Talking with sam

I live in a small town just north of the US border. I'd never tried mushrooms before, hadn't even smoked pot. I weigh about 150 pounds. me and my two friends, G and R, each had 4 caps. R was the most experienced of us three, having done shrooms and a colorful myriad of other "uppers and downers, dood!"(his own words). We decided to do this in my friend G's room, and the effects came on sooner than I had thought they would have. after about 45 minutes or so I was feeling very wierd... wavy. Me and R started to feel sick, and decided to get some fresh air. G said he wanted to listen to some music with his headphones, because R said music was better when high on mush. So we headed out of his room, and I noticed that all of a sudden, lights were much brighter, and I couldn't focus on anything without it wobbling, or leaving a trail. I mentioned this to R, and he told me that it was normal. He told me to focus on the muscles in my legs, and they would feel like a machine that was breaking down, and running over soda cans. I did my best to follow his instructions, but all I could think about was my cousin Tommy wearing biker shorts, and delivering pizza. We were still nauseous, so we kept going, and as we walked down the stairs, the mushrooms suddenly kicked in full force. I heard a sound like a tidal wave rising up inside me, and then it rushed past my ear, so I turned around, and saw G staring at me, with his cordless in his mouth. His nostrils flared, and he ran at me full force. At first I thought he was wearing a bullfighter uniform or some shit, but then I realized he was in pyjamas. I screamed like a little school girl as G ran at me, and then out of nowhere, R tackled him to the ground, yelling something about the sine waves of the sky.
"aaare you okakakakay? ee? ee? e?" I surfaced from a lake, or at least thats what it felt like. Me and R were at the top of the stairs, and G was nowhere to be found. so we headed down the stairs, and I felt like Mario in mario 64, at the endless staircase. I could see the landing though, so I just kept going, no matter how many waves rushed through my head. eventually we got outside, and we sat in G's couch, which was a car seat that he'd removed from a lemon he had inherited. as soon as we sat down, R tried to prove that we were actually in a car. I began to drive it, even though I've never driven before, and suddenly I _was_ driving a car, the pope mobile! I told R that he was the pope, because jelly don't shake like that, and then he wasn't there. I was scared, because I thought the devil had taken him, and I started moaning quite loudly.
suddenly I saw R leaning over the banister not five feet away, sucking on his shirt sleeve and talking at the same time. I lay down on the floor, and all the colours hit me again, like a rainbow in heat. I closed my eyes, and suddenly I was floating down the river in a giant tire, but the water was white. I was in the jungle, but there were picket fences. suddenly tucan sam floated up behind me in a giant fruit loop. I was amazed, and started talking with him. he told me that he was actually a rare kind of pelican. R woke me up once more, and we went back up into G's room. as we opened the door, which was swirling and bubbling, we walked in on G, who was stroking his bed, and staring at it with determination. He said something, and I couldn't understand him, cause his lips grew mouths and yelled over his voice. I later found out that he thought his bed was a transformer, who was in disguise and whispering that he could make G a real man. I realised I was staring into a mirror, and the candy man was where my reflection should be. It was actually just some black dude, but he kept tapping the window and I ran out of the room screaming. I passed out in the bathroom, and woke up a while later. I was still seeing little floating dots, and wierd patterns, but I could act normal again. we went down to macs, because they were the only place open at 2:30 am in town, and we got some slushies. they tasted better than ever before, and everyone agreed on this. I want to do mushrooms again for sure, maybe a little less, because at times that trip got pretty scary...