Death, god consciousness and the center of the universe
So I've been doing heroic journey's for the past 8 months or so--once every few months. My first trip was with freshies and I am pretty sure I weighed them incorrectly as I stuck a bunch in a paper bag in the fridge instead of drying because my drying system was taking too long and had a planned evening and didn't want to be off course. I weighed out what I thought was 60g of wet but didn't take into account that they had already started to lose weight in the fridge. Point is, I think it was closer to 8g (took a picture and counted 25 fresh mushrooms on the plate, which I ate with chocolate pudding). I had a bit of an ego loss and total distortion of reality. I did see my entire childhood and realized I created my own suffering. Issues I held onto were gone. I share this because my later dosages of 5g (dried) did not give me the same insights. Just a feeling of total confusion but I knew I was tripping at least. A few months ago I did 8g and experienced what I think was "death" and it was beautiful. I remember having the choice to come back to my body. i also did a 6.5g trip and I learned that life was all about this human interchange. Seeing that my the bigger doses had greater teachings I decided to go even bigger. Well, Friday night was one of those massive doses.
Before I get into Friday night's trip I should preface it with a few things. First I'm a life coach (or rather, I facilitate self-directed neuroplasticity) and I am dedicated to doing the work myself to raise my own consciousness. Also, I have been rereading a book from many years ago called Power vs Force by David R Hawkins (the underlying determinants of human behavior) and have been playing with the muscle testing to calibrate levels of consciousness. I will say that my trips in the last 8 months have raised my consciousness level from 450 to over 500 hundred (the trip two months ago taking me over the 499.9 precipice). I have also calibrated (afterward) what the highest level of consciousness I experienced during my last trip was and it was 1000, which is the highest ratable level). I share all this because I used the same muscle testing to dial in the appropriate dosage for me to learn the best. What I came up with was 9.3g. Now maybe me using this muscle is just mental masturbation and I'm just seeing what I want to see but either way, whether it is conscious, subconscious or part of mass consciousness, it is a fun way to play.
So I started this by making a lemon tek tea and drank at about 7:30. I took a big bong rip and sat in my bed blindfolded with my Beats headphones on listening to David Parsons. I got clear with my intent through meditation and asked the mushrooms gods to go easy on me but teach me what I need to see, feel or experience. It started to hit at about 7:50, which is consistent with other tea experiences (about 20 minutes to hit) and I did this on an empty stomach (5 hours after last meal). By I think 8 or so it started to hit me hard. Entities started to show up. I turned off the music because I couldn't hear was coming in. I kept being directed to turn my head to my left and finally realized I was being directed to take my watch off. Once I took my watch off then it was off to wherever. I know I left my body. It's all still a bit fuzzy right now but I do remember seeing how I create reality every second. I could think of anything and be experiencing it in real time. I also could see that I was everyone else I knew. I couldn't tell the difference between me and someone else as I would morph into anyone. It was like I was pure consciousness and every living being was the extension of that one consciousness and I could extend myself into their more singular conscious experience. I do remember being at the center of a huge white light as if I was the center of everything and nothing at the same time. It was the sense of death again and being in the presence of god or source. On the other hand I also experienced this sense of monotony about how everything kept unfolding. Not sure what to make of that yet. Maybe that had to do with my current life and it's occasional monotony. At some point I realized I was seeing through my eyelids. It didn't matter whether I had my eyes open or closed and the blindfold came off. I eventually started to come back to the awareness of my body and was in a state of total bliss. I had turned on the music again and it was guiding me to various states and experiences. Joy. Love. Sadness. I remember feeling like I needed to cry for all the times I didn't let myself in the past. It was sad but it wasn't. It only lasted for a short time and felt really good to honor that part of me. Not long after that my headphones started ringing. It was my "phone a friend" checking in on me. She hadn't heard from me in like 4 hours so she got worried I was lost even though I told her I will be lost. Anyway, not sure how I answered the phone or how I was talking with her through my bluetooth headphones. This experience pulled me back into reality but I was able to stay in bed for another half hour before wanting to experience other things (food, dancing, even a glass of italian wine). I do recall just wanting to connect to someone. To sit with them and just be with them and myself. The urge was sooo huge. I should note that one of my intentions was to learn more about my relationships. I got what they were about. It was about connecting. It's like connecting with someone else is connecting with another part of yourself. Have had a chance to interacted with a few people yesterday and it was amazing. So very present with them. Couldn't have felt closer to the girl I am seeing. I also saw a client (I do manual therapy as well and I was afraid I'd be a little slow the next day (saw her at noon) but I was sharper than ever (even after staying up until almost 4am). I will add that my last trip before this I had the experience of information being downloaded into my brain and found insights coming to me for months. I would think this would be similar. The rest of the night was spent watching led zeppelin live performances like In My Time of Dying and Kashmir (especially the No Quarter performance with the egyptian orchestra). I couldn't stop watching the performers feel their music and express themselves in that way.
Well, that's all for now. Just felt like I had to document this! Oh, and I calibrated myself when I was coming down and at one point I was 650. My current calibration two days later is 524 (if that really means anything). That was fun!!