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Learning to ride the waves

2.5+unitended consequences

  Being pushed while tripping is all apart of the ride. If you aren't prepared to ride the waves they can in gulf you. I've tripped on many substances over the years including mush many times, at many different strengths. One trip in-particular sticks with me due to the many ebbs and flows based on internal, and external statics.

    Being used to the substance and unable to obtain cid, me and my friend decide to split up 5gs for a dubstep concert. Our ride there oddly enough was my friend's mom who encouraged us to take them before going in due to security. Unsure of it, I oblige knowing we're almost there and my friend takes his. About 10 minutes after getting to the concert we notice comotion while waiting in line; As the crowd does the usual mumbles, I try to decipher what's going on. Before I can assertain as to what's happening the security gaurds in from everyone the shows been cancelled for unknown reasons. As he said that me and my friend exchange looks of paronia knowing we were downtown in a public place about to be tripping. 

   Luckily his mom was not to far and proceeded to come pick us up. By this point we are both getting a solid body buzz and saturated colors as we watch the rain pirouette across the car glass. But as it seemed destined not but 5 minutes into the ride a woman slams into the side of the vehicle. Not really knowing what's going on after checking that everyone was okay I looked at my friend and said we needed to leave now before the police show up. The urge to leave flowed across my body so strongly nothing would have stopped me.

    After a minute or two of walking away at a break neck speed me and my friend begin to panic a bit. Being downtown in a major city just experiencing what we did set the trip into motion. A second wave hits me of a feeling of needing to leave, so we continue to walk. By this point everything is vibrating and morphing around me. Buildings quite literally sway in the wind, and dramatic contrast of city feeling, to opaque earthy visuals clash together. Both of us realizing our set and setting are practically at an all time low for tripping we try our best to calm down. We decide we should eat something in our understandably fragile state of minds. So we stop at a Subway, but before I could even muster up the courage to order I felt like I needed to see my self. 

   We both oddly enough enter a 1 person bathroom together to assess how much we look like we are tripping. To no surprise too either of ourselves, our eyes are giant black velvety saucers. Naturally this does nothing to help calm us down which intensifies the trip more. By now I'm in no shape to be in public as anything I look at morphs down and back before my eyes. The 3rd waves of an intense push to leave hits us both and we dash out of the subway as fast as possible. Luckily my friend dad calls and said he can pick us up now and that his mom was okay.

     This hit us both mentally and calmed us down. It was as if a weight was lifted clearing our minds to a normal speed. But as my brain slowed I realized I didn't even think once as to how his mom was doing. In saying this to my friend he seemed distraught as he realized he was so preoccupied in the trip and waves of fear he didn't either. Needless to say that resonated to us both and we became mute as we began to introspectively think inwards about what we had done. This was a weird place mentally to be in, unable to know wether to be scared, enjoy the amazing visuals, or think about self. Normally I would have giggle fits, the feeling of being a kid again, that coming home feeling.

   After a quiet long ride home,(maybe just seemingly long as I'm still a ) I tell my friend I feel like I need to go home and see my family. Shocked, he looks at me, as for my family does not know I trip. he nodded to me that he understands. By the time I make it home my visuals are coming down a bit, but I'm still mentally a . Seeing my family washes away all fear I have for just seeing what I cared about most made me feel whole again. The last wave pushed me home and made me continue to contemplate all the things I've done wrong to my family and what I can do to be a better son and brother.

    The trip could have gone seriously bad, in fact it did for a short while, but as mush always does, it taught me something. From that point on I never take psychedelics for the visuals or the "high". I take them to ride out wherever it takes me and my unsuspecting mind. I don't fight the negitive thoughts anymore, now I listen to them to see why they are there. Now explaining tripping to someone, visuals are the last thing I mention, not the first. Psychs can be so much more then what most people perceive them as. You just have to rides the waves and land ashore wherever they may take you.

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