(august 2000) Used psychedelics: 2 grams of Hawaiian Mushrooms, a few capsules of N20, lots of Marihuana and some Passionflower. After several trips on several sorts and several amounts of mushrooms, me and my usual trip companion PHOBoS decided to try for the big overdose, a new frontier, if you will. It was a bold idea, and we knew it. We had planned for us to start at my room, in Sittard, Holland, then take the train to Heerlen and hangout in his room. We had planned to leave at the climax of the trip (about two and a half to three hours into it). We thought it would be possible. After drinking a chocolate milk in a cafe in Sittard (we went there so PHOBoS could see the dj-mixer they already had and he was going to buy) we went to my room and started eating the little mushrooms. It took us about one and a half hour to eat them, but by that time, we already found out that we were really in for a heavy trip. Extreme distortion of vision and heavy laughter. I was sitting on my bed and PHOBoS on my couch, a table was inbetween us, and I started to feel as though there was no floor in my room anymore. About one half an hour later I wasn't able to think in terms of words anymore and the only words I could speak were "Wow, Cool, Heavy" and things like that. On PHOBoS' end it was the same thing. My whole room disapeared behind curtains of hallucinations in different layers and all I could focus on were my stereoset, and PHOBoS. We couldn't have real conversations anymore, but I still had the feeling I kind of understood him. Then we decided to both take a balloon of N2O, and we finally completely lost reality and went headlong into heaven or hell, or whereever you'd want to go. I remember feeling that my head was no longer on my body. About an hour later, we decided it was really time to go, but we also had to decide that leaving in this state was virtually impossible. I wouldn't have found the way to the open road, left alone the station, and organizing my stuff was a task that could have taken hours. So we stayed a little longer, hoping to regain some form of order. I finally did, when I came back from a short visit to the bathroom (to pee) and opened the window in the corridor. Nature seemed to have been reinvented and the houses weren't falling apart as I watched them. I felt an urge to get out, and so we climbed on the roof to have another chocolate milk, and of course a joint. That kind of mellowed me out, and after chilling for about fifteen minutes, we left my house for good and headed for the station. We just missed the intercity-train and had to wait for one that would stop at all the little stations. We played some music on PHOBoS' walkman and speakerset, Alan's Psychedelic Breakfast by Pink Floyd, wich started on one side of the tape, and ended on the other. This made PHOBoS think we'd been waiting there for hours, while it really was but twenty minutes. We took N2O when the train arrived and still zonking on it we entered the train and headed for the bike-wagon. Unfortunately the train was crowded and it made me feel a little claustrophobic, especially when a couple of little kid had a small fight and one of them started to cry. I didn't speak to PHOBoS, until we finally reached his house. He was walking around aimlessly and I asked him what his plans were and then he asked me the strangest question: "Am I dead?". He thought he had jumped of the roof at my house, but couldn't remember and that he'd been dead ever since. He looked very scared, and I knew had to do something. He said he was predicting himself and considering his suicidal tendencies I was very afraid I had to stop him from hurting himself. He also said that everything he experienced, he had experienced before, as if life had become a cycle with no end. We tried all kinds of things to get him back to life again, but it didn't seem to have any effects, so we decided he'd try to get some sleep, and I'd crash on his couch with a magazine and keep an eye on him. But he never went to sleep and finally he got out of bed and started to play some records. By this time he felt alive again. After that the trip was nearly over so we chilled for another few hours and then went to sleep. It was the strangest and heaviest trip so far, but although I felt completely out of control, and PHOBoS even dead, it was one of the best experiences of my life too. But I'll have to think once or twice to see if I will do it again. For anyone who would like to try I recommend not to travel a lot during your trip, cause it's no fun at all having to leave, when you feel like you're in another dimension that bares no resemblance with our own. Good luck on all your trips and Xi Ya Später. written by Cowboy Kalira, posted by PHOBoS.