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Mind Odyssey. First Experience

I had been wanting to try shrooms for about 6 months, and the other day my friend called and told me that he had just baught 8 grams and asked if i wanted to trip with him.

I had been wanting to try shrooms for about 6 months, and the other day my friend called and told me that he had just baught 8 grams and asked if i wanted to trip with him. I quickly agreed. I went over to his apartment last night and was quite excited, since I have been anticipating this for so long. The visual aspect had sparked my interest, but that was never the main reason why I wanted to try it. I was more curious about the whole "voyage through the inner mind/self analyzation/destruction of the ego/life review" aspect that I have read so much about.
At 7:45 my friend and I both ate 1/8 with some peanut butter. The shrooms actually didn't taste that bad at all... just a little salty but other than that it was ok. We sat down and watched sealab 2021 in his room as we waited for it to hit. After about an hour I noticed a slight body high and felt a little uneasy. Pretty soon we were laughing alot at really stupid things, and that's when I really knew it was finally starting. My friends room was the perfect place to trip out in. He had all the lights off in his room, except for some black lights, and a big blanket that was covering his window that took up the entire side of his wall. The blanket was a mural of little diamond shapes about 3 inches wide, and they were arranged in different colors and patterns. At this time it had been an hour and a half since we ate the shrooms, and I was starting to wonder if it was ever going to kick in. Right when I thought that, something seemed odd about the blanket... and I could not stop staring at it. The white and pink colors started flashing really brightly and each little diamond shape became 3d as some of them seemed to be popping out of the blanket and floating towards me about 2 ft from the wall it was on. I knew for sure my journey had begun then and it was all uphill from there. We were having so much fun with that blanket... it was alive and it was almost as if it was communicating with me as it pulsed and moved. We were having tons of fun but we wanted more so we ate the rest of the shrooms, which amounted to roughly 4-4.5 grams for each of us. My friend then suggested putting on Alice in Wonderland. This was very strange for me, because as I was watching it, I could concentrate on it with my eyes, and I could follow the storyline and listen to what the characters were saying... but at the same time I remember another part of my conscience was embedded deep, deep within my mind.. and I remember even seeing inside of my mind. It was very dark and claustraphobic and very quiet in there. That's when the "life review" began.. and it was scary as hell. I felt as if i had no control over the thoughts I was having now as they were rushing through my mind at lightspeed. All the people I have ever met, and all of my family members were floating by in front of a black voidless background, which i assumed was my inner psyche. I saw their faces and the memories of the times I shared with them. I was then confronted by the realization of how many times I have taken advantage of the ones I love, and the ones that love me. This braught me into a very negative state of mind and I started to think that deep down I am merely an evil person at heart and this started to freak me out. I knew that I had to get out of this before it started to screw up my trip. This was my first time tripping so I didn't know how to control my thoughts or emotions that well, so I decided I would go pick up the guitar in hopes that it might alter my negative mind-state. As I was arranging my fingers in their chord formations on the frets... I noticed that my fingers didn't look like fingers. They looked really short and stubby, and the texture of the skin on my hands and fingers looked like it was computer generated... like something out of a video game. I thought this was really cool and I just sat and watched my alien-like fingers move in wierd ways for a little while. This helped get me into a better mindset. At this moment my friend put on dark side of the moon by pink floyd. For some reason he went straight to song number 6... 'Money'... and that's when things really got crazy.
As soon as the song hit, the entire room started dancing to it. EVERYTHING was moving, colors were changing colors and flashing, the walls were breathing. It was such a powerful and sudden change that I had to put down the guitar and lay on my back on the bed next to my friend as we began staring at the ceiling. It seemed like a nuclear bomb had just gone off in the room and all hell was breaking loose... but it was incredible. shapes would swirl to the rhythm and beat of the music on the ceiling and it was absolutely beautiful. My mind was moving a million miles per hour and i had this gigantic overwhelming feeling. Soon I forgot how I even got in this state.. and I had to keep reminding myself that I had taken shrooms. After pink floyd ended A perfect circle came on.. I looked over at my friend who was laying right next to me on the bed and i remember him looking like he was a mile away from me. the faster and more aggressive the songs would get, the more crazy the room would get. It got so wild at one point that my friend jumped up... pissed off in confusion and yelled "What the fuck!? This room is satanic! get the fuck out! Fuck!" I agreed. We both got the hell out of there as fast as we could and vowed to never go back in... as that room was now a place of mass confusion and unexplainable horrors. We went onto his balcony to smoke a ciggerette. The tree next to us looked like an oil painting on a canvas... yet 3d. It was amazing. I looked at my ciggerette, it was 3 inches long. i took a puff. 2 seconds later i looked back at my cig. now it's 1 inch long. I took another puff. a few seconds later I look at it again, and now it's 3 inches long again... WHAT!? That was when my trip went straight up insaine. It was very hard to walk around, so I went inside and sat on a couch. My friend went back into his room and left me in his living room by myself. I wanted to go back in there with him because he was my only link with reality, but i was too scared of that room still. Suddenly i felt like i was locked into the coach, and everything went white. Time ceased to exist. I couldn't see anything because all i could see was a white light everywhere... and at this point i thought that i was dead. I completely forgot that i had taken shrooms and how i got like this. I couldn't even remember what reality use to be like. All i wanted to do was to be grounded back on my own two feet again on earth in real life, whatever that was... but i was conviced that i was going to be like this forever. i was trapped in this eternal vortex, and because my friend left and i was the only one in the room, i thought that i was the only entity in the entire universe. I thought that I had existed forever, and I would continue to exist forever... but in this chaotic, dillerious state of mind. It was at that time that i experienced the most lonely, empty feeling i have ever experienced in my life. I remember thinking that this is what hell must be like (minus the fire)... it just never ended. my thought patterns were so short and fast and they just kept looping over and over and over and over. There was no reference point for ANYTHING. there was no time. finally my vision came back to a focusing level but i was still messed up. I would look at a table that had objects on it, and then when i looked back at it a minute later and all the objects would have dissapeared. Random objects were dissapearing and re-appearing left and right. I remember walking from one chair to the other, and i would forget that i had done that, so when i sat down i would look back at the chair i switched from and i wouldn't understand how i got from there to here. it was almost as if i was teleported through time and space. If you have ever seen Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and remember the part of the movie from the moment when he starts to get his mind erased, to the very end... then you will know what i am talking about. That is almost EXACTLY what it was like. After that everything started to wear off. In about two hours i was completely sober, and i had so much new information to decipher and figure out. It was one of the most scary experiences of my life, yet at the same time, one of the most amazing. Either way, i look at it as a learning experience. I feel like i know myself better now, and i now know that even though shrooms are cool... they are certainly nothing to glorify. They are a powerful thing and should never be underestimated. well, that's pretty much it.

happy shrooming!

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