Hell

I took a half a bag of shrooms with water. I have taken this amount one time before but it was nothing as intense as this. I even took the previous half bag from the same bag, but I had it with OJ.

My first mistake was I went to a bar anyway things started getting more and more intense and I knew I had gotten way over my head on this one. I asked my friends to take me home and get out of here. I thought I could deal better with this trip in the safety of my own home. The problem was getting out of the bar. I got up and things started getting really weird. Everyone seemed to be looking at me and I didn't know why. So then I thought "oh god maybe I pissed my pants". So I felt down around there and sure enough it felt all wet. So I quickly pulled my shirt down to cover that area. People still seemed to be looking at me though. Finally I got out of the bar and I was in this hallway and time started to speed up. It looked exactly like speeding up some film and cutting out 1 second of time every two seconds. Anyway my friends were saying I did not look so good. The people in the hallway were looking at me strangely as well so I ran straight for the bathroom to try and collect myself and try and grasp this situation. I knew I was starting to panic, and just tried to calm myself. This did not work. I felt reality quickly slipping away from me. I seriously thought I was going insane. The weird thing was in the bathroom I looked in the mirror and I looked fine, although everything was hazy. Usually when I am on shrooms I look completely different. I was also trying to see if I did piss my pants or not, but when I looked in the mirror I didn't see a stain, but I didn't trust what I saw and kept the shirt over top. So anyway I finally worked up the nerve to get out of the bathroom and we all left. When I got home I went directly to bed, hoping I could sleep this off. While in bed I lost all rational and reality for around 3 hours. I think going to bed was a bad idea because I didn't have anything or anyone to ground me. I was sweating profusely and I can't begin to explain what those three hours were like in bed but I really believed I was not going to ever come back to reality. I just wanted an end to this hell I was living.

Though as I came slowly back I had revelations about my life and what was the meaning of life and it maybe even made the trip worth it.

I might do this amount again with water but I will be sure to stay in a place where I would feel safe and is familiar.


Fluid <cnp_jc@hotmail.com>