieces of a puzzle, metaphor turned realistic.
I was confused and my vision field wasn't much left, half of my room was upside down, there were about 5 corners at random places and digital numbers were across the room.
I figured we could listen to some music and put up black-doom metal band Bethlehem (now they have a strange hollow insane sound, imagen that on shrooms). It sounded to me like the music was everywhere, even in me, around me, on me. It wasnt'comming from the speakers anymore. At this point I figured it had nothing to do with the speakers at all and it was like magic.
I was sitting on the ground, almost too confused to think. I didn't know where the ground began and I ended as when I came inside I took my coat of, which I figured had to be my top layer. So I was one with the ground.

This is where it got hard to explain as well; ego-loss. I was just sitting there, but besides my name and birth date I didn't know who I was. I looked in the mirror and saw this person, me. I realized that but I didn't really understand where the lines of the outside of me ended.
I was thinking air was a lie and everything was sticked together. Bright patterns were everywhere and at this point my logic got lost.
I forgot what day and night where, what my school was, who I was, who my friends were and I couldn't remember anything clear. I was just sitting there, thinking: will I ever remember?
This is when I realized I had to remember because no one ever told me they forgot everything. So I thought; hm its ok and went back to the visual field which was too distorted to make sense.
I had to talk to my mother a few times who had no idea about the mushrooms, I said we already ate (not what, ofcourse) and that we wanted to stay in my room. For some reason she agreed to all my nonsense.
The hours following were filled with confusion, bright almost whitish colors and a bending and twisting room in which I was merging.
At some point I started to trip less, I understood things again and except for everything being odly symmetric shining, we went outside and when comming back it was all over.
The total experience lasted 10 hours and it seems strangely unlike my other trips. None of them had the intensity, the insanity, the extreme confusion or the vision field distorted to such a level. I never saw anything that wasn't there, but it was distorted, very badly.

Looking back, if I knew more I wouldn't have taken hawaiians in such an amount being a lightweight ánd sensitive (I trip of 2 fresh heads) I would have never experienced this and I doubt if anything in my life can be thís beautiful.

I liked it so much that I tripped 6 times in 3 months. I have slight HPPD now, now thát is something I can not advice.
Either way, this was something I hope is of any use to what you can expect.

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