Before I begin, a tiny bit of background...
(i also apologize for the length of this report, I like to be very thorough in explaining how i felt & also am kinda a writer :p)
Ganja: smoke it errr'ry day. Cocaine: stupidest drug on this planet (and very overpriced on a side note). Magic Mushrooms: this was my second trip...
I also take klonopin every day for anxiety, which is a change from my prescriptions of my last trip (i had none...)
My boyfriend and I had been saving a little baggy of some potent looking cubes for a day such as this... hot, boring, no car, no money, no cable, no weed, NOTHING TO DO. I was a bit worried that the stressful & annoying situation we were in would fuck with my trip and turn it downhill, but my boyfriend had the idea that "no you'll forget about all of that once you start tripping!" and right he was.
Boyfriend (will be calling him simply boy for the rest of this report) popped the shrooms before i did, a few hours before in fact, and began tripping his nuts off while sprawled on the floor laughing at my curtains. I asked him how he felt and he looked at me like this O_O, then started another round of the giggles. I was waiting to eat mine until my mother showed up to chat as I didn't want to be tripping around her. She was taking forever though, so I ate those suckers :) by the time she got to my apartment, i was beginning to feel the first effects. I started getting very odd feelings; it was almost like some wave of... SOMETHING was flowing through and out of my body. I became completely engrossed in organizing a bunch of tiny rocks into a crack on the pavement when my mother said "are you alright?" I look up at her and she looks somehow different than she had a second ago; she seems to be melting? or flowing down into the ground? "gotta go" i said to her and went back into the apartment.
"I thought you'd NEVER come back in!!!!" boy yells as soon as i get in the door. He says he's tripping kinda hard but is having a great time. As the minutes ticked by, i began to get an increasingly uncomfortable feeling in my head; ".......my brain is expanding." i stood up, and my head ballooned even more out of control... literally. My head felt like it was a balloon getting pumped full of air. I kept relating this to my boyfriend but he didn't really know what to say about that, until i told him "there are strings on my eyelids and they're connected to the kitchen"; "YOU'RE TRIPPIN!" But it really did feel like this strange invisible strings, almost like puppet strings, were hung from the kitchen & attached to my eyes. It made me laugh, hahaha, laughing feels good, my god SOOO good i've never realized how good laughing feels... so let's laugh some more. GIGGLES!
My trip continued to strengthen in intensity while Boy's remained pretty much the same; i'd eaten almost twice as much as he had so it's understandable. The room began to feel extremely weird and uncomfortable and threatening; every time i would look at the ceiling i felt as if it was going to suck me into it, i actually felt this "sucking" sensation. Boy was talking about... something... but all i can see are the fractals coming out of his mouth synced with his words in shades of pink and yellow and orange. "wow... this is cool..." i was thinking, because on my last trip i had barely any visuals, it was just a complete devastating MIND FUCK. Boy said "yea" and ripples flowed from his mouth, okay this is getting intense, Boy flails his arms around while explaining something and "HOLY SHIT I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE. I'M TRIPPING MY ASS OFF"
Five minutes later, Boy & i are walking barefoot down the side of the road, geeking out at everything. Everything was just so THERE for us to see, like i would look down at my feet and see the blacktop underneath them with all the little stones in it, and i thought "i've never actually SEEN anything before this." that's what it felt like. Everything was the way it should be, everything was beautiful even if it was broken or messed up, and holy fuck, sounds were like nothing i've ever...heard...before. A car door shutting from some random driveway would cause us to whip our heads in that direction because the sound was just so THERE. I remember feeling like the spirits of dead hippies were with me, i'm sure there's been many a legit-hippy tripping barefoot outside ;) at one point during our first walk, Boy looked into this half opened shed and instantly became rigid with fear; he said he'd looked into the hole of that garage and it gave him a feeling like he was going to die or be murdered. Interesting what things can trigger fear whilst tripping...
