Sacred 2nd Time

Okay... I'm going to attempt to describe what happened to me last night. It was an amazing experience, but as those of you who have tripped know, it's difficult to recall in detail exactly what occurred.

At around 10:30pm, I blended about 5 grams of dried Psilocybe cubensis mushrooms (strain EQ) with some OJ and ice. It was a little difficult to get down, but I eventually managed to drink the whole glass.

This would be my second time tripping on mushrooms. I was alone in my house, where I felt safe and secure. After drinking the OJ/Mush Slush, I sat down and rolled a joint for later. Then I read a very spiritual passage from a favorite book of mine and put my headphones on to let the trip start. I felt very calm and ready.

The trip was on me before I even knew it. That weightless feeling slowly took over my body. The music coming out of my headphones seemed to be pouring directly into my soul. I grooved to the music, feeling like I was floating in slow motion.

I had all the lights off, and decided to close my eyes to look for some CEV's. At first there was nothing, but then, as I became one with the music, lines and shapes of different colors flashed beneath my eyelids.

Excitement coursed through me, and an ecstatic smile was on my face. The CEV'S became more and more beautiful. Waves of multicolored, plasma-like fluid flowed beneath my eyelids. I was overcome with intense euphoria.

I lit an incense stick and waved it around through the air. The tracers were amazing, and the smell gave me a pleasant feeling too.

At one point I decided to have a cigarette. Smoking it was very hard... I couldn't even feel it between my fingers! And the smoke tasted like nothing. And then I would start staring at something and forget I was holding the cigarette altogether.

The smoke seemed to dance and swirl in front of my computer screen. It was very mesmerizing. And then my computer screen became distorted and miscolored. It seemed so much brighter, and there were colors where there shouldn't have been colors. And the words seemed to change shape and size, as well as the windows. It was crazy.

I decided to go to the bathroom. I saw that my dad was still awake out in the living room, but I wasn't worried. In the bathroom, I couldn't take my eyes away from there mirror! I've heard of people having bad experiences with mirrors, but this was one of my favorite parts!

My dilated pupils looked amazing when I looked at them up close. My body began to move and change shape in front of my eyes. It was so exciting! Then I looked at the ceiling, and the textured paint began to melt and flow like plasma! I was mesmerized!

All the sudden, I heard my dad moving around outside. I froze! I was so scared that I didn't move or make a sound! But I never freaked out. I just stood there. Finally I heard him go to bed, and I went back to my room.

Here the trip took a sudden change. I felt very tired for some reason and had to lay on my bed. I started feeling really bad. It just came on all the sudden. I lay in my bed whimpering things like "no... no..." and "oh god..."

I kind of felt like the trip was over already... I think I had just gotten past the peak. Finally, it was like I threw a switch in my brain. I went from sad and upset to happy and excited in a second.

This next part is very strange. I sat on my floor and looked around. I knew that I was in my room, but it seemed like I was looking at everything for the very first time! I felt like a little kid. My eyes were wide with wonder and my mouth gaped open with a smile.

I found fun in the strangest things. It was like I was a little kid and everything was fun to play with. I just wanted to laugh and play and have fun.

Then I remembered the joint I had rolled earlier. I felt like I was pretty much down, and I wanted to go outside to smoke and look at the stars.

I realized I couldnt find my lighter, and for the LONGEST time I couldnt figure out what to do. I kept on looking everywhere, and then I would just stop and think. And then I would look everywhere again, and I would stop and think. I kept repeating this over and over until I realized that I was being stupid, and I should just go use my dad's lighter.

Leaving my room was really scary for some reason. I stood in front of my door for the longest time. It seemed like every decision I made was a momentous one.

I finally got the lighter and made it outside. The sky was BEAUTIFUL! There were just a few clouds, with dark sky and sparkling stars in between. When I stared at it, the sky would suddenly seem to change shades of darkness and the stars would shine brighter and twinkle. It was very strange.

Then I lit the joint up, and this was the most amazing part of the trip.

Once again, I could barely feel the smoke in my lungs. But with each hit I took, I seemed to fall deeper and deeper into a different level of consciousness. It was as if I were becoming hypnotized, or falling into a deep sleep all of the sudden

Everything around me disappeared, and soon the only thing I could see was this huge grid of repeating, web-like, fractal plasma globules. They changed color and shape in this beautiful flowing motion.

As I focused on this visual, I fell deeper and deeper into a strange state. I BECAME those plasma globules. I was no longer on the earth, or a living person. I was in a different dimension.

Suddenly my both started breathing very erratically. It felt like my body was doing it on it's own; I had no control over it. I was no longer part of that body.

I started breathing almost like a woman in labor. My breaths became shorter and quicker. Then I started gasping like a man on his death-bed. But I was not scared at all. I did not try to stop it.

I truly feel like I died. I don't know who long I was out there, or how long I stopped breathing. I just remember everything stopping.

And then suddenly, I woke up again. I was being reborn. My bones creaked like they hadn't moved in centuries. I slowly stretched and moved my body, feeling like a butterfly emerging from its crysalis.

Then I gazed up at the stars and was paralyzed by the beauty. It was like I had never seen such a thing.

After a while of prayer outside, I went back in and immediately felt like I HAD to sleep. But even though I was exhausted, I still didn't fall asleep right away. It wasn't until the sun started to come up and the birds started to sing that I finally drifted off.

This was really one of the greatest experiences of my life! I just wish I could remember everything more clearly. The feelings and thoughts and emotions that I felt seem like a distant memory.

I will always remember it as a very sacred experience though. Thanks for reading!

-RS