Voyagers/participants: A &B Date: 13th February 2004
Timeset: 21:00-21:17 (ingestion)
Dose: 5g dry psilocybe cubensis and 3.5g Syrian rue (peganum harmala) a good source of harmaline which is an active MAOI when ingested. The mushrooms were made into “magic chocolate”, Syrian rue was place in vegi-caps for which we had to compensate for.
Setting: A’s room
At 19:00 we promptly took the Syrian rue in order to be able to take the magic chocolate at 21:00. We had hardly anything to eat but a ham sandwich was ingested at approximately at 18:30.
At 21:00 – 21:17 we drank the magic chocolate and went upstairs to my room. Previously we had arranged a shrine to Buddha and had switched on a lava lamp which was now fully glowing and morphing. We lit up a Nag Champa incense stick and chilled out with Pink Floyd. We felt utter euphoria which was near to being like an Ecstasy induced state, we began to feel heavy and weighted and on listening to “when the tigers broke free” by Pink Floyd we were exceptionally moved and almost wanted to cry.
With the period of non-game ecstasy fading away came the dramatic period of hallucinations (2nd Bardo). As the visuals became stronger the green glow of the lava lamp spread throughout the room, throughout the trip intense red shrouded my vision in short intervals which was fucking amazing as I had never experienced this before. My friend B was experiencing the same effects and as it had been his first strong and subsequent ego-death experience he was awed and inspired in an unimaginable way.
I felt it wasn’t intense enough so we decided to go for a walk as I thought it would turn on external stimulus and make the experience more intense. We trekked half-way up the nearby track and I was fed up so we sat in the middle of it. We then decided to head back for the room as that was the only place B felt safe, and I too wanted to lie down.
My friend and I soon got back to the room and pondered while listening to Enigma. To any one who has not listened to Enigma while under the influence of Psilocybin and any other hallucinogenic has got to do it, I find it lets your brain work through the experience more so than any other type of music and the music is comforting and earthly.
I can only assume that what happened after this point was the Third Bardo as the memories can’t be unlocked that easily. I remember feeling extreme frustration and discomfort but I soon slipped into a visionary state with the red shrouding my vision. The red was extremely beautiful and profoundly ecstatic. To any one who has not experienced the Third Bardo or the period of re-entry and subsequent ego-loss has not experienced the full profound potential of mushrooms. To those that are in-experienced in this state such as my friend B are terrifyingly turned on to a new world that has no meaning as all possessions lose their material value and this subsequent lack of self control and rationality makes the voyager vulnerable and petrified. The thought occurs amongst individuals that killing the human body would make no difference or to kill themselves for the feeling to end. My self being experienced had an extremely profound and enlightening time delving into the cosmic consciousness of the universe. I found myself laughing at the ecclesiastico-politico-financial society we find ourselves existing in. Then a strange irrational feeling manifested itself towards my friend B for not talking and being quiet, on talking with B afterwards or in the aftermath of this profound trip he too had manifested an irrational hatred to the music playing. Thoughts were rushing through my head had and I was thinking the dark thoughts of a mushroom trip, I went through the topic of paedophiles and concluded that it was so fundamentally wrong and ultimately sick. B too was in this hellish state and even more hellish for him was the fact that it was his first experience and during the duration of this he uttered a “thank you” for showing him this state of metaphysical awareness. My lapis lazuli Buddha had provided a comforting icon and was nicely illuminated with candles. Smoking was horrible during the Third Bardo but yet I had to do it for some reason. Visions melded into each other and I was plummeting the furthest reaches I had ever been into the psychedelic realm, thought and reason encompassed my thought strongly reinforcing the belief of the uselessness and backwardness of society. Suddenly at one point a big bang occurred throughout the synapses of my brain, the moment of re-entry had occurred and all that had made no sense to me during the mushrooms experience had suddenly made so much sense, at this same instant B proclaimed “can we do that again.” During this I concluded that life is the ultimate paradox as at one point we have to brace ourselves for a completely different and ultimately infinite reality/realm of cosmic existence in other words death.
On retrospect B explained to me the thoughts occurring through his head through the trip, he said that when he looked out of the window during the trip he strongly considered jumping out the window, this is not a negative response as a result of the mushroom experience as many voyagers experience this as a result of ego-loss never or very rarely does one hear of someone jumping out of a window or any other means of suicide when under a hallucinogenic unless they have mental problem or are not adequately prepared for the experience.
As for the visual hallucinations I did not see as many as I did in the “alone in the dark” experience but this trip was immensely exciting and interesting in a different way.
I think ingesting on a near-empty stomach is much more effective and I do believe that using mono-amine-oxidase-inhibiters a.k.a. MAOIS is the definite way to go to get extremely intense and a consequent ego-loss experience.
I felt completely shot away the next day, yet I travelled into Oxford to get my ear pierced. The influence of the experience was still transcending through me and I found my self looking at an abominable toy town that was so contrived and meaningless.
Thanks for reading, I encourage anyone wanting to experiment with mushrooms on a serious level and to experience the complexities of the human body and brain and the sacred fore-knowledge that exists within us all