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almost dying on shrooms


ok so lets start from the beginning when i took shrooms for the first time. From what i remember the tribe was very nice i was laying in my bed and seeing visuals and everything looked saturated and i felt really good i had lots of euphoria. Over all really good trip, so i had finished the shrooms i had and was waiting for someone to sell them and found someone and i bought 2 ounces for 500$ then i took them again for the second time this time it was a bad trip everything felt like it was going to attack me and i felt scared so the next day i took some again not knowing the insane tolerance shrooms build up and i barely felt anything so the next day i had to go to school and i took some in the morning before I went didn't really trip at all just felt like i wanted to love the people around me a little more lol so when the school day ended i went home and took some more (this whole time I've been trying to replicate my first trip experience which i felt extremely good) but this time i crushed them up the best i could not very fine at all but mostly breaking them up with my hands and i heated up some water and made tea then i put the shrooms in the cup of tea i just made and went to my room and drank it. So after a little bit of time went by i started to feel a little weird like i got really cold even when i was under my bed with a heated blanket i still felt cold and mind you the temperature was not cold at all it was normal around the house  after a little of me staying under my blanket i started to feel weak like in my knees  legs and elbows and arms when i went to walk around i noticed it was a little difficulted compared to when i was "normal" and i tried to sleep but i just couldn't.  Some time later i started to feel like i was dying and i could feel my "life energy" leaving me  in fear of me dying i ask my sister to take me to the hospital she did and we went there and got signed up and everything waiting for a doctor to come see me and my parents came back from work and saw that we were not at the house so they called and i said we are at the hospital so they drove here and i had to tell them what i did which was take mushrooms and now i feel like I'm going to die (which i know for a fact i was going to) and of course they got mad and shit so 5-10 minutes later i get called in the room and only one other person I allowed to come with my so my father comes with my and i lay on the bed and the put a thing around my arm and tell me my vitals are fine and everything looks normal which obviously it was not. So i ask my father to tell me about the future for example i told him to say that we are going to leave the hospital and go home and pet my cat and shit like that , just things that talk about the future and are good i know its really weird but when ever he said things like that i started to feel better like my life energy was coming back to me and after some time of doing that he was like "alright lets go home" or something along the lines of that and I said yeah I'm not going to die we are going home so i got up and pretty much felt better. And of course they punished me(im only 18 btw not like a full grown adult) and took my money shrooms away which i actually showed them where they were and gave it to them because I though I didn't want them anymore which at the time i didn't but a couple months go by and i start to get bored and by some shroom chocolate bars and i knew they were real because of the smell of them, smelled like just shrooms and i took one which was 3.5G and waited in my room and i started to feel the same as before like i was going to die so i rushed to the toilet to throw up everything i eat and i did but it already started. I began to feel weak again in my bones and the feeling of my life leaving me  and getting closer to death as time went on. So i told my sister and though it would be a good idea to go out for a walk, so we went out and walked with my dog still felt the same so we came home, and decided to go out to eat so we went out to five guys (burger place) as we approached the place i saw a cute girl and in my head i started to think of a future between me and her, like me first talking to her things go well we get in a relationship etc. and that was really making me feel better like the life was coming back to me but as we got closer and i got a better look at her she was not as good looking as i thought lol so that feeling went away, so we ordered food and went outside to eat and i told my sister to just tell me stories of just whatever so she started talking about some girl drama between her friend group and that kind of distracted me from the feeling of death so after like an hour and  30 minutes for some reason I just felt better so we went to Walmart and i put my ear buds in and music just sounded the best it had ever sounded in my life at the time and we were walking around and i felt confident and not anti social as i feel sometimes which was good but having to over come the feeling of dying which is really scary and not a good feeling at all is not really worth all of that. I just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this or close to it and how i could fix it because i just want to take shrooms again and have it be a normal trip like my first time taking them and btw i still have one shroom chocolate bar left and I'm not sure what to do with it. If anyone can give me advice on how to fix this problem i have with taking shrooms now i would really appreciate it  and I'm kinda scared this is irreversible, i really hope not though because i love shrooms and the insight it gives me on my emotions and others around me its truly a special plant . Also sorry for how bad my writing is I'm not really good and my punctuation and shit like that hope you can bear with me. If you have any advice for me or a solution to my problem shoot me a message or reply to this post or whatever lol im new to this site.

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