Well, this was a very heavy and intense trip. I had only tripped once before, and that trip was pretty heavy, but this trip was much stronger. This was definetly a strong level 4, probably close to level 5.
I cant remember everything and also cant really remember when what happend exactly, so I could miss some stuff.
Well, I planned with some friends to trip on tuesday, January 2 2001. I tripped a few months ago for the first time with 2 friends, who where also going to trip today, and there were 3 friends I hadnt tripped with before.
This time we had fresh shrooms, and I must tell you that this time I didnt like the taste. Me and 3 others where going to eat 30 grams each and 2 where going to set tea with only 15 grams each, they hadnt planned to trip today but we had this portion left.
I was eating them slowly so that the trip woulnd take off to heavy. I already began to feel weird after a few minutes, but that could have been my imagination.
We wanted to see a nice movie, and someone suggested The Doors (about jim morrison (sp?)) and all agreed (I didnt care what movie). I didnt watched much of the movie, but it was very trippy. The sound and colors where morfed and shit so I already thought I was tripping before I really was. Soon I got some paranoya that my eyes where getting damaged becouse of the television becouse they started to hurt, so I didnt watched the TV anymore and started to look at other things. I soon found out that if I closed my eyes I could see funny patterns and shit and it was very enjoyeble. I tryed to watch the movie again but it was just too bright. The tv created very weird shadows on the wall, and I started to watch that for a few minutes.
The room started to get very weird, but I cant remember much of that. Soon I started to look at the patterns in the couch, wich where plants or something. The patterns started to move and it was very weird.
Things were getting weirder and weirder. Before i knew it I was lost my mind and started to think about the weirdest shit. I was thinking what to say to the other "creatures" in the room and how to communicate with them. I started to think about seeing, since I planned to get a visual trip, but didnt really got that. I didnt understand what seeing was, that there was more than thinking. I started to think what it was like if you couldnt see. I asked weird questions to someone else like "is there more than thinking?". I thought that I was the only one that was thinking in this world, and all the others had other things in life. I looked at what I saw (the room) and it was meaningless, just a picture. I began to think about what my interrest where, and I just kept with shrooms and I couldnt think of anything else. Then I started wonder if I was thinking in cirkels serveral times, but I thought I wasnt and that made me very comforteble. But I didnt even knew what a cirkel was. I tried to figure out what the other people where like in the room and placed myself in them. It seemed literarly, as if I went out of my body and went to theirs. I also thought of other people I knew that were not in the room, and somehow those other people brought me a nice feeling
Then I tried to stop thinking and relax, but I just couldnt stop thinking and I was breathing very fast, I tried to stop breathing so fast and that also didnt work.
Soon my thoughts were combined with hallucinations where I was in. Now I was totally lost in my own mind and hallucinations. I was trying to get out of it by going through every thought in my mind I couldnt talk normal anymore and so I was thinking about words and one by one they floated by with weird hallucinations. I also got weird 3d geomatric objects in my head, the patterns I had before had become 3d. I thought about dimensions and if I was in an other dimension, but I thougt I wasnt.
I also had different feelings at the same time and it felt crazy. I also couldnt feel my body right anymore, only that it didnt felt good (bit sick).
I got thinking about insanity and if I was going insane (wich has been bugging the last couple months). Now this was the craziest part in the trip. I saw myself as God, as the center of the universe. I thought that if I was going insane, I had failed and the world would end without completing. But I knew I wouldnt go insane, and that was very satisfying. Then the universe (wich was me) was being recreated and before I knew it I was getting back to earth. I knew how to understand this world again, and realized that this world was very complicated and to understand it I had to think complicated again and then I could think and live in these dimension again. It was as if all the thoughts and hallucinations of of this trip felt togetter and I was being recreated of all these parts and I was back in my body. I, the universe, was recreated.
The trip wasnt completly ended yet. I moved alot becouse I wanted to be normal again, but it didnt really work. I was back in my body again, but my mind wasnt. Everything looked grey and blocky and slowly I got back into myself and I felt fullfilled. Now yellow submarine was on, I didnt knew how long it was on and I didnt watched it at all.
We smoked a few joints and talked a bit, but not much. The only thing I knew of the rest was that they also had a heavy trip, but probably not as strong as mine at all, unfortunatly. It seemed they didnt understand what I had been through at all.
This trip was very fullfilling and it made me feel very confident about myself and I have learned a lot about myself and everything, it wasnt a happy trip, but also not a bad trip. It was mostly right between it, without fear but also without fun.