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Everyone's A Plant!

This hilarious journey in to the underbelly of the divine inebrient was worthy of the following words.

This hilarious journey in to the underbelly of the divine inebrient was worthy of the following words.

About six months ago I visited a close friend (we'll call him C). He had introduced me to shrooms nearly ten years ago and it had been that long since we had gone on a magical journey together. It was due time I returned the favor.

C lived in a small town in Nevada that might be confused for a big outhouse. It was full of those losers we have all come to know and love. You know the types.

C and I consumed about two grams of a fine Mexican cubensis and sat down waiting for that stinging realization that things are just not what they used to be.

As the shroom curtain came down on the show C and I were ready to go get ourselves a big honkin laugh at some other poor saps expense. We walked in to the first bar and within moments we could both barely contain our laughter. Everyone looked like plants. You know, actors in the place of the real thing. These people were to perfectly wretched to be real. It was as if the shroom stripped their last remaining dignity and showed us how they really were.

C and I decided we best occupy ourselves with a game of pool before we laugh ourselves in to a coma. Despite our attempts, we both couldn't help but stare and laugh at these sad symbols of a failed life. I guess the mirror could be turned on us for being so judgemental. Perhaps these people represented all the fears we had for our lives?That but for the grace of God we could be sitting at that barstool like a fat fly over a pile of manure.

Despite the aforementioned reflection we still managed to focus only on the humor in life. I approached the bar at one point and asked for an orange juice. A nursemate to a bottle of JD asked me why I wasn't drinking a beer. With the soberest of faces I turned to her and asked, "Why are you so ugly?" That shut her up and got the bar buzzing about the two "stoned looking assholes" playing pool. C is a huge bodybuilder, so no worries that we might start a fight.

Just when we were about to leave another plant entered via a hidden door we hadn't noticed behind our pool table. This young kid came shuffling in clutching a basket of greasy fries. His fat face and posture suggested a sad life ahead. C and I stared at each other in disbelief. God must have planted him for our amusement. This guy was comic relief in a most painful way.

The particulars that followed weren't necessarily memorable, but the uncontrollable laughter was constant. I have never laughed so much in my life! C and I headed back to his place and just layed around laughing insidiously for another hour. I cannot tell you why the trip was so bent on demeaning other people. It was deeply funny in the most insulting way.

I think the shroom strips away the facade that all humans have. C and I were really laughing at life and how unforgiving it can be. The divine inebrient is God, and through his eyes we see ourselves.

Never stop believing in the shroom! Peace and Love on Planet Earth!

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