So this is the story about my first trip. I'm mostly writing this all down for my own sake so I can try and remember as much as I can (so I apologize that I go into so much detail about everything), but I also wanted to share my experience with others in hopes that it would inspire people in some way. Anyway, hope you guys enjoy the story of my first trip! If you want to skip all the extra info at the beginning and get straight to my trip, I'll put a note where it begins.
Yesterday, I tripped for the first time. To say I had been anticipating this moment greatly would be an understatement.
I'd been trying to get my hands on shrooms for almost a year, but never had any luck. Last summer, some friends of mine went to a beach near us and took them, but I wasn't able to go. I was really bummed cause I was super curious about mushrooms and really wanted to take 'em and my friends came back and told me how great it was. They had only taken about 1.5g each, so they weren't tripping super hard, but they said it was a great experience. So we tried to get our hands on some a few more times over the summer, but every connect we had fell through. Needless to say, I was quite upset.
But finally, we met a friend who sells and he hooked us up yesterday. We got 12g for $110 (a little pricey, but shrooms are hard to come by where I'm from and they were quite potent).
It was myself and two other friends who wanted to trip, although we offered to some other friends, but they weren't interested. One of my friends was quite experienced with shrooms so it was good to have him there (we'll refer to him as "J"). The other friend was one of the guys who was in the group that went to the beach last summer and took 1.5g, so he was also somewhat experienced (we'll refer to him as "M"). I had done tons and tons of research, knew I was in good company, was in a comfortable environment (my house), and was unbelievably excited, so I wasn't nervous in the least bit and had no worries of a bad trip.
So we picked up the shrooms and went back to my house. We opened up the bags and I took a little whiff. The best way I could describe the smell was like a dog that hadn't been bathed in a while haha. Not the greatest smell, but I didn't care. I was too excited to care. We had each bought some sandwiches at a sandwich shop called "Jersey Mike's" and we put the shrooms in those. I had a philly cheesesteak and could barely taste the shrooms in it.
Before I ate mine, I got everything I wanted to have for the trip. I grabbed my guitar, some incense sticks, put my "On Letting Go" by Circa Survive vinyl on my record player, ready to go whenever I was, and then ate them.
We ate the shrooms around 5:00pm. After we ingested them, we sat around talking for a little while. A couple friends showed up and we hung out with them. We had about 1-1.5g leftover and offered it to one of them, but he said he didn't want them (even though he took them later, but we'll get to that when we get to that haha).
At about 5:30 we decided to go sit in my backyard and chill and wait for the shrooms to kick in. There were six of us there (three who took shrooms, three who didn't). We all just talked for a while, laughed, made jokes and whatnot. One of my friends (the one who said he didn't want the extra mushrooms, we'll refer to him as "P") was drinking margaritas that we had made the night before and he got a little carried away and drank like 4 haha. I had brought the incense out there cause we all love the smell of it. We also brought out some art supplies (pens, paper, paint, canvas) and started drawing a bit. The wind was really bad and kept flinging shit all over the place, but we just started using whatever we could as paper weight.
*THIS IS WHEN THE TRIP BEGINS*
Right around 6:00, P had to leave for a bit to go drop off our other friend at her house. The shrooms hadn't quite kicked in at this point, but we could tell they were starting to. I felt kind of light-weight and everything looked different. Not noticeably, but it just looked different. I can't really describe it. Around the same time P left, the body high began to creep in. I felt a tingly sensation from my knees down and began to feel even more light-weight. Colors slowly became more vivid, but it started out in a very subtle way. Then at around 6:05 or 6:10, the real trip began.
