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Shattered(7g dried, third trip)

7g dried trip report

Hey all! First Post here, and this is the report of my third mushroom trip, with 7g dried of goldcap mushrooms. This took place about 1 month ago so ill do my best to remember details,.  This was the most terrifying yet most amazing experience of my life. This was my third time doing mushrooms, the first times being 1.1 and 3.6g , nothing worth mentioning happened therefor i underestimated the raw power of the psilocybin mushroom. And so i shall begin to recount one of my biggest adventures into my mind. It will be a bit long and starts off slow but imo definetly worth the read.

I receive 14g of dried gold cap mushrooms from my friend, Along with some Ak47 and Another strain of which the name i cannot recall. 
My friend, That i shall from here on refer to as K,  Texts me asking to come over. My first mistake was deciding to trip with someone i barely knew. The house is to myself as my prents left for the week, and im left with my brother who i had a great psychedellic experience with, my first acid trip.( he is much older in his 30s) but thats a story for another time.  I tell K i have some shrooms and he tells me he may take up on the offer. Hes set to arrive at 6. In the mean time, i make the mistake of getting stupidly baked.

K arrives.  He decides to partake in the trip, And my brother decided to stay sober(thankfully).
After arguing wether or not to eat before, we decided not to as ive been fasting all day. At this point, we begin scaling the shrooms and due to my impaired judgement, decided to go a bit overboard. K eats 1.5g dry, while i eat around 2g dry. I decide this isint enough, and proceed to make a lemon concotion by adding around 3g to a small saucer of lemon juice and then stabbing the mixture repetably with a knife.  I down the foul tasting mixture, and begin to eat more shrooms,  without counting, and what ended up being around 7.0g in total. Now everything was going well, K rolled a few joints as we soon wouldnt be able to, and we proceeded to go smoke it. This is where it gets interesting. I already feel the effects pleasently creeping up, a tingling body sensation.

Friday------ *Around 7:15, as of this point, time begins to get blurry and unmonitered*
Upon finishing the joint, K notices i lost a joint, and says something about my parents finding it. This makes me uneasy and i start searching for it, but find it difficult as a huge drunk like feeling takes over me. Are things getting wavy? is it my imagination? i continue the search and give up, although feeling very uneasy. We decide to watch tv.  I put on, Into the cosmos, and begin to watch it, amazed as how the tv looks 3-d.  I realize it is definetly kicking in. The more i watch the more it becomes 3d, growing infront of my eyes. At this point , A wolf jumps around snarling on tv, freaking me and my friend out. He then points at th painting on the wall commenting how freeky it looked. Apart from swaying and bubbling nothing looked frightening. 

