5 gram+looping piss

So about 2 months ago I was on my way home from work gazing at the full moon upon my horizon. when it told me "tonight is the nght chester. you are ready". and I was. I was finally ready for another heroic dose.. and my lands it was beautiful insanity at its finest. I first prepared my shrooms by grinding the up in a fine powder and  mixing a little honey in a bowl until I had a nice glob of magic honey that I could easily chomp down in 2 bites and a chug of water. it worked perfectly. I then proceeded to lay down flat on my back on the ground in complete darkness and silence. observing and aware of every thought that flowed thru me. I promised myself I wouldn't get caught up on any thoughts or CEVs I would just them them flow thru me. tt was amazing. I first began to see 2 dimensional shadow figures dancing around in a weirdly shaped triangle  like it was a flip book cartoon. still just going with the flow I felt a huge pressure right in the middle of my forehead like it was a magnet just building up so much pressure. then it popped. I was kind of getting freaked out by now but I still just sat still eyes closed letting it take its course. being as neutral as possible. the pressure than began to move from the right side of my head to the left back and fourth for awhile.like my minds eye finaly got peeled back and it was starting to look around for the first time. I then began to see a shinny octopus like figure with hundreds of tentacles on it.. but its tentacles had faces of all my ancestors. their faces kept changing and shape shifting to other ancestors of mine it was beautiful. they kept asking how my mom was and all that stuff. I simply told them it doesn't even matter what I say because you already know. she's fine. they kinda got a tickle out of that. it was about 2 hours in of me just laying flat on my back surrendering to the unknown when I suddenly had to take a piss. I got up to go piss and the shroom then told me if I wanted to see something great do this.. and yes "do this" meant drink my piss. I don't know why.its gross as fuck  but I did I really didn't mind though because I was on a 3 day water fast so it was pretty smooth. the first one went down smooth. I then layed back down and was in the essences of my best friend that died 4 years ago and my girl friend that died last year both from heroine overdoses. it was so great being with them one more time I started to shed a few tears because this whole time iv been trying to reach them again just one more time and it finaly happened. I then had what felt like an orgasam. begain to shake like I was about to bust a nut but I didn't thank god...I don't know how I woulda cleaned up that mess tripping sak the way I was.lmao so I came back from that and went to take another piss. guess what it was time for...you guess it.... another go around looping my urine. I know its gross but after this time once I swallowed it I walked out of my restroom my god head was awoke. I was aware. aware that I AM. and so are you.. aware that we all have this god head inside of us but we forgot how to access it.i was then aware of all of this grand scheme that we live in. religion. govt. war. money its all a hoax.i always thought I was aware of it until I saw it. we are all connected but something or someone doesn't want us to know this. there is not enough money when there is peace. the god head told me not to speak of this because it  would sound crazy to most and the word GOD has a bad rep. I understood. I was so excited that I was accessing this god head of mine I felt in such control........ so it was time to piss again. 3 times a charm right..as soon I a gulped it down it instantly regretted it. I then begain to die. I fell down knowing what was about to happen. I blacked out. became one with everything. collective consciousness, I was tapping into random peoples consciousness I didn't even know just seeing different points of view from everyone and everything.it was beautiful and scary I then came out of that and that proceeded to happen what felt like 12 times in a matter of 30 mins... 12 ego deaths... it became to the point where I thought I was going insane and death wasent real and I had total control of everything that there really wasn't any point in anything anymore because I already new what the outcome was going to be......that became real scary for me..i was then trying to remember who I was and trying to comeback to reality(the fall from grace.huh?) but I turned on the tv to watch a show and I already new what was going to happen in the show that I never watched before it became so scary...knowing everything would suck.. I now realize there is no point in trying to control anything and know everything...... and I truly feel sorry for people that are like that. I was the told I didn't need psychedelics to access this state of mind and I'm perfect in everyway just like you all are but there can always be room for improvement and there truly is hope for everyone.even the shittist person on earth there is hope for them and we all will go thru some sort of chaotic journey after we die or some might not depending on how we lived our lifes, some might call it "hell"  where it will feel like etermity. but it mightl only have been 1 minute of real time before you see the light at the end of the tunnel.and are free. if that makes sense..I was honestly a very cynical person before this trip. still am somewhat by no means am I perfect but I had never had an experience like this before on shrooms. iv had ego death experience but nothing compared to this. i use to trip 2 times a week. iv only tripped once since then on a very small dose nothing compared to this and no piss looping either lol there will be no more of that hahah I didn't believe in god really or anything like that but all I know I was with something that showed me a lot of fascinating things. it took me about 3 weeks to come back from this trip and get my head right.but I needed that experience and am thankful for it....I am very aware of things now more than ever.. nd ilove it but it can also have its dark side.... I'm sure you guys understand.