After walking barefoot along the road for about an hour, Boy wants to go back inside but i CAN'T because i know i'll have a bad trip again inside that apartment. So we make consent to run in, grab supplies, and then make a journey to a local park before the sun went down. I remember feeling like this was exactly what i was supposed to be doing that night; that night was MADE for Boy & I to be out tripping in it. I love how your senses are heightened under the influence of psilocybin; while walking under power lines that we usually wouldn't have even noticed, we heard an extremely high pitched & annoying ringing sound... "dude... you can HEAR the power lines!" Boy listened for a second and then his eyes lit up and he exclaimed that he heard it too. Cool shit! We got to the abandoned park right as the sky turned to deep navy blue and the first stars were beginning to come out; Boy & i sat on the swings and i thought about life. I thought about all the horrible things i'd done to my family in the past few months, mainly my mother, and thought about how ridiculous it was that I had been wanting to trip again so badly for so long.
"Maybe tripping ISN'T supposed to be fun..." i said to Boy. Which I never would take a psychedelic for the purpose of "fun", i take them to have a different perspective on life. As soon as i uttered the words, I felt that "bad trip" vibe come over me, and it was hard for me not to cry as we sat there among the crickets and stars and monkey bars. I realized that my first trip had scared the absolute SHIT out of me, and that to me, tripping was something terrifying and sort of the ultimate thrill. Something only the most bold at heart can conquer. This realization led me to another realization; that my drive to trip again had been so bad because I wanted to overcome my fear. & that was not accomplished during this trip. It was much less scary, much more trippy.
I don't remember the walk home, but once we got there, i started coming down... and let me just put it out there that the comedown on shrooms is absolutely HORRIBLE. i felt like my skin was being ripped off of me, and every 5 minutes or so i would get this wave of a feeling that i literally couldn't stand; it felt like my brain was boiling. I sat on my porch and came down a little bit for about a half hour; Boy was pretty much back to normal by now (he'd eaten less and earlier than I) and was eating pizza. "how can you possibly be eating..." i remember thinking. The thought of food in my mouth seemed so ridiculous to me for some reason. We tried watching a movie but i felt too weird and was definitely still tripping too hard to be able to concentrate on it much.
Now for THE SEX PART!
Let me just make a disclaimer that for ME, sex on shrooms is something to never be repeated. Maybe not even something worth "trying once". I would literally forget that i was having sex while he would be inside me; and when i remembered, i had very disturbing images in my head of distorted sex. It felt extremely animalistic. The entire time Boy was pounding away I was just staring at the pretty purple and red and green and pink designs i was seeing in the dark. Boy flipped me over roughly and couldn't find me for some reason... I became annoyed & asked what the hell he was doing, he said "I have no idea, what ARE we doing?" the sex just didn't feel right. I felt like some demon fornicating with another demon and it was scary and dark and twisted where my mind went during that sex. Has anyone else had sex while tripping? I've read a few reports where they have, but the other experiences for people seem to be much more euphoric than mine O_o it also fucked with our sex life after that, so we've since agreed to not fuck while under the influence of any psychedelics. high sex? all day. trippy demonic sex? no thanks...
The scariest part of this trip, and is the thing that still haunts me, is my psychotic, schizo, and violent thoughts on the comedown. It made me worry about what my mind is harboring away in there for when i get older... what kind of mental disease will be unleashed on my 40 year old self in twenty years? The entire time i was coming down it was a major battle to reassure myself that it was just the psilocybin effecting my neurotransmitters and making me think these strange things.
overall, a MUCH better & more interesting trip than the last, and I didn't feel the urge or need to trip again for months... although now i'd like to dip my toes in the water again and try maybe a 2.5 or 3 gram trip ;) Also, tripping in nature (& barefoot...) is MUCH better (for myself at least) than sitting in the same room watching it melt down on you and feeling yourself become a part of the couch. This time, I bonded with life