J put some music on for us (some really trippy, chill electronic stuff). It sounded amazing. He had this little pod speaker thing that hooked up to the bluetooth on his phone. We each took turns grabbing it and putting the speaker on our hands to feel the vibrations of the music. It was such a weird sensation. Then we all began to get this feeling of peacefulness and joy. Around 6:10 or 6:15, P came back and I was like "dang dude, how long were you gone? It feels like you were gone for a while" and he was just like "I was only gone for about 10 or 15 minutes, bro!" and I got up and gave him a hug and told him I was happy he was back. At this point, time was way too hard to tell. The beginning of the trip felt like it lasted a while and I was so happy about that.
We sat around and listened to a little more music, drew a little more, and talked. Another friend of ours showed up, he also didn't want to take any. Him, P, and another friend went inside to play video games. So it was just me, M, and J outside. We were all starting to trip pretty hard at this point. M went inside to go to the bathroom real quick. Me and J just sat outside looking around at everything. Colors were amazing. I had some sunglasses on and was able to look at the sun without it really hurting my eyes. The light from the sun was incredible. I could see a bunch of rays streaming out from the sun and there was a cloud floating past it that had a rainbow tint going through it. It was breath-taking. I let J wear my sunglasses for a little while and he was freaking out too. I found out that looking at light sources (the sun, lamps, just lights in general) with sunglasses on was way cooler, but everything else looked better without them on.
M came back and was telling us about how trippy the mirror in the bathroom was. So I proposed that we go inside and look at this giant, sliding mirror that's in one of the upstair rooms in my house. We made it up there and stared at the mirror for a few minutes. It seemed like the mirror went on forever. Like I could reach in and touch everything that was in there. J didn't want to stay too long because the first time he took shrooms, he had a bad trip because of mirrors so we left the room. We got to the stairs and it looked like they were waaaaaay high up. But it wasn't scary. We all walked down stairs and went back outside. We listened to music some more and it's at this point that I took notice of the clouds. Watching them move was the most amazing thing I've ever seen in my life. The sky and clouds almost began to look like a kaleidoscope and it looked like clouds were popping up out of nowhere. If I focused on one cloud, it was like I could see every inch that it moved and every time it moved, it left an exact copy of itself behind. It looked like the clouds were duplicating themselves. As I was staring up at the clouds, I became hyperaware of the tension in my neck from looking up and my neck felt super tight. But I couldn't look away from the clouds. It was just amazing.
I looked around some more and everything just looked so detailed. Everything almost looked like it had a defined border around it like in the game "Borderlands." Everything was so interesting to look at.
Then I looked over at the grass and it looked so green. I decided to get up and touch it. The feeling was weird, it's almost like the grass didn't feel real. It felt like plastic or something artificial. I told J and M to come touch it and they thought the same thing.
We went back and sat down and I just looked at everything around me, amazed at how beautiful everything was. I closed my eyes for a little while and looked in the direction of the sun. The light that came through my eyelids created a red tint and then black, geometrical shapes began forming and moving around. It was crazy.
I went back inside real quick to grab my guitar and came back out and just started playing. It was still just me, J, and, M outside and the music I was playing was just really soothing. We were having a great moment between the three of us, but then our other three friends who weren't tripping came outside and that kinda killed my vibe. Them being there made me really uncomfortable and irritated. Not enough to make the trip bad, but it just frustrated me that they kinda ruined the moment. I got over it and kept looking around. J had to leave around 7:30 which was lame, but the trip carried on. Two of our friends went back inside to play more video games while me, M, and P stayed outside. P told us that he ate the 1.5g that we had leftover (me and M were gonna split it, but we didn't mind). But then we remembered that P had been drinking a lot and got worried that the shrooms and alcohol wouldn't mix well at all.
P handled himself well at first, so we all just went back to drawing and listening to music and such. M decided he wanted to go inside to draw and chill with our other friends. Me and P stayed outside and drew some more and then talked for a while. At this point, the shrooms had kicked in for him. He was tripping hard and didn't really know what to do with himself. He would look around for a few seconds and then start crying and talk about how beautiful everything was. Then go back to crying some more haha. We started having some pretty good conversations and then I had the impulse to go touch the grass again. I couldn't get over how weird it felt. I told P to come along and he touched it and we sat there for a little while talking. He said the grass tickled his hands and I said "really, it tickles?" And then he just busted out laughing for what seemed like no reason. I chuckled a bit and asked him why he was laughing and he said that the way I said "tickle" was funny and at that point we both just completely lost it and couldn't stop laughing. The laughing would shortly subside then we'd look at each other and start laughing again. It was great.
