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Becoming Invisible

last summer 1995, on my second and only high dose trip on p.



last summer 1995, on my second and only high dose trip on p. cubensis, the following happened (i have only had two trips on cubensis, maybe you will see why after you read this):

i was lying outside because the trees and the grass were simply calling me, the weather was HOT and inside was just too much....i was having a rather good feeling bonding with things, my friend was getting an introspective look in to some of his own shortcommings, and somewhat just being distressed himself and distressing to me because he was focusing on faults tht werent really HIS faults, but something that someone had recently told him he should fix....my girlfrend who was not tripping (and has never tripped and will probably be an ex-girlfriend cause of this) was sort of emanating a strong feeling of alarm and total misunderstanding about all of this.....it was sort of like spending the afternoon with a manaquin rather than a person... i was bonding with the land , ....a farm which i am about to close on and buy, and trying to feel it....it is in the middle of blasted strip mined tortured earth, and i could feel the destruction all around me, i tried to explain to that "something" out there that i would not misuse the land, and i recieved the answer that it was in my nature to be destructive, and that it was in the nature of all humans like me to be destructive.....but i also got the images of a great conflagration or apocalypse that is coming SOON, and that we would all be destroyed, maybe not physically, but spiritually, some few of us would fight this, but we would not prevail, the only hope that we would survive physically in comfort would be if we left the earth, but that would still destroy us spiritually because we would be children without parents, essentially a soulless people.

cheerfull thoughts, huh???

anyway, while ballencing this talk/discussion with some semblence of trying to control the giddyness that was washing over me, i was lying in the grass, and my friends were complaining bitterly about the bugs biting them....i looked around and realized that i was sensing and reading the surroundings while i had been lying there, and that they had not been biting me....it was not that they were in communication with me, because if they had been, i would have been about as fair game as anything else, it was that i had essentially been visualizing myself as part of the land...part of the tortured twisted ground that i had been taking with...and i realized that they COULDNT SEE ME...i opened up a "window" to them and ONE SOLITARY FLY came in...took a bite then left....i closed the window and didnt get bitten for the rest of the day....and lest you think i was "hallucinating" :) the next day my friends were covered with welts, and i only had that one solitary welt that my fly i let in gave me...

go figure.

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