Friday--- Time unknown. The peak. (T
Where am i. Im in my room. i dont know how i got there. I dont remember how this phase started, But when it hit it hit. Everythin was a blur. I couldnt see my body. I still who i was. Everytging was rippling and morhping and bending. A giant blur of events happened to which i cant recall or make sense of ,  order didnt exist so its diffficult to recount. i walk downstairs and start experiencing every death i can think of, but more in my head than actually, like a dream. Gruesome deaths. I also begin living the lives of others , A buddhists, a christian, etc. i spent the whole time running uo and down the dtairs to my room, to the tv room. I do not recall but K said he was trying to get me to lie down and call down after i said something really disturbing along the lines of " were all going to die anyways, why dont i just die now".   I run down the stairs as soon as k leaves my room , tugging on the picture of trees hung on my wall,  and then the image of thor flashes into my head. Im filled with the power of a god, or so it felt. This is where i suffer from what i belive to be complete ego death.  I shout, and my voice feels so powerful, like its smashing through multiple dimensions. Speed lost meaning, i felt like i was moving at light speed. Reality didnt exist. I thought i owned a gun(i dont) and yelled at my friend because it wasnt in my back pocket. This was a moment of call i experienced, i felt impowrred and lived he life of a gangstar at this point.  I begin drawing on the wall woth my finger, my finger leaves a beautiful trail of rainbows, but an extreme sense of panic overwhelms me.  My friend k doeset know what to do and is sitting down this whole time taking to my brother, laughing.   Now i forget who i am. I think i died and i feel at this point that death isint real, i grab my moms car keys(they left one car) andstepped outside barefoot in the snow staring into oblivion, i wanted to drive, and i literally rhought i wad dead and can drive however i wanted. My friend takes the keys and tells me to get inside, starting to get concerned. I get inside and begin punching the windows, as my mind kept jumping through the glass and i just wanted to be outside in the nature too. I looked down at my chest and saw a scar from
my neck to stomach,  which a friend of mine has, and experienced the heart surgery he went through.  I open the fridge, and my
mind and body is made of glass. I shatter, it felt like i broke in peices, physcially and mentally.  I go into the tb room, sit down next to k but feel the cabinet which is high ip on the wall against my head, i think that im tripping but my k tells me to get off and i look down and realize im standng on the couch. i go to my room and my brother comes in to try to help and im overwhelemed with question, death is scaring me, i see everything a organisms in a cycle, i scream to him questions such as " What is god" is god real?   i was so overwhelemed. i believe i began crying.    He put on music, and ifreaked out as it sounded so terrible at the moment.Everything is such a blur, and my one of the few moments of peace was when my
mind teleported to a beautiful field, that i called valhalla.    Hot and cold didnt make sense, i justdidnt understand.  There was moments my brain would rocke into space. i witnessed the walls bleeding. i experienced scitzophrenia, i was screaming for help , i tried giving k my phone and all my possesios(which he declined) to make it stop.   my brother now went to bed i believe  so  i go o the tv room, ttake a bite of an apple but look down and its a glass! i began teleportng, totally lost in my house. Im moving at hyper speed. I knock a glass over and get caught in a loop of the same event for years. i see entire day cycles going by. I witness aurora borealis(northern lights) in my living room. I nowbelieve iam  god. I begin creating objects in my hands, amazingly. The idea of money disgusts me at this moment. How will this help me get out of this bad trip or help me acheive happeniess? money is useless. i hated the conecept. I now ask K if its possible for all these horrible things to happe. i then ask him if the possibility of happiness exists. he says yes. thats enough to make me
feel so much better. i go back down and sit on the toilet with my pants on , and fel theough my floor over and over fo what felt like eternity. I watch the room around me disintegrate.  time destroying everything.  A motion ididnt understand(time) keeps pushing me forward in a chain of events. I realize the control we have of our lives, and how we can accomplish anything. i start feeling better. I imagine my muscles growing and watch in amazement as my arms swell up and as i grow. My arms begin showing. i see blue electronics and puleses of electricity going through me.  Whatever i imagne happens. I was sure i was insane.  All of a sudden reality came back. My name! i yelled. i started screaming out info about me as all of a sudden it came back. Im alive!  i look at my hands and see blood all over, in reality there was some blood as i was terrified to the point of chewing my fingers till they very slightly bled, nowhre as extreme as i saw.   Colors were still shifting, everything still morphinf but i felt so relieved i almost cried out of happiness. My brother wakes up to talk to me, and everything is now HD, so clear, colors so bright i cant explain, beautiful. I felt a extreme peace, i went to lie down watchin my walls morph in hd, takig to my brother and being so thankful about life.  My name. i know it. i couldnt describe th joy i felt.  I look at the beautiful rainbows i see coming from my lights. i dare not turn them off yet.   My brother goes to bed, and im left pondering this impossible experience. i forgot to mention  The most  uncomfortable thing was the physical discomfort and pain. i tried meditating. music. lying down. nothing could have helped a inexperienced tripper like me in that situation. Although i defiently feel some damage has been done mentally, this trip helped me overcome
my stim "addiction" in the next few weeks, i also received a immense appreciation for lifee, sanity, and health. It pushed me to develope more respect for my parents,  to get new friends, and taught me that a web of possibilities exsist, and even tho negative ones exist, the most beautiful and amzing possibilities exist. We  an acheive beautiful things, it just depends which way we steer ourselve with the mysterrious illusion of time propelling us.Although   I didnt respect the shrooms , and they kicked my ass, the important thing is they taught me, and made me begin my journey to see just how deep the rabbit hole

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