Then he randomly saw the lemon tree I have in my backyard and said he never really liked lemons and I said "dude, then let's try something new. Let's do something you're not really used to doing." So I took off my shoes and we walked over to the lemon tree. The grass felt really strange on my naked feet, but I liked it. We got over to the lemon tree and the smell of lemons overwhelmed me. It was such an amazing smell. We each picked a lemon and brought it back to the table we had outside. We started peeling them and there was lemon juice everywhere. They were the juiciest things I had ever seen. We finally got the lemons out of the skin and started eating them. Juice was filling my mouth and it was the most organic and juicy and natural thing I had ever eaten in my life. The sour sensation felt so weird in my mouth, but strangely enough it wasn't nearly as sour as it is when I'm not tripping. I started salivating so much though to the point where I could barely keep from drooling all over the place. My whole mouth was tingling at this point.
After that, I had to go inside and pee. I went to the bathroom and looked at the mirror for a bit, but I had been warned by my brother not to let myself get stuck in bathrooms, so I left pretty quick. M and my other friends were in the living room and I talked to them for a little while and then remembered I left P outside. I had told him earlier that I would be his buddy if he started having a bad trip cause he started freaking a few times and I had to calm him down and bring him back to a good place. So I ran back outside. He was alright, but he was glad I was back. We talked a little more, then M came back outside. I asked if they wanted to go walk around my neighborhood and they were both up for it.
So P and M put their shoes on (I decided to go barefoot) and we just started walking. There's a tree across from my house in my neighbor's yard that I've seen almost every day of my life, but this time it was the most beautiful tree I had ever seen. I just looked at it and was like "I've seen this tree so many times, but I never realized how beautiful it was."
We kept walking and just looking at how gorgeous everything was. Green colors were everywhere and they were all so vivid and saturated. We walked past one of our friend's old houses and started talking about how weird it was that he doesn't live there anymore. P kept freaking out asking where we were and we told him to just chill, me and M knew where we were. We turned onto one of the streets and it looked like it went on forever. But it was such a nice street. Trees were everywhere. We got about 75% of the way down the street and then P just lost it. He kept saying "I need to go back, I'm lost, I need to go back, I'm lost" and we kept telling him to come back but he just kept walking away from us. So M and I were just like "whatever, we'll just walk behind him and keep an eye on him." He was a pretty good distance away from us and then a really old friend of mine that I hadn't seen in years walked out of his house. We made eye contact and said hey and he walked over to talk with us. We talked for a little while about what's been going on in our lives and such. I feel like I did a pretty good job of composing myself and not seeming like I was tripping balls. We said our goodbyes and then realized that P was still walking off while we had been talking. P winded up walking back towards us shortly after my conversation with my old friend ended and we asked him why the fuck he ran off. He said he didn't know where he was and just wanted to go back. So me and M walked him back to my house and then continued on with our walk.
We walked through the greenbelt outside of my neighborhood that is also covered in trees. I realized how much I love trees on this trip. And it's a lot. Anyway, we came up to these two benches that sit along the trail and M said "those benches are there for us" and I'm just like "it's like those benches were placed there for this very moment in time. Like on some cosmic scale, those benches were put into their existence for the sole purpose of us one day coming along to sit on them." I said most of this in a joking manner, but it was a strange idea to think about. That got me briefly thinking about how tied together all the events of our lives are and whether or not there's some cosmic plan for our lives and the universe. But M and I ended up talking to each other about life and where we were in our lives and the dynamic of our friend group and such. It was a really great conversation. Definitely brought the two of us closer together.
