Due to my last tripping experience ending in disaster I hadn't tripped for approximately 3 or so months. I also hadn't been able to get any mushrooms because I threw out my cakes and shrooms [during my last trip :) ]
On the Wednesday before I had obtained just over 2g of shrooms packed into gel caps. I had decided to take them with one of my friends, on the Friday (20/04/2001), at a party at my house (organised by my older brother). I picked up my mate from the train station and returned home. We ate the caps at 8:13pm, then chilled out.
At 10pm I still had't felt anything and decided the caps were really weak. Taking a different approach I went and smoked a cone. About 3 or so minutes later the trip kicked in extremely fast and hard. Time suddenly slowed down and my body felt like it was in a jelly-like substance. The sudden onset of the trip set off a really mild anxiety attack with my heart racing and my breath coming in short breaths. I stood up amazed at what was happening around me. The bricks of my house had started crawling like worms (appearing to rise out and tunnel back into the walls). The trees and bushes around me had all started swaying slowly. I went back into my house and lay on the couch listening to the music with my eyes shut. On the back of my eyelids, various coloured pixels formed different shapes and spun around, all in slow motion. Triangles morphed into circles and were overlayed with squares and so on. The music started to annoy me with its volume so I went back outside and sat around, my mind spinning and covering vast territory.
Lying down my mind began reflecting on my level of happiness and life in general. My frustrations with university, overuse of drugs, and reminscient thoughts about my ex-gf weighed heavily on my mind. Feeling down and uncomfortable among the various people (who I didn't know that well) I retreated to the computer and went on the internet to chat to a fellow tripper (who wasn't tripping at the time). I told him my trip was filled with lots of negativity and he greatly cheered my up (reminding me I was tripping and that I should be a happy tripping man :) ) After trying out some various mp3s I settled on Mandy Moore - I Wanna Be With You (having never normally listened to it) and was blown away. The wallpaper in our computer room is a coloured tartan pattern and the lines were swaying and moving about in the most amazingly beautiful way possible. For about 10 minutes I lay on the ground next to the computer in complete awe, feeling like I had obtained a sublime level of spirituality. The entire room was alive and slowly pulsing in time with the song.
After spending some time doing this thoughts of the party returned. I went back outside but quickly returned as it was raining and I still felt uncomfortable. Talking again to my friend about the negativity he suggested perhaps they (the mushrooms) were trying to tell me something. I agreed having come to some conclusions during the course of the trip.
Upon saying goodnight I went to my room and went through items my ex-gf gave me. Reading cards she had given me brought tears to my eyes as I remembered the happiness of the moment but also the sadness of having it come to an end. I felt content knowing we had shared something beautiful. A guy I had met that night, knocked on my door and asked if I had any more speed. I didn't but he stayed and related the story of him and his girlfriend and how they were going through a difficult time. I was moved again.
After he left I walked out finding almost everyone had left except for a few of my brothers closest friends (who were rather stoned and drunk). I ate a cripsy green apple and strawberries and spent a few hours hanging out with them laughing and enjoying myself.
I woke up the next morning feeling extremely content and happy at the beauty inherent in life and nature. At no point in the trip did I laugh or feel amazingly happy but I feel as though the mushrooms have made me realize certain things, as well as showing me sublimely beautiful things that I still feel moved by today. Tripping is a magical experience....