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First Trip

Felt overwhelmed, but still a nice time

Around mid-July, I took roughly 2 grams of dried cubensis covered in honey, at about 7:00 am. Even with the sweetness of honey, the taste was pretty horrendous, so that kind of put me out for a while.

After playing some Ico for a while,I started to get come up anxiety and realised that I wasn't really too keen on tripping that day. Nonetheless, I tried to calm myself down and go out for some air. Stupidly, I was walking around the landing while holding a glass cup,which I dropped and had to clean up, only making me even more nervous about the upcoming trip.

At 8:00, I actually started tripping. I was slightly nauseous, but not enough to actually feel sick. I spent the first part of my trip outside, looking at the boards of the house,which seemed to keep moving left and right. Since it was a little after sunrise, the whole backyard was filled with lots of yellow, green, and brown,which seemed to be intensified by the visual effects. Laying on the picnic table, I watched the clouds expand from cirrus to cumulus and move around the corner of my vision. The air felt really nice, in retrospect; although it was July in Texas, it was actually kind of cool out and not too windy at all.

After a while, my thoughts started to get worse (I'm not usually the happiest person) and the anxiety came back. I started to wonder if I were the only person existing in the world, and I got worried that I had forgotten what the concept of other beings were. I knew that my roommate was still asleep in the other room, but I needed to know if she was actually alive. I walked in and made some dumb excuse like "hey did you get any juice, yesterday?" just to confirm that there were other people who could think.

Despite that, I still felt overwhelmed by things, so I went to my room and put on "The Visit" by Loreena McKennitt, while laying down on my bed. Closing my eyes, I started to see this X-shaped visual perpendicular to my vision, folding and moving into itself. I did feel a little better by this, just enjoying some good music and watching the room ripple like water.

Sometime close to 9:30 or so, I went over to the living room and continued work on a painting I was in the middle of doing. Not even thinking about what I was doing, I started putting little white dots and dashes over the larger shapes, and added in some bubbles around the picture. I worked on that until the comedown started and I began to get my regular mindset back (almost).

I had read about comedowns being uncomfortable and crazy, but I had no idea how I would feel during one. For the most part, I could form rational thoughts, but it felt like someone else was thinking them and I was just listening in. I was afraid that I was going to stay like that forever, but I decided to give myself a day and see how I felt after I had a night's rest.

Fortunately, I was finally back to normal at roughly 11:00 and oddly, I felt completely amazing after the trip. Not as though I were a new person; just in a very good mood and felt like I was ready for the day. I probably shouldn't have done this, but I drove my roommate to the post office about an hour after I fully came down. Thankfully, I didn't get in a wreck, but I couldn't stop talking about how I had "a really crazy dream."

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