On Saturday night I promised to help my roomate have a good trip, he was
a bit apprehensive about eating some cubensis
mushrooms. As it
turned out, he was doing fine, so I ate about 2 grams to get in the spirit
I powdered them in a coffee grinder, and mixed the resulting dust with
orange juice, admiring the green color which results.
Within 15 minutes I was definitely affected, though I was wondering if I
didn't just want to eat several more grams for a "heroic" adventure. I
decided a trip like that should not be so spontaneous. Enjoying what I
had, I put on some extremely psychedelic music (Butthole Surfers double
live album) and watched my tropical fish swim laps around their gnarled
log. Euphoria was everpresent.
I did pull-ups for fun, I was dancing all over the house, these things
are not characteristic of me. I had so much physical energy, it was quite
similar to MDA or another psychedelic amphetamine in this regard. I was
making my roomate nervous by moving so much, so I forced myself to sit
quietly on the couch.
The "organic-snowflake" pattern which I see everywhere when tripping was
quite present. It is a light-colored pattern, like a snowflake or a
paper-cutout, but it is animated. I see this on most psychedelics, but
the "shapes" are different from compound to compound. This time they
were moving quite rapidly.
The white ceiling was a great screen on which to project my
hallucinations. I was hypnotized by the above patterns, and grinning and
laughing with the attitude of a child on christmas morning. I noticed
that if I were to focus my vision a few inches past the patterns, past
the ceiling, I could see vague mandalas in bright primary colors. This
was very exciting, for surely I had not eaten *that* much product...
These mandalas were somehow quite joyous in nature, a celebration of
life and molecular magic.
Of course it occured to me to look "past" the mandalas as well. Sure
enough, about 2 feet beyond the ceiling, I could see white shafts of
light, like sunbeams perhaps. These were also animated, changing angle
and color, but always staying near white. Where these beams crossed
each other were especially bright spots. The interesections, when
viewed all at once, became quite coherent and made three-dimensional
shapes. Most of them were unexplainable, though fantastic. They were
"weaving" themselves into existence, and I suddenly developed a deep
understanding and appreciation for mycelial mechanics. And so these
intersections of light became coherent...
The one image which has a preexisting metaphor was a giant spider web
made of this "mycelium" stuff. Strangely, I was not at all frightened,
just fascinated. The occupant of this web looked like a giant (like
twice the size of a house) dust mite, or some other creature I have
seen scanned under an electron microscope. Indeed, it was a
monochromatic vision, all shades of white and light grey. There was a
host of other creatures, but none of the others were at all terrestrial,
just abstract shapes which implied life. These "creatures" could weave
themselves in and out of existence at will, using the "mycelial
intersections" as their medium. sometimes they would move at blinding
speed, just *appearing*. Other times, they would slowly build
coherency, like a Polaroid picture being developed.
This all took me back a bit, as I still thought I had taken a fairly
low dose. Also, my ego was entirely intact. I had not had the
terrifying ego-death which usually precedes any deep visions I
receive. I knew my name, I knew where I was, I could probably have
talked to a cop if I had to. I decided to use my lucidity to my
advantage and to experiment a bit.
As some of you know one of the main reasons I'm interested in "heroic
doses" is to experience Mckenna's "visible language" or "tryptamine
glossolalia". I've done this, and it works, so I thought I'd play with
it. Other times I have done it, the "hum" just comes out of me, I dont
put any effort into it at all. This time I tried it voluntarily. I
tried to approximate the vocal frequency I've dealt with in the past,
and must have hit it, because a terrifying, electrical bolt of blue
energy leapt out of my body and crawled up the "mycelial web" and was
absorbed by the occupants... I gathered myself and did it several more
times, creating a 3-d pattern of colored lines which were leaving my
body and being drawn into the space above my ceiling. Quite odd I
thought, as I was still rather aware. The dosages required to make
this phenomenon occur are usually so high I do not even know I'm
human anymore. I asked my roomate if he could see the lines I was
producing and he demanded that I stop because I was terrifying him.
As I recalled my original role for the evening, I acommodated his
wishes and took him outside to watch and listen to the rain falling.
I'm left puzzled; I certainly was not expecting these kinds of results
from a dose which last weekend only gave me mild euphoria and reluctant
visions. I'm wondering if my fruits are of varying potency, if I am
becoming more dexterous in navigating through the hyperdimensions, or if
I am just getting crazier...
I'm looking forward to trying this with some rue soon.