It started to get pretty cold so we decided to walk back to my house. We got back and we decided to clean up outside and enjoy the rest of our trip inside my house since it was nighttime at this point.
This was the first time I started experiencing the effect of breathing walls and stuff which was super cool. I grabbed some headphones and some incense and set up my own little zen-like corner on my couch. It was very relaxing and peaceful. I found a video on YouTube of a kaleidoscope sort of thing and there were colors everywhere in it. It was hypnotic almost. But so beautiful. I started playing with the incense stick and watching the smoke move and twist. It was so interesting. Everything all day had been the most interesting things I had ever seen in my life. It was like looking at the world for the first time. Like being a kid again.
Then I put on some Sigur Ros and closed my eyes. I was having some really interesting close-eyed visuals, but it was all really dark so there wasn't a whole of definition of shapes and stuff. It was kinda like an area of light that had shapes of red, green, and blue that were dancing around, but it was surrounded by a circle of black and the colors weren't super vivid. But it was still really cool.
I remember saying to my sober friends how much I wish they were experiencing this. And I kept thinking that everyone in the world needs to experience this. And then I thought about how the reason that drugs like shrooms are illegal is because they free your mind and allow you to see the world for more of what it truly is which limits the control that government can have over us. Which may be a bit conspiracy-esque and probably isn't true for the most part. But the thought was there.
I needed to get up and pee again so I went to the bathroom, but this time I wanted to stare in the mirror. I loved mirrors. They were so strange, but so fascinating. What happened in the bathroom was probably my favorite part of the trip.
I started by just looking at myself in the mirror and thinking "so this is what I really look like, huh?" and I actually was really comfortable with how I looked. I've always wondered what I looked like through other people's eyes and I feel like I was actually ale to do that. It's like I wasn't looking at just a reflection of myself, but I was actually looking at myself. I know that doesn't make any sense, but that's how it was. It was like I was looking at me through another person's eyes. Like my reflection was actually in the room with me. I remember staring at myself for a while watching as my face morphed. My eyes would start melting or moving apart. My mouth would do the same. At one point, I began making faces at myself and just laughing. Every now and then, I'd make some creepy-ass faces, like almost scary looking, but I would just laugh it off. Then things got really crazy. I have a cousin who I've always been told looks a lot like me, but up until this point I never saw it. But as I stared at myself in the mirror, my face would begin morphing into his face and I suddenly saw how similar we look. This next part though was the absolute best, most emotional, most helpful, most eye-opening, most life-changing moment of the trip and quite possibly of my life. As I was staring into the mirror, half of my face became my brother's face, which is weird because my brother and I don't look all that similar. But we just stared at each other for a while, straight-faced, pretty serious. (A little background info, my brother is 11 years older than me and so he wasn't really around a whole lot when I was growing up. For a while, that made me really sad and I always kinda held that against him because my father left when I was young and he was one of the only male role models I had in my life). Anyway, as we were staring at each other, he started talking to me saying that he was sorry he wasn't around more when I was growing up and that he loves me so much and that he's so proud of me. I felt this overwhelming feeling of forgiveness coming from me and I felt like I had resolved that issue with him and we could move on and strengthen our brotherhood. Which is great because we've actually begun getting a lot closer recently. But after he told me those things, we stared at each other a little longer and then just started laughing and laughing and laughing. Then my friends were yelling at me to come out of the bathroom cause I told them to come get me if I was in there for too long.
So I came out and told them about what had happened. At this point, I was beginning to come down. I put some M83 on in my headphones and started drawing again. Not anything in particular, just drawing lines and such. I was so focused on drawing. Not really anything could break my attention from that. But I eventually got tired of drawing and wanted to just chill with my friends as I came down. So we played Super Smash Bros. and enjoyed the rest of our night. And that was pretty much the end of my trip. And that was pretty much the greatest day of my life. And my life is certainly changed.