It is now two days after the trip and I'm ready to give back to the community. I had been excited to do shrooms for a month before, so I had done extensive amounts of research as to what to expect and what to avoid. First of all, I highly recommend this to anyone looking to trip for the first time. Do all the research you can and know what you're getting into before you do something like this, because it really helped me in the end.
My two buddies and I (we'll call them X and Y) were to meet at X's place at university (as Y and I are taking the year off to work) on Saturday and were planning on doing it that afternoon. I ended up showing up on the Friday, so X and I had time to hang out. That night at around 6:30, we went and picked up 6g of shrooms for the 3 of us to have the following afternoon. X and I, however, got a little antsy and had a little sample while we walked back to his place. At the time we didn't have anything to wash it down with, so we just ate a couple of stems dry from the bag. I particularly didn't enjoy the taste or the texture, but it wasn't completely unbearable.
When we arrived back at his place, we took a couple more, until we had both had about 1g each. We took some ginger pills I brought to stop any sort of nausea that I had been warned about (which actually worked extraordinarily well) and put on some jazz and lounge music that X is really in to. I laid down on the bed and stared at his ceiling, trying to pay close attention to any visuals I may have been experiencing, but there wasn't anything really. We ate a little bit more out of curiosity. At this point it had been about half an hour since we started. Slowly, my body started to register the high. It was like I felt light and heavy at the same time. It was the lightness of being stoned, with the heaviness of being drunk, without the unfortunate burden of being drunk. I stared at the ceiling, and suddenly, I felt it in my head. It was a tingling feeling, similar to when one stands up too quickly. And as I felt this, the bed felt like it was rising and the ceiling looked like it was swelling down towards me, and I burst out laughing. I had read so many stories of people smiling and laughing as the first sign of being high, and I didn't think it would be this sudden and intense. I laughed, and in turn X laughed, and that made me laugh even more. I was honestly laughing at nothing, but I was in hysterics. It feels like you're vomiting laughter, and once a little bit comes out, it doesn't stop. I laughed for about 5 minutes, wondering why I was laughing so hard, before I needed to get up to go outside. It took 3 tries to get out of the door without laughing uncontrollably (as I didn't want to walk into his roommates the way I was). On the way to the door, I looked into the mirror and saw my dilated pupils. They were noticeably larger, and I felt like I couldn't look away. My eyes looked big and clear, like I was really seeing into them for the first time, it was a peculiar feeling. I also looked up at the ceiling and noticed that the pattern was moving. It was like one of those optical illusions where you look at a point in the picture and everything else around it starts spinning.
We finally made our way outside and walked about 5 minutes to a patch of newly planted trees next to the road. It was a really foggy night, and the car lights looked really vibrant through the fog. The sky was a lovely pink colour which only looked better with the drugs, while keeping it reasonably bright out for what I imagine was about 9:00 at this point (I didn't really keep track of time). We took the shrooms with us and indulged a little more in the clearing, enjoying the breeze. The taste did not get any better, but at this point it had totally been worth it, so we kept going. This walk didn't last too long, we quickly went back to X's place.
We went around back to the small parking lot behind his building. While he went inside to grab a guitar and some Mary Jane, I laid down on the pavement and threw on Waterfall by Skorge (it was part of a playlist I had made for the trip the following day). I got lost in the music and looked over the next building over. It was moving back and forth, making it feel like the building I was next to was moving in the same way, giving me the feeling I was floating on water or on a boat and everything was rocking. It felt so good to lay down. X came out of the house with the guitar and started playing when my song was done. I closed my eyes and listened to him play and I thought it was the most beautiful music I had ever heard. With my eyes closed I saw some wild stuff. It was so much geometric patterns, but more of a series of very brief events, like a montage of strange images. I embraced them all, as strange and dark as some of them got. I opened my eyes at points, only to find out that I saw some patterns in my vision in the sky, which became quite overwhelming when I started to think about space and the cosmos. I closed my eyes again and let myself listen to the guitar. It was an amazing sound, and he also has a great voice to match, so it was just a pleasant experience. I stood up after I decided I was done exploring the visuals. I had developed double vision at this point. When X stood under the only light on the outside of the building illuminating the lot, I really noticed how vibrant the colours were.
We decided to head inside, as it was 11:00pm and the League of Legends World Finals were starting and I had been wanting to watch it. Tonight, however, I had seemed generally uninterested since the shrooms had kicked in. I felt like there were better/more important things to do. We still headed inside however, and I signed onto my laptop and headed to LoL and Facebook. Y, the friend we were to trip with the following day, was online and talking about the Finals. I felt bad about doing the shrooms with out him (as we were supposed to have our first times together). He could tell I wasn't sober too, so I panicked and quickly shut my laptop mid conversation. I was also feeling very uneasy being inside, so I asked X if we could head back outside. After a couple of minutes we headed back out, as he was doing stuff on his laptop and we did more of the shrooms. Something about being inside was just really bothering me and I had felt so right being outside.
