The night started out perfect, i was prepared and relaxed and ready for another trip into the eternal abyss.
The night started out perfect, i was prepared and relaxed and ready for another trip into the eternal abyss. I consumed 8 grams of Psilocybe cubensis grown on brown rice, the shrooms were fresh and presumably ready to work their magic, if thats what mushrooms think. I always sit at the computer and listen to music with all of the lights off until the onset, staring at the keyboard and looking for a slight strobing of the light from the screen, the sooner the strobing effect, the stronger my trip will be, this time taking 30 minutes or so, i was in for a medium strength trip... or so it seemed. At this point i made my way to the bed and mounted my headphones, feeling confident as i had duct taped my door lock shut, taped a huge sign explaining who i am and what i am on, to the door, and also taped black garbage bags to the bedroom window creating a completely black trip chamber,i took short steady breaths, and relaxed, a sigh...ready when you are Dr.cubensis. The initial stages of the trip were unfolding and i began to get fidgety as always, strange visuals coming and going, intensifying and receding, after an hour i begin the ritual of mock death rehearsals, the first one was like a slight disconnected feel, of unplugging my body and quickly reconnecting, a slight flash from the corner of my mind, then the always uncomfortable mucous breakup in my nasal passages, my lungs begin to numb slightly and surge once leaving a very uncomfortable feeling of having held my breath for several minutes and gasping for my first breath, trying to ignore a document i once read about leathal doses of psilocybin injected into mice, their demise was the result of respiretory failure. Strange as it was all of my strong visuals were open eye as opposed to closed eye from my previous trips, when i looked ahead i could see a structure that made up everything around me, pinkish purple in colour and moving, swirling and seathing, i wave my hand through the air and see the free flowing spirals and spectral soup being disturbed right before my eyes, excitement builds and i exclaim that im in. At this point i usually go into a trance state and begin ego death and dissolve into the universe, but for some reason i wanted to go further than before, i wanted to evolve to a new level in my trips so i had a brilliant plan, i would smoke half a joint and slip quietly back into my trance. Yep, you geussed it, this is where my devine craft loses its wings and makes a firey descent hellbound. I pulled the headphones off of my head and sat up, my hands were sweating and cold, and so was the room, as i felt my way around the room i cranked the heat all the way up, deciding to turn it off after the smoke, when i opened the door my living room looked alien, colours were popping and swirling everywhere and i decided i had better get done with this as fast as possible. As i stood in the kitchen i pondered for a moment going back and said no, just do it, and turned on the light, wow, everything looked so ugly and out of place, i should have washed the dishes i thought, then told myself to shut up and move. I got out the bong and filled it with water, i then proceded to rip open an old roach and placed the resin and THC laden lump onto the screen, an appetizer before the joint i thought and pulled until it was a ghost. Holding the smoke in was difficult, and after about ten seconds i exhaled, this is where things get fucked. I stood there staring at the bong feeling a rush of euphoria overtake me, i said thats enough and quickly turned out the light and went to the the bedroom where i shut the door and lay down, as soon as i closed my eyes i could literally see the two chemicals clashing together and synergizing producing a bright orange wave of patterns and pulsing white flashes with tentacles of red and blue completely surrounding and overtaking my mind, i began to panic and sat up, only ten minutes had went by and i began systematically losing touch with reality consciousness and sanity over the next half hour. Sitting up now the visuals were so intense that closed or open eye was indistinguishable, i was flying through a thoughtscape of structure that followed the same theme sans MJ, only this was outrageously hellish and insanely profound, it was like i was seeing the ultimate evil that the universe has locked away in some corner of consciousness with special reservations for idiots like me, i felt like an ant going into battle with a raging hurricane, only i did not choose to fight. I dont know how long i was under the blanket curled in the fetal position but i remember throwing the blanket to the side and gasping for breath, it must have been sauna like temperatures in there with the heat cranked and the window sealed shut and i began to freak out big time, everything was swirling violently and i remember trying to dig my fingers into my chest in an attemt to squish my heart to kill myself to stop the madness, open heart surgery being a futile attempt i jumped off the bed and fell ripping my curtains and half the garbage bags down with me, this caused the room to light up and confused me even more, i remember sitting back onto the corner of the bed and i popped right out of my body and seen myself from behind and thought, well this is strange, who is that? where is me? whats me, what... and then i popped back in and screamed holy shit! and got up and clawed for the light. Whith the light on now the visuals were reduced to about half, i then lay on the floor with my limbs sprawled out, naked and terrified beyond description, the feeling of dying and being ripped from my body came in waves, decreasing ever so slowly with time, eventually i could walk and stand and proceded to turn on all of the lights, t.v.,computer and everything else in an an attempt to ground myself, it took about three agonizing hours to come back to baseline, a relieved and thankfull little ape i certainly was! After i calmed down i lay on the sofa and played out the rest of my trip, having new insight into the death experience and startling revelations about myself and everything around me, i then tapered off with wild visuals flowing through my mind until i fell into a deep sleep. This was by far the most intense experience of my life, period. the combination of THC and psilocybin had and utterly disasterous adverse and negative effect on me, it is a combination that i will NEVER attemt again. A word of caution to those who choose to smoke weed while shrooming, you may be sensitive like myself, be cautious, i was alone on this trip and it could have ended in serious tragedy, i have shroomed several times since and had excellent experiences on mushrooms alone and i intend to follow that trend for life. Respect the mushroom and spread love. peace. 02/07/02