Warning: this is a long ass trip report, apologies, but there's just a lot to talk about and SWIM would like some advice from seasoned trippers if you can find the time to read it. Thanks ! :D
SWIM would like to share his first experience with 1.5 tabs of acid with the community. (He thought he'd taken it before but it turns out he was deceived with 25i :/)
So, SWIM's mate Jason finally gets a free house for a week, and they'd been talking about tripping for a while so they thought fuck it. Another mate of theirs said he'd bought some panda blotters, so they all convened in the morning for a full trip. They were pretty excited, and although Jason took a bit of convincing to get over his nerves, the popped a single tab each. They started watching Tarzan and SWIM remembers it being pretty emotional. It was fun, and they were all enjoying the warm fuzzy come-up. It got to the stage where Jason couldn't watch and he almost started crying it was so emotional, so they took a break and went outside for a cig. The sun had just come out and SWIM remembers feeling really good at this point. It wasn't the spiritual cosmological adventure people had told him it was, but he was having fun. They decided to take another half tab because at this stage they were pretty much peaking and felt that they could trip a lot harder. SWIM forgets what happened next, but at some point in the next hour, his mate told him that they should go smoke a joint, and that they'd get higher than they'd ever been. SWIM was feeling adventurous at this stage, although SWIM's never loved weed. He remembers seeing the grass outside and it being beautiful. There weren't any real visuals, but there was a sort of pulsating pattern wherever SWIM looked. After the first joint, the clear high became slightly foggier due to the weed, although SWIM hadn't really noticed yet.
At some point it was decided that another joint should be smoked. That's when shit got real. After finishing the j, the lads went inside and sat on the sofa, trying to play Child of Light. SWIM couldn't understand the mechanics, but his mates seemed to be having a good time. Gradually, as the weed kicked in, the trip intensified. SWIM turned on Blue Planet on mute with Dark Side playing over it. It was really trippy, and it definitely felt more like the acid he'd heard about. There were moments when he had no idea what he was looking at, there were just these weird patterns. Then, a shot panned over the moon, and they all looked at each other and shouted Dark Side of the Moon!!
This is when it all went to shit. Unfortunately, clearly two joints had been too much, and SWIM and his mates started tripping out big time. It was really fucking intense, and SWIM remembers feeling almost completely disconnected with his body at times. It felt like him and his mates were just three separate minds riding this massive wave of intensity. SWIM was walking around, freaking out and he could barely feel anything. He felt like an alien in his own body, and it was terrifying. SWIM realised he was having a bad trip, and he started getting really paranoid. SWIM's mate who said he'd done acid 12 times and did a lot of drugs said he never wanted to do drugs again. That made SWIM realise just how crazy this experience was.
Every now and again SWIM wondered if he was in hell, or if he should go to the hospital, as he really felt like he was losing control. His grip on reality was fading, and the trip just wouldn't end. His mates started talking about how, despite this shitty trip, they should try to truly connect as individual minds, but tbh it was too intense to be able to focus on anything. All he remembers being able to say was 'it's just like one massive step back, a look at the bigger picture'. It really wasn't so much about visuals, but when he closed his eyes or focused on anything, some crazy shit happened, like some weird watercolour blotches. They went upstairs to a blacklight room with UV trippy posters, but it didn't help at all. It was fucking awful. After a while they started to come down, and although the experience was humbling, SWIM is deeply disappointed that his first experience with LSD (was it even LSD? They checked under the blacklight and couldn't see any visible glow) was so terrifying. SWIM thinks he's handling it well, though, as at least he and Jason are in the exact same boat and they can talk this shit through.
SWIM would like to mention that a few days later they decided to reconvene for some MDMA, and had possibly one of the greatest nights of their lives just rolling and listening to music and chatting.
Is acid not for everyone? Was SWIM just really unlucky? SWIM thinks that it was probably the weed - either it was too strong or laced or something, since the following day Jason threw up after smoking a third of a joint. Even then, the acid wasn't that good before, not at all the spiritual adventure he'd hoped for.