We went for a walk, and the fog had gotten more invasive, and our surroundings had a really fantastic aura about them. I looked at a traffic light and the red portion was bright and bigger than normal. I described it as the colour trying to escape its little hole. As we walked, we noticed something. There was nobody outside. This was Friday night, in a small town with two universities down the street from one another, and there was an absolutely mystifying absence of people out. There were lights on in windows, but we didn't see a single person in the windows either. The cars were sparse too, and while terribly confused by this, we were euphoric at the thought. It honestly felt like the world was accommodating our trip by leaving us alone, it was amazing. We walked about 10 minutes, and while it had felt like an eternity and that we had walked miles, we had barely gone anywhere at all. The ideas of space and time just ceased to matter, it was all about the present moment. It was dark out, so the colours weren't very visible, but I walked by a tree under a light and I just had to stop and stare at it. The colour wasn't even fantastic, I was just mesmerized by the beauty of the tree itself. It looked more 3-dimensional than usual, which makes no sense. It was like I could see a fractal in the tree and I couldn't look away. X pulled me away from the moment and we continued along our walk. All the while, my mind had been going off on different thoughts of varying emotion. The thoughts were going so quickly through my head though, that I had no time to get emotionally attached to them. I thought about my ex-girlfriend, my trip, my job, my weight, how happy I was at the moment, and everything in between, but it was like the thoughts were just running through, and I wasn't terribly bothered. I thought I'd be upset if I thought about these things (which I had tried to avoid), but I didn't have time to be upset. We looked at the bag and realized we had eaten almost all of the shrooms, so we finished them off and decided we'd get more the next day.
We finally arrived at a park, where we found the first person we'd seen in a long while. He was just passing by though, and we took a seat on a bench, hidden in a patch of trees. The was a stream right in front of us, and at the time I thought it was the most beautiful and tranquil place I had ever been. The city was completely silent, and all you could hear was the water. It was bliss. I looked up at the leaves and lost myself in them. The spaces in between the leaves that revealed the light of the sky turned into eyes that all looked down upon me. It wasn't frightening, it was rather interesting to note and to wonder why the trees were looking at me. I knew I was tripping, but it felt very real to be watched. I told X I'd be back, and that I was walking over to the tree. He laid down on the bench and threw on some more jazz.
I walked up to the tree and felt so drawn to it. I looked at it first and thought I saw a face on the trunk of the tree. Even though I realized it wasn't a face, it still felt like the tree was looking at me and calling me. I put one hand out and touched the tree and my body felt like it was welcoming me. I put my other hand on it, and it felt like my hands were being enveloped by the trunk of the tree. I thought I was becoming physically attached to the tree, and I felt that it was right and I didn't fight it. I felt so emotionally connected to it, and like it was breathing energy into me. I grasped at it as the feeling grew stronger, and it felt like a sort of love was being shared. I reached out and hugged the tree, and it felt like I was hugging a person. Not in texture, but in emotion and attachment. I thought the tree understood what was going on and didn't want me to let go. I thought about life, and Earth, and how small we are in the grand scheme of things and how we are all connected. I thought about ultimately coming from the same source as the tree and being a part of the life on this planet. I felt primitive and simple, and I guess this is where the ego disappeared. The connection was a huge part of it, and that knowledge just made me so happy and so appreciative. That's really the best I can describe it. The music was a very sad sounding piano piece, and I just felt like I wanted to cry. It felt so great though. It was like there was a bond that I've only felt with people I've really loved.
I returned to X on the bench after a while, and he didn't question a single thing that he saw. It was like he understood, and possibly felt the same thing with the scene and the music. We decided to head over to the park nearby. And still, there were no people. X's music still played, and he really just picked the most beautiful songs he had (or at least they sounded like them). There was only one swing at the park, so I sat down while he swung, and I felt truly euphoric. It was the most amazing feeling. I still felt light and heavy, but my body and mind just felt completely clear. I was so open and carefree and I never wanted it to end. The ground was extremely comfortable for mulch. X told me to get on the swing and that it was the best feeling in the world. I wondered how my happiness could be improved at this point, and the swing totally made that happen. It felt like I was flying. And we bonded, over how something so incredibly simple could bring so much happiness to us. I mentioned how propaganda shows shrooms in a terrible light and makes it seem like an extremely harmful drug. And we laughed over this, as we were having the best time in the world. I laughed at the thought that I'd been forced to believe that I would lose my mind if I took shrooms, and here I was enjoying everything much more than I think I ever have. It took the simple things and made them into the most important/significant things. The music, the swing, the tree, the weather. The simplicity of the nights events was mind boggling for how much of an emotional attachment I had to them at this point. The fog was gorgeous, and the sky was a rosy pink. And there were still no people. It was the most surreal moment of my life. We discussed this idea, that a secluded forest somewhere with beautiful scenery would be perfect, but a very real kind of perfect, while this night was unbelievably perfect in less than favourable circumstances. It was like a movie.
We were coming down at this point and quite tired, so we headed back to his place. The colours were returning to normal, but the thought that we just experienced that excited us, and we were happy knowing that no one can take that night away from us now. So really, it ended up being more about the emotional journey than a visual stimulation, but I'm glad it ended up going the way it did. Because really, it's supposed to be a journey. That's why it's called a trip.
I originally wanted to do shrooms during the day to see the colours change and go wild, but I regret nothing about the night trip. It was unreal. I feel extremely close to X now that we shared such an amazing experience together, and I can't help but feel a little separated from other people now, as they really aren't aware of what the simple things are capable of doing for a person. They don't understand, and don't want to understand, so I can't help but feel a certain dissociation, but I'm sure I'll get over it at some point.
I could not have asked for a better first time, and while I feel bad about not waiting to do it with Y, I regret nothing. If we hadn't had done it that night, I wouldn't have experienced the best night of my life in terms of happiness and a connection with the world.
Would I recommend shrooms? Absolutely, but know what you're getting into. Do your research, make sure you're healthy enough, make sure you're with people you are completely comfortable with, and do it somewhere you feel completely comfortable. I can't stress doing your research enough, but if you do, you could have an incredible experience.