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Police, Bob Marley, and Non-Human Existence

Well after an entire summer of nonstop partying a friend informed me that he ran across a hell of a deal.



Well after an entire summer of nonstop partying a friend informed me that he ran across a hell of a deal. We drive to Nashville and meet his cousin. After telling her that we had $300 she said she didn't have enough and that we'd have to talk to the grower. We approached a VW van and the doors popped open and a very hippie-looking dude stepped out and exclaimed "Who needs fungus?" Well after talking to him for about thirty minutes he told us at first that an oz would run us $200 but since he liked us that 2 oz would be $250. Of course we went for the latter.

The anticipation built the entire 30 minute ride back to our shitty city but as soon as we got back and divided the shares I was left with about an ounce sitting in front of me. I had 2 friends with no money who had never tripped before. Being the good natured hippy that I am i said well take what you want man. All in all I know I ate an eighth as did my two friends and the other oz had already been spread across the rest of the people there.

One of my friends came inside and told me that I needed to come outside immediately and look at the moon, that something was wrong. I went outside with him and was completely taken by the scene. A full moon with a background not so dissimilar than that from E.T. Well I sat down and we started talking. We were in an apartment complex and two buildings down across the street an SUV stormed into a parking space and about 4 very sexy girls got out. It took us all of 5 seconds in our inebriated state to realize that they were drunk as hell. After they made it into the apartment another car pulled up right next to them. This time a dude got out and he looked pissed. He goes up to the door and is apologizing when it opens and he is greeted by a barrage of fists from one of the ladies. Also intoxicated he falls off the porch while the girl and her friends lecture him about "how to treat your girlfriend." This whole thing goes on for about 20 minutes and screaming ensues. I could think of nothing better, watching this live soap opera, than to laugh hysterically.

Minutes later a 2 carloads of our friends arrive to the already noisy party while the drama across the street continues. About the same time they are walking in the door and I am greeting everyone the inevitable happens. A spotlight shines down the street and a patrol car drives by. Noticing the evergrowing lot in front of the apartment they decide to come and fuck with us. Ok so recap, there are now about 10 people on at least an eighth a piece and 6 thoroughly drunk people in our living room along with another oz of mushrooms that a drunk someone brought and a quarter pound of high grade weed. Plus glowstix galore and one of the little bracelet ones doubling as a collar for our cat Moses.

So seeing the people going into our apartment the police decide to ask us what was going on. My roommate who was just high at the time decided that I didn't need to talk to them even though I had just recated the drunk drama to everyone who had shown up. He approaches the female officer and she asks him if everyone was over age. He said yes and she asks if she can go inside. He said "NO. Unless you have a warrant." Then she responded with "Do you have something to hide." I got this kind of intuition that everything was ok. "I know my friends and everything is already put up." I felt good about it until he opened the door and Moses with his glowing "collar" jumps out in front of her and a guy on the couch who thought it was a joke responded to a flashlight in his face with an unrecognizable noise.

Then the male officer approaches me while I am standing outside wondering what's going on inside the house. At first I try to shake his hand holding an 8th in my pocket. He asks me if I know what happened across the street. Being in the state of mind I was in, I reenacted the scene for him using dialect and all. He says "I knew it was those shitheads." He calls his partner and they both leave to go access the situation down the road. Everyone inside was completely out of it.

Appearantly when she walked inside my girlfriend at the time ran to the bathroom and was trying to decide whether to flush her stash of pot and X or not. She decided not to and opened the door and at the same time the flashlight hit her in the face and she was asked her age. They tell me it took her a good 20 seconds to respond. Well it turns out the cops just thought we were all drunk and decided to leave us alone (neither of them could have been more than 30).

Anyway we then thought it a good idea to go get some X. We get to the dealer's house and he looks in my eyes and says "Damn dude you really wanna roll right now?" About this time I take out some shrooms and tell him that I don't have anymore money. He gladly made the trade but in the process dropped the roll. He had a brown shag carpet and I tried to pick up the roll. I felt like I was a giant on a mud ocean trying to pick up a boat. Well we left there and when we got back the tripping party was in full swing.

I ate my roll and then listened in on a conversation about why my roomate need a piece of paper 4"x4" to write down the word "wow" with the rest of the party. I figured it was ok and went to put in some music. Upon picking up the XBoX controller I came to a place that I can't even really describe. Just complete and utter incomprehension. All of sudden nothing made sense. Someone took it away from me and decided to listen to Bob Marley. About 8 of us were sitting in the living room JaMMin, listening to my friends theory on why we were all there at that particular point in time, when I looked at the enormous Marley poster on the wall. It's the one with just his face in black and white. Well it started to bob like his head was bobbing at me like he was dancing. I wanted to dance to so I did.

I noticed that my roommate lying under the poster on the floor with a look of horror on his face. I sat next to him and asked him if he was alright. He looked at me like a beaten animal and told me that he didn't feel human anymore. That he felt like a lower lifeform (which i have since learned he was right). I just laughed which made him laugh which made the entire room erupt in laughter.

I went to the bathroom to play light tricks with myself and I had to piss. I finished and turned around and looked at myself. I said "dude it's you. It's alex G. And then i gave myself a high five in the mirror. After that I we started a new rolling tradition because someone's glowstick had broken open and we just started slinging it everywhere. It looked so cool that we did it with about four more in the hallway going downstairs. We sealed it off with blankets and dubbed it the starroom. Then everyone (about 14 people) sat on the stairs and we smoked like 5 blunts of some damn good bud. The night pretty much ended with the smoke but I never went to sleep but the trip was to intense to remember parts of. I was told that I talked to a tree, spent 15 minutes trying to eat sour gummy worms because they were squirming in my hands, and that I was crowned the best person to trip with by a collection of my peers.

Anyway the court ordered drug class the next morning sucked because I did my work while I was trippin the night before and the people there talked about all their worst times on drugs and all I wanted to do was scream... "I HAD THE BEST FUCKING NIGHT LAST NIGHT AND I WAS ON DRUGS."
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