1 oz trip report

This is my first time posting on this site and hopefully won’t be my last, shrooms have made such an impact in my life that I hope to be able to share all my experiences as best I can. I live in San Francisco and they just recently decriminalized a lot of psychedelics which has given me lots of opportunities to explore my these magical fungi. I have been doing shrooms for awhile now and I’ve been taking them about once a month about a year ago now. My first trips I started heavy at 3.5 gs for the first few and it was like I had finally opened a door that would have been closed my whole life if I hadn’t done them. 3.5g was a totally manageable amount for me and I definitely had some cool visuals but it felt like I was still on one side of a wall that I needed to cross over in order to reach the next level of consciousness. The first time I did 7g (P.E) was wild, at the start of the trip I was facing some heavy demons and start crying, realizing how requiring I was, I went to my basement which was dark at the time and the little light I did see made it look like everything was on a grid. After I had calmed down I was talking to my mom who is very in touch with her spirituality and it was a very insightful conversation that I don’t remember too much about except that it was meaningful. This trip kind of opened my eyes to the possibilities of large doses and about a month later I remember I was planning to do shrooms soon but something pissed me off and for some reason that made me decide I was gonna take the ultimate dose of shrooms the next day with no real intention in mind except to meet God. I woke up the next morning with the plan still fresh in my mind and drove over to Oakland to buy the goods, a whole ounce of a strain called White Buffalo. When I got back home I started munching on them immediately and I took me around 15-20 minutes to down the whole bag which felt like a whole meal. Just a side note that will be important is that I still live with my family and thankfully I chose to do this on a day when they would be out of the house. I had set up a yoga mat in my closet so that I would be in darkness when the trip started and now looking back I don’t know if that was the best idea. I turned on white noise in my headphones and tried to meditate for around 30 minutes which helped get me into the right headspace but then I remember as the trip started the white noise started sounding like static and getting very annoying to listen to and when I took my headphones out it was like I was in a different world. My closet was almost completely dark except the light coming in from under the door but it looked like everything in the closet was moving which was my mind trying to make shapes with such little light. I started to make out monsters and demons in the back on my closet reaching their hands out towards me and instead of resisting them I reached my hand out and when I did I head the words “you are pure evil” and saw two entities looking at me. I stayed in my closet for a few more minutes before I urinated on myself which surprised me because it was like I didn’t have control over my bladder. This led me to step out of the closet and make my way to the bathroom where I decided I was gonna take a shower to clean myself off and this is when time started getting very condensed. I started getting into time loops where I was in and out of the shower and I can’t even remember if I really took a shower even though I have vivid memories of being in the shower. While I was in the bathroom I had the most profound visuals and thoughts, it felt like I was being sucked into a black hole filled with pain and loneliness where nothing made sense and I would be tortured forever, but at the same time this glowing orb seemed to keep me safe and told me “everything is going to be ok” even if I didn’t believe it. I kept seeing these vibrations throughout the air and the infinity sign kept popping into my head. I was really struggling because I was also paranoid that my family would come home and see me out of my mind and call the police on me and I had this calling to the knife drawer with a very negative energy attached to it but at the same time it felt like there wasn’t anything I could do about it because whenever I would try to change clothes of fix anything my mind would start wandering and I wasn’t able to stay focused. I also kept having these visions of frogs or something pop up In my mind and they were associated with evil or unwillingness to change, I don’t wanna interrupt that too much because I might just be spitting nonsense. I was covered in sweat and felt like something terrible was about to happen and there wasn’t anything I could do about it, I was laying in bed trying to find a way to escape the trip or do something to help myself. I tried playing music to calm myself down and turned on my regular playlist but when I did the music sounded absolutely terrible and didn’t have the regular happiness that it usually did, I remember thinking “I’ve heard this all before” and I turned my phone off after that. It felt like I would be lost in the time loops forever and the sequence of events are all blurry so it’s hard to know what happened in what order but all I do know is that eventually shit started to get back to normal and that’s when my family came home, I was still tripping pretty heavy when they did get home but the hard part was over and I could think pretty clearly. My parents checked on me and asked how I was doing but it was so weird talking to them because their faces were very distorted and I felt like they would judge anything I had to say so I kept conversation to a minimum. After they left me alone is when the light at the end of the tunnel finally showed up and it was like my spiritual antenna was as high as it could go, I was having a full on conversation with the Mother Earth. I remember when I would whisper it would echo and it was like my words were filled with meaning, truth and passion I told her that I would fix her. All the colors in my room were brightly glowing and I when I put my face into my pillow I was playing a video game in real life that was the same I as a dream I had a couple nights ago. I remember something primal awoke in me that day and I started acting like an animal, banging on my bed and acting wild and when I went in the mirror I looked at myself and said “I’m the best monkey”. I know this wasn’t the best description and I’m not the best story teller but I tried my best to sum up all the key points and describe the experiences. I encourage everyone to take fat doses of mushrooms because they can seriously be life changing and hopefully this doesn’t scare you away from them, the trips can definitely be very tough but there is always light at the end of the tunnel.