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My First Mind Scrub

I didn't even know I needed one

About a week ago I decided to try some of the cubes that I had collected from my first grow project. I had a few small ones and, while there were definitely some noticeable effects, there wasn't really anything to write about. I had what probably amounted to a light Level 1 experience with slight visual disturbances. So last night I decided to take the next step. I tucked the kids in bed, notified my wife of my impending departure (she's not yet ready to take a trip with me), then I measured out what I thought should get me to Level 3. What followed was my first real experience with psychedelics.

I started munching on my dried little guys while watching The Empire Strikes Back. Around 20 minutes after ingestion my wife left the room to take a bath and there were no effects that I could notice. At about the 30-40 minute mark is when I noticed the onset of the trip. The colors on my television screen became more pronounced and I felt my body becoming heavier. Shortly after my wife came out of the bathroom and asked me to come into the bedroom to brush her hair. The walk from my couch to my bedroom was interesting. Even though my body felt heavier than normal it felt as if I was floating just an inch off the floor.

I made it to the bedroom without incident and as I was brushing her hair, my wife was catching me up on the latest gossip involving her sister. I love my wife with all my heart and she is an amazing person, but I am ashamed to admit that sometimes I just don't care about the latest gossip and I have perfected the art of being present for these conversations without actually taking part in them. However, at this point in time, I found everything she was saying to be extremely interesting. As I was hanging on her every word, I started to become lost in the repetitive brush strokes. I was focusing on the pattern in her hair that was created by the bristles passing through it. The furrows in her damp silky hair became larger. They became canyons that I was in danger of falling into.

Somehow I made it out of there. My wife was returning to the family room to watch television and as I was floating along behind her I passed a picture frame in the hallway containing a collage of photographs. One photograph in particular caught my eye: a black and white image of my late father taken when he was young. In the picture, he was pointing off-screen and I always wondered what it was that he was pointing at. I spent some time there in the hallway, staring at the picture, when I became aware of the fact that the wall was breathing. Taking note of this phenomenon, but not really being surprised by it, I continued my journey.

Next I decided to visit my kids' collection of Skylanders (little toy figures that are like crack for kids). As I was watching them, they started moving. They stayed in place, but they began moving their limbs and eyes. Some of them were opening and closing their mouths and wagging their tongues. It was then that I noticed my dog was waiting to be let out the front door and I realized, holy shit, there's a whole world out there I haven't seen yet.

I went outside with the dog and while she was doing her business I stood on the front porch and explored the night sky. The moon was only maybe half full, but the world seemed to be perfectly illuminated. The stars above shifted and the low clouds that were sliding across the blackness of space, moving away from me to the west, suddenly stopped and for a moment reversed direction and then began to spiral overhead. The dog returned to the porch and we went back inside. I decided to join my wife in front of the television.

Sinking back into the couch, I discovered she had changed the channel (she was never a big Star Wars fan). She was watching a movie, but I can't recall what it was. I only remember being bored and uninterested while watching it. It made me feel as though my trip was ending, so I allowed my gaze to wander and that's when I saw him. There was a patchwork man hanging from my front door. He was a funny little hodgepodge of various bits of paper. He was there only briefly though, and when he was gone I tried to watch the movie that was playing with similarly disappointing results. Watching a film is apparently not conducive to my tripping process. Movies are too structured. Too organized. I think I need more of a sandbox to play in while tripping. Realizing this, I decided to try my luck outside again and I made my way onto the deck overlooking my back yard.

In the back the clouds were sliding toward me from the east. As I watched, one of the clouds directly overhead shifted into an elephant (trite, I know). And then I was treated to one of the most badass experiences of my life. Over the treetops came a humongous three-headed dragon. Its heads rose up as it bore down on me. I was more impressed than freaked out. I was hoping it would do something spectacular, but alas, it passed overhead without so much as spouting flames.

I went back inside to find my wife asleep on the couch. I woke her up so that she could go to bed. I meant to go with her, but I was distracted by Legos. One of my kids had left a large Lego base plate on a nearby table with a single small tower built in the center of it. I picked up the base/tower and examined it closely. It became huge and filled my field of vision and I was reminded of Stephen King's Dark Tower book series. I'm not sure how long I studied the tower and the landscape surrounding it, but it must have been a while because an incoming text message brought me back to reality. It was a text from my wife asking me to come to bed.

I did as my lady asked. I abandoned my quest for the Dark Tower and the next thing I knew I was in bed lying in bed next to her, running my fingers along her skin. It was more of a spiritual experience than a sensual one. All of my senses were collected into my fingertips as they explored her body.

Later I felt that my body was getting tired, but my mind was not. If there was an unpleasant experience of the night, it was here. Staring at my blank ceiling I began to see things that I cannot describe. Once I was just on the verge of sleep when I heard a sharp buzzing sound that woke me up again. I decided to put headphones on and listen to some music. That may have been the best decision I've ever made.

The music penetrated my brain. Some songs affected me more than others. "Nutshell" by Alice in Chains, "Schism" by Tool, and especially "Lotus Flower" by Radiohead are songs that I can now recommend for a tripping soundtrack. I was hearing notes that I had never noticed before and the music was scrubbing my mind. It was defragging my hard drive. The notes carried me off to Dreamland.

I awoke this morning refreshed and completely free of anything resembling stress. I can't wait to see the world with my new